The Only Thing
by DayDreamer P
Summary: I had to repost this story due to some problems...it's seems that this site doesn't like to show my fanfics! Anyway, the summary is: Kid and Lou met before the beginning of the Pony Express, while they are both working in Wicks' brothel
1. Chapter 1

**THE ONLY THING**

**by Daydreamer P.**

_As ever, thank you from my beta-reader Broedy. Thank you dear!_

**Chapter 1**

Kid hated his life, hated his job, and hated the man he had considered his benefactor until few days before.

Wicks had hired him when he was nothing more than a simple boy just arrived in the West from his native Virginia. Kid hadn't been so naïve not to understand what kind of place Wicks ran, but he had been the first man to give him a chance and he had accepted it.

There had been generous tips, and wonderful stories of the West to hear, and then there had been the girls.

Kid felt guilty for what he did, his mother surely wouldn't have approved, but those women were so charming, so beautiful and so…available…that he couldn't resist. They had approach him first; his boyish face and his gentle, bashful manners were something they rarely saw so they gladly satisfied his curiosity and his needs about sex.

"You're so cute; it's a pleasure," they told him. "You don't even have to pay us."

They smiled at his embarrassment and Kid felt even guiltier, if it were possible, but he was a young boy full of energy after all, and he had surrendered to their seduction pretty easily.

In spite of everything he liked to work there, but then he discovered the real nature of that place.

One day, about three months after his arrival, Kid saw one of the girls with a black eye.

"It was an accident," she had told him, and Kid believed her.

But since then he began to notice how often one of the girls had a bruise or a scratch somewhere, and the hatred they harbored for Wicks behind their smiles. One day he found Sally lying on the ground in the alley behind the brothel. She was curled in a ball, crying with pain. Quickly Kid swooped her in his arms and he brought her in her room.

"Charlotte! Cora!" he had called the others, "Run! Sally is hurt!"

He had carefully laid the squirming girl on her bed.

"Go out, Kid," Charlotte told him while the others girls fretted over their friend.

"We...we have to call a doctor," he had tried to say.

"The doctor has already done enough," had been Cora's spiteful reply. "Go out now, boy," she ordered.

They shut him out of the room and Kid couldn't do anything else than wait, sitting on the floor with his head in his hands and listening Sally's moans.

The girl died that night. She was pregnant and Wicks had forced her to get rid of it. Sally wanted that baby, she had tried to keep her pregnancy hidden as long as possible. She hoped that if she was too far along, Wicks would be forced to let her keep the baby. But that man didn't have any mercy for her.

When Charlotte explained to Kid what had happened she had to restrain him, otherwise he would have burst into Wicks' rooms with his gun in hand.

"It's useless, Kid," she had told him, "you'll just get yourself killed."

But Kid couldn't understand how they could resign themselves like that. A friend of theirs had died, and who knew how many other girls had to endure a similar fate. He cried bitterly that night, and he swore to himself that he would leave that damned place.

But then he met Louise.

It happened only a couple of weeks after Sally's funeral. Kid was leading one of Wicks' horses back to its stall, when he saw Charlotte with a small girl. She must have been about the same age as he was, but she was so petite that she still looked like a child. Her long chestnut hair hung in a thick braid that reached her waist, and her big brown eyes were fixed on those ones of the woman with whom she was talking.

Kid felt his heart burst in his chest at the thought of Wicks or someone else laying his hands on a girl so small and delicate, and it made him feel sick. They went inside and Kid followed them. He couldn't find them, though, and he didn't dare to ask. When he didn't see her that evening at the saloon, he was relieved. The boy knew that many girls had begun to work there when they were not much older than the mysterious girl he's seen that afternoon, but he truly hoped that her destiny would be different.

°°°°°°

A couple of days later, entering in the barn, Kid saw some clothes hung up to dry in one of the empty stalls.

"What the heck…?" He was so surprised that he didn't see the chest of clothes on the ground and tripped on it.

"Watch your feet! You fool!"

Kid turned to see who had scolded him and remained speechless. The girl from the other day was glaring at him with her hands on her hips.

"I'm sorry." He was so stunned that he couldn't manage to say anything else. The girl quickly crouched and began to gather the scattered clothes.

"What a mess…" Kid heard her murmur. "Now Mr. Wicks will surely fire me…"

Her voice began to tremble. In a moment Kid was at her side.

"Wait, I'll help." He shook the clothes, removing the hay sticking to the fabric. Fortunately he had just cleaned that stall, so the mess wasn't irreparable.

"Done," he said when he finished cleaning the last petticoat. "If you want I can help hang them too."

He smiled. The girl returned his smile and Kid's heart somersaulted in his chest.

"Folks call me Kid," he said when he realized he was staring at her.

"Nice to meet you, Kid," she responded, taking his outstretched hand. "I'm Louise McCloud, the new laundress."

At her words Kid felt relieved. "Ah, so you aren't one of the, of the…" He didn't know what word to use so as not to upset her.

"One of the artists? No I just take care of her costumes."

"Costumes?"

"Yes, these ones." She held out one of the dresses. "For the evening shows."

Louise thought that Wicks' brothel was a sort of theatre. How could she be so naïve?

"Sorry, Louise, but…how old are you?"

"Fourteen," she lied, since she would only be turning fourteen in three months. "Why, how old are you?"

"Ah...oh...well, I'm fifteen," he stammered.

They continued to hang clothes in a companionable silence. When they finished Louise smiled again.

"Thank you," she said. "And sorry for having yelled before."

Kid shrugged. "It was my fault. It's only that I didn't expect to find a clothesline inside a barn!" He laughed.

"I didn't know where else I could put them, it's threatening to rain and I don't want to spoil all my work."

"So this means that you'll come here again?" Kid's voice sounded more hopeful than he wanted, but he couldn't help himself.

"Oh well, until the good season, that's for sure," she responded, blushing.

°°°°°°

Louise McCloud was smiling broadly when she came back inside. She couldn't believe her good luck. Until few days ago she was begging outside St. Joe's shops and now she had a place to live, a job–hard but honest–and a new friend.

The boy had been the only one, besides Charlotte, to treat her kindly. She hadn't seen Mr. Wicks since the day he hired her and the other girls ignored or bullied her.

A sharp voice distracted her from her thoughts. "Louise! Have you finished my hem?"

"Yes, Miss Cora. Here's your dress." She quickly handed the dress to the woman.

Cora Murphy had seen the girl jump almost out of her skin when she had called her, but she ignored it; she just checked her dress.

"Good," she said and then she went away without another word. _'She's not bad with a needle,'_ the woman thought. _'If she were smarter she could find a job as seamstress.'_ Cora shook her head bitterly. Those were useless thoughts, now that Wicks had her.

She went outside into the backyard and saw Kid. The boy was whistling and greeted her, smiling. She noticed he was holding a chest of laundry and immediately understood the reason behind his happiness.

"Hey, Kid!" she called him, "From that grin on your face, I suppose you've met little Louise."

He nodded.

"Now I understand why you haven't shown yourself in our quarters lately," she replied archly.

Kid's face reddened. It was true, he hadn't sleep with anyone of them since – he couldn't think of sex after what had happened to Sally.

"Let me give you some advice," Cora continued. "Don't grow too close to her. She belongs to Wicks. He loves pretty little things like her and doesn't like to share them. Not until he's had enough of them, at least. Trust me, boy, leave her alone if you don't want to suffer."

She left him then. She knew she had sounded cold and cynical, but she had seen too many young girls destroyed by that man, and she'd stopped to try to save them. Sally had been the last one. Now Cora had learned it was better to harden her heart than let another victim of that bastard break it.

Kid was shocked at what Cora had told him. He already feared that Wicks wanted to make Louise another of her prostitutes, he wasn't so naïve to believe he had hired her only to do the laundry. But Cora's words made him imagine something even darker and more terrible for Louise. Kid felt his heart constrict. He wouldn't let someone hurt Louise, he swore to himself. Even if it was the last thing he did.


	2. Chapter 2

**THE ONLY THING**

**by Daydreamer P.**

**Chapter 2**

It was almost a year since Louise's arrival at Wicks' brothel and the girl and Kid had become close friends. Every time one of them had some free time they spent it together, helping one another with their respective tasks in the laundry or the stables. They took a walk every chance they got and they spent hours talking about their dreams for the future, or remembering their past.

Kid told her how he had to leave his home in Virginia after his mother's death and how sometimes he missed what he left there but how, on the other hand, he was happy to have moved West, because he wanted to start a new life there.

Louise felt somewhat jealous of Kid's attachment to his homeland and the friends he left back East; she never had a place to call home. Her mother had moved a lot from town to town after they left her father and she never had the chance to make real friends or to grow close to any place. But she had her brother and sister. They were her family and her dream was to take them away from the orphanage she had run away from, and they would live together.

When Kid found out that she had siblings and that they lived in an orphanage in the outskirts of the town, he offered to deliver her letters to them. He'd never forgiven himself for not having been able to keep in touch with his older brother Jed; and he was touched by the sacrifice Louise was making for her younger brother and sister, working in a place like that in order to make enough money to build a future for them. So every time Wicks sent him on an errand he found a way to go to the orphanage to see Jeremiah and Teresa. It wasn't a simple thing to accomplish, but Louise's smile repaid him for all of his efforts.

She was becoming more beautiful every day. Louise didn't realize the changes in her body, but Kid was fully aware of them. When she arrived at Wicks' place she was nothing more than a child, now everyone could see the young blossom of woman she had become, and this scared Kid. He knew that Wicks was waiting for the right moment to pick that blossom.

Kid had gotten into the habit of secretly looking after her. He knew that if Louise discovered it she would be mad at him, but she seemed not understand the place she was in. When he had tried to explain to her what Charlotte and the other girls really were, Louise had gotten angry.

"Charlotte is my friend," she had told him. "I know that this isn't the most respectable of places, but if you call her that I won't be your friend anymore."

Kid had stopped then, but he continued to watch over her; he would rather Louise detest him than someone hurt her.

Louise, for her part, was beginning to feel very uncomfortable in that house. She didn't want to believe what Kid had told her. She couldn't think about her friend Charlotte being a prostitute and, worse, that it would also be her fate if she remained there. But she couldn't not notice the men who came to the house, or the lustful glances they threw in the girls' direction. Louise could only imagine what they did behind closed doors and the thought that one of those men would do the same thing with her frightened her. For this reason she tried to spend as much time as possible with Charlotte or at the stables with Kid. That was the only time she felt safe.

One evening Louise found a drunken man in front of the door to the laundry.

"Mi-mister, you got it wrong. The girls' rooms are over there," she tried to say.

"No need to hurry, kitty. You're a girl too, ain't you?" he slurred, putting his arm on the wall and blocking her way.

"N-no, mister, I-I'm not…" Louise panicked. There wasn't anybody in the hallway and the loud music from the saloon would prevent anyone from hearing her.

"Please, mister." The first tears began to roll down her cheeks.

"Are you new, kitty? Don't worry. I'll explain how things work around here…" he smirked.

The man grabbed her face and kissed her hard. Louise tried to struggle, feeling her heart hammering in her chest, but he held her arms and pinned her against the wall with his body.

Suddenly someone grabbed the man and pushed him away.

"You bastard! Get your hands off her!" an angry voice bellowed.

"Calm down, boy. You can have your turn as soon as I've finished…"

Kid pulled out his gun.

"I said leave her alone." His blue eyes became ice.

"Okay, boy…" the man muttered. "She's all yours."

He staggered away, deciding that the girl wasn't worth his life.

Kid's attention went immediately to Louise. She was curled on the floor, trembling.

"Louise? Are you okay? Did that man hurt you?"

He took her in his arms, consoling her the best he could, though he himself was trembling from rage and fear.

"I was s-scared." She was on the verge of the tears, and kept her face hidden against his chest as she began to sob in earnest. Kid held her tightly, acutely aware of the closeness of her body, but he took a deep breath to regain his composure and focus his attention on her.

"It's okay, darling, it's all okay," he whispered, continuing to stroke her back and hair until she calmed down.

He helped her get up and then accompanied her to her room.

"Wait here, Louise. I'll go call Charlotte."

"No! Please, stay with me tonight."

Kid blushed, immediately thinking about the other girls and what it meant to spend the night with them. But Louise wasn't one of the girls, she was special. She made his heart beat faster simply by smiling at him, and his stomach twisted every time he saw her return inside that damned house.

"Okay," Kid whispered, unsure of his own voice.

He waited outside while Louise changed into a nightgown. When he came inside she was already in bed. He took a blanket and he prepared himself to spend the night on the floor.

"Kid," she called after a while, "can you hold me?"

She was bewildered at her own words, but she couldn't help herself, that man had really scared her and she felt the need of Kid's proximity. He climbed onto the bed and laid on his side. His heart was beating so fast he feared Louise would hear it. He stretched out to turn down the lamp and then he put an arm around her small shoulders.

"Goodnight, Louise."

"Goodnight, Kid," she responded in a whisper.

In the darkness Kid couldn't see her, but he felt her little body near him. She had crossed her hands in front of her chest, as if to protect herself, and she rested her cheek on his shoulder. The boy had never felt such emotion – his first time with one of the girls hadn't been like this. In that moment he felt he could stay forever like this, just embracing Louise.

The girl had cuddled up against his warmth. She felt her cheeks burning and her heart beating wildly, but at the same time she had never felt so good.

"Louise," Kid said softly, "would you go away with me?"

"W-what?" She had been beginning to doze off, but now she lifted her head abruptly to look into his eyes.

Kid hurriedly continued. "I have some money. If you go away with me we can find other work together, maybe at a ranch outside town, so we'll be near your brother and sister."

Louise was touched. "I'd like that."

"Really?"

"Really," she answered timidly.

Kid held her tightly, thrilled, and kissed the top of her head. When he realized what he had done he released her immediately, afraid of having scared her. But Louise smiled, cuddling against him once more. She gave him a quick peck on the cheek before hid her face again.

"Goodnight again, Kid."

Kid was arranging the last detail. A week had passed since he had asked to Louise to go away with him, and tomorrow they would finally be leaving. They had pooled their money to buy two tickets for St. Louis. They thought it would be safer to go somewhere far away, at least for the first weeks. At the crack of dawn they would run away from Wicks brothel and then they would take the morning stagecoach. Kid hid a sack with his things in the hay and then he headed toward his bunk at the end of the stable.

"Hey, Kid," someone called him.

"Hello, Hank," he greeted one of Wicks' men who was leaning against the wall and looking at him leeringly.

"It's a bit early to be turning in for the night, isn't it? Come with me, the girls miss you." He passed a friendly arm around Kid's shoulders, but he tightened his hold until he prevented any movement from the boy. Kid was forced to follow him outside.

"I like you, boy," Hank said. "It's a pity you made the boss so angry."

"W-what?"

"Boy!" Another man came out from the shadows. "You've been very stupid."

Kid found himself surrounded by a third man.

"With all the girls around here, why'd you have to choose a girl Wicks hasn't tried yet? Such an insignificant little mouse like her…" Hank's voice sounded almost sad.

"But don't worry," he leered. "The boss is making up for that."

Kid immediately understood the man's words.

"Louise!" he exclaimed.

Kid tried to run to his friend, but the men were faster. Two of them held his arms while Hank punched his stomach so hard to make him fall to the ground, breathless. They kicked him hard in the ribs, the head, and in the back. Kid tried to protect himself the best he could but he quickly succumbed. "Louise…" he murmured before lost consciousness.

"Stop, guys," Hank said. "C'mon, let's get rid of this rubbish. Wicks doesn't want him around anymore."

They dragged him away, while Louise faced her worst nightmare alone.

Kid came to his senses the next morning, with a mouth full of blood and dirt. They had thrown him into the nearby creek, perhaps thinking he would drown in the swallow water. Fortunately the weak stream had transported him to the shore and he remained there, half-submerged but alive.

The boy rose to his knees, spitting out water and blood. He was still confused and disoriented but suddenly the thought of his friend hit him.

"Louise!"

He got up, staggering, feeling sore everywhere but he had felt worse. He remained still for few more seconds to regain a little stability and then he began to run toward Wicks' brothel, his bruised ribs making every breath painful. Kid reached the back door, at the time of day everyone was still sleeping so he continued undisturbed to Louise's room. He stopped before her door, his heart tightening into a knot of fear for what he would find inside. Slowly he opened it and what he saw made his blood freeze.

Louise was lying half-naked on the floor, unconscious.

"Louise," Kid whispered in horror.

When he got closer he noted her torn dress, the bruises on her face and on her body, and the blood. He had to suppress the bile rising in his throat. He hastily took a sheet from the bed and covered her, and then he leaned out of the door.

"Charlotte!" he yelled. "Charlotte!" He didn't care if someone heard him. At that moment he felt as if he could kill whoever stood in his way with his bare hands.

Charlotte arrived, still sleepy, and in the same clothes as the evening before. When she saw the girl on the ground she covered her mouth with her hands, silencing a scream of horror.

"Oh no, Louise!" Charlotte had hoped that Louise would manage to escape before Wicks decided to take her, but instead…

"I'll kill him." Kid's frosty voice distracted her.

The boy had never felt a hate so powerful, not even his father had caused him to feel such a blind rage. He turned towards the door.

"No, Kid! Wait!" Charlotte stopped him. Her cheeks were wet from her tears but she blocked him firmly.

"What? Why do I have to wait! So he can take her again? So he can he kill her? I won't let him even lay his eyes on Louise again!"

"Kid!" Charlotte tightened her hold. "It's useless, Wicks'll kill you. Louise needs you now. You two were planning to go away, weren't you? Take your things and make yourself presentable. I'll take care of Louise and then I'll bring her to you at the stables."

"I…I can't leave her…What will happen if someone returns…"

"Everyone is sleeping. Nobody will disturb us. Please Kid, go now…"


	3. Chapter 3

THE ONLY THING 

By Daydreamer P.

_Here they are two new chapters of my story. I know, I'm quite slow with the updates, but I assure that this story won't remain unfinished so, please, continue to read it!_

_A big thank to Broedy and Ellie for their help, and to Enzdi for reading this story._

Chapter 3 

Kid observed his friend sleep leaning against the stagecoach's window. She was curled up in herself with her arms crossed on her chest, almost in a foetal position. He adjusted his jacket on her shoulder, hesitated a moment and then he caressed her cheek, grateful of the fact she didn't recoil from his touch.

Since that damned morning, when Charlotte had brought Louise to him, the girl had barely spoken to him, and she never looked at him in the eyes. Kid would have done anything to hold her tight and make her feel safe, but now the only thing he could do was to touch when she was sleeping.

The boy had seen the scared look on Louise's face, the way she tried to sit as far as possible from him and the other passengers. Probably she hated him because he hadn't been able to protect her, but Kid wouldn't abandon her, he would take care of Louise even if she didn't want to have anything to do with him ever again.

"St Louis!" the stagecoach announced.

They finally had arrived. Kid got off and took their luggage then he turned to help Louise, but she had already dismounted and now she was staring at him with her arms crossed in that way that had became customary to her.

"Let's find somewhere to stay, ok?" Kid had talked to her softly, he had noticed how she startled every time someone talk too loud or too harshly.

The girl nodded and followed him. Kid was the only one she could trust for the time being. He could have gone away from Wicks' brothel a long time ago but he chose to remain with her. Wicks' men had beaten him badly because of her and they would probably kill the both of them if they found them, but Kid didn't abandon her. He had brought her away from there and taken care of her. Even if she hadn't the nerve to tell him, the only thing that made her go through those days of pain and shame had been his blue eyes and his gentle smile.

"Narcissus Pook." Kid said to the hotel clerk.

Louise's eyes popped out of her head. That was the weirdest name she had ever heard. Despite her current situation she found herself biting her lips to not laugh and silently followed her friend upstairs.

"Narcissus Pook!?" she exclaimed when they found themselves alone. "What kind of name is that?"

"It is my real name." Kid shrugged, clearly embarrassed. "Jethro Narcissus Pook, after my father and my grandfather …oh well I thought it would be better to use a name no one knows me by."

"Oh…" Louise was speechless at his revelation. No wonder he preferred to be called the Kid.

"I'm sorry …Narcissus Pook…" she smiled impishly.

At that sight Kid's heart soared. For the first time since they left St Joe, Louise didn't seem the scared little bird she had become.

°°°°°°

Kid woke up suddenly; Louise was thrashing and moaning in the bed near his. It had already happened during their trip, but never in such a violent way. She was curled up in herself and her cheeks were wet with tears.

Immediately the boy approached her and lighted the lamp on the nightstand to get a better look at her. She gnashed her teeth from the pain and her hands clutched her belly frantically. Kid's heart skipped a beat, that was the way he had found Sally the day she died.

He brushed away a sweaty lock from her forehead.

"Louise." He called softly. "Louise…"

The girl cracked open her eyes to look at him. "It hurts."

"I know darling." He caressed her face. "I have to bring you to a doctor."

She shook her head terrified. "No! Please, no doctor."

"But you need help!"

"Please Kid…" she managed to say one last time, then she closed her eyes again, breathing in short gasps, trying to fight the pain that was tearing her inside.

"OK…" Kid muttered.

He tried to remember how the girls had taken care of Sally and hoped it was enough.

°°°°°°

The morning after found them asleep and embracing, Louise's face was resting on Kid's chest while his arms surrounded her protectively. The girl was exhausted and her lower belly and legs felt sore and weak, but the pain had disappeared. She didn't completely understand what had happened to her but she thanked God that Kid was with her. He had never left her, he had soothed her, rocked her and took care of her the best he could.

Louise observed his face lying on the pillow next to her. It was relaxed now, almost childish in his serenity. Her look fell on his slightly parted lips. She felt stupid now but, when she first met Kid, she had fantasized a lot about how would have been to receive her first kiss from him. But she didn't have a first kiss to give anymore, nor a first special time to share with the man she loved she thought bitterly.

The girl shook her head to chase away those bad thoughts and returned to look at Kid. She hesitated for a moment, and then she stretched out to brush her lips against his. Kid stirred and Louise hurried to lower her head.

"Good morning."

She heard his sleepy voice and raised again her eyes. He was adorable with that goofy half-awake expression on his face.

"Good Morning to you too, Kid."

°°°°°°

In the following days Louise stayed in bed for the most of the time. She felt weak for from the blood she had lost and also Kid feared moving her too much could hurt her. The boy continued to pay for the room they shared with his money. He knew that sooner or later they would use up his savings but he didn't know what else he could do. Louise wasn't well and she was still scared; she hadn't said anything but Kid could read the fear in her eyes every time he left her alone and the few times he tried to take her to the hotel's restaurant or out, for a walk, she grabbed his arm with all her force, and she was barely able to conceal her trembling. She still hadn't overcome what Wicks did to her, she needed time to recover, and Kid was ready to give it to her, even if it meant to spend all the money he had.

When he wasn't with Louise Kid looked for a job, but it wasn't easy. St Louis was a big city, but there weren't many people ready to give a job to a boy like him, this was the reason he had ended up with Wicks, the first time. Luckily the hotel owner had accepted his proposal to pay half-price for their room in exchange for his work at the stables; but Kid knew he couldn't go on like this, he needed to find a permanent solution.

°°°°°°

Louise put down the book she was reading and puffed. It was a nice book, Kid had bought it for her so she wouldn't get bored when he wasn't with her, but the girl couldn't bear anymore to stay closed in that room. The first days she didn't complain, she still was too weak and barely could get out of her bed; but now she was beginning to feel better, and bored. She had even yelled at Kid before. Now Louise felt guilty for that outburst but she wasn't used to twiddling her thumbs all day and that forced inactivity was making her crazy.

On the other hand she still wasn't able to leave the room, not alone at least. Kid tried to take her to the hotel restaurant sometimes, or out for a little walk, but she couldn't even go through the hall. It seemed to her that all the people were staring at her, and that they could see what had happened to her and how dirty she felt.

But such behaviour was unlike her, she couldn't go on like this; she had to find the force to go out and face the world, and this moment was as good as any. She got up from the bed, she took her time to dress and brush her hair and when she finally felt she was ready she went to the door.

Louise leaned her hand on the door-handle, she took a deep breath and then she forced herself to open the door. She remained for a moment on the threshold, there wasn't anyone in the hallway and this calmed her a little. She exited from her room and rapidly closed the door behind her, before she could change her mind.

At the beginning she was so tense that even the slightest noise made her freeze on her spot, but little by little she began to relax. '_This is a hotel' _Louise said to herself '_not the Wicks' brothel_'She arrived to the hall, another deep breath and she went outside.

She stopped another time, observing the busy people on the street. Nobody seemed to notice her, but Louise had to fight the impulse of running away. _'You're in St. Louis. Nobody knows you. You're safe here.'_ she repeated. But still she felt as if she was watched, as if every man who passed could grab her and bring her away, without the chance for her to avoid it.

Suddenly she saw Kid in the alley that led to the back of the hotel. Her heart gladdened for the relief and she ran toward him. He looked as if he was talking to someone, maybe he had found a job, Louise thought hopefully. She slowed down not to run straight in his arms. When she was the expression on his face she stopped though. Kid was talking with the hotel owner.

"Boy…" the man was saying, "I'm not saying you aren't doing a good job, but I can't continue to keep a room tied up like this. If your sister comes to work for me, maybe I can let you have one of the bosses' rooms."

"Louise is sick, she can't work now."

"I'll see…but I've my business to think about so…or either you pay the whole price again, or I'll have to make you leave… you understand me?"

Kid swallowed and nodded.

"Are you really sure your sister can't work? A pretty little girl like her is always welcomed among my maids."

"No!" Kid responded vehemently. "No. I'll go back to paying the full price."

Louise heard the desperation in Kid's voice and a sudden thought hit her. Kid had spent his saving for their room and now he was working to pay it. She got angry, things should not have gone that way. Kid should have looked for a job for the both of them, not provide for the both of them as if she was an incompetent child.

But she had been just that for all that time, she hadn't been even able to go out of her room without trembling! Wicks had made her became a shadow of herself. How could she have permitted it?

The girl ran back to their room and took the pouch where Kid kept his savings: there was less than half of his money. That fool had spent it for her. It couldn't continue like that, it shouldn't be him taking care of the both of them. Louise felt she had to find the way to face the world again. But how?

Her glance fell on Kid's spare clothes…

°°°°°°

Kid came back to their room with a heavy heart. The owner had done all but drive them away. Sure, they didn't have to leave immediately, but soon the money would be gone and they wouldn't have a place to stay. He sighed and opened the door.

What he saw made him pale.

A boy was rummaging in their things, and Louise was nowhere to be seen.

"Stop!" he said coldly. He pointed his gun to him and cocked it. "Turn slowly with your hands up."

If he had dared to lay a finger on Louise…

He found in front of him a small boy with two wide scared eyes. It took a moment and then Kid's expression changed abruptly.

"Louise!" he exclaimed.

Kid dropped his gun and kept staring at her. For several seconds, his brain refused to form a coherent thought.

"Your hair…my clothes…" he babbled. He reached out a hand to brush the tips of her now short hair.

"Your beautiful braid…" he couldn't help but whisper, Kid loved her long hair, even if he had never told it to her.

"Why?" he finally managed to say. "Why did you dress like a boy?"

"To find a job!" the girl exclaimed.

"Louise, you don't have to do that. You still need to recover."

Kid was still trying to protect her, but this made her mad.

"You spent all your savings! You lied to me Kid! You've told me you were looking for a job for the both of us, instead you were working to pay the hotel!!"

The girl punched hard his chest, while tears of rage and frustration threatened to spill out her eyes.

"You didn't have to do that…"

Her rage was rapidly fading, "You should have told me there was a problem. We are in this together!"

She sat down on the bed, angrily brushing away the tears she couldn't hold back.

"I'm sorry Louise…" Kid sat near her. "It's only that I saw you so troubled and I didn't want to upset you further…I wanted you to feel ok…"

"I know." She responded after a while. "And I thank you for that…but I don't want to be a burden."

She raised her head to look at him in the eyes.

"If I can't go out of this damned room as Louise, I want to try as Lou."

Kid wasn't totally convinced of her decision. Even with his oversized clothes on she still was the prettiest girl he had ever seen, plus she still didn't look well. But if that was the first step to regain her trust in the world, then it was fine for him.

"Ok, Lou. Let's try to find something to do."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Kid and Lou didn't have the luck they hoped for. After they left the hotel they looked desperately for a job, but nobody needed two young boys. They did odd jobs scraping together just enough to eat, but they couldn't afford to pay for the room they had, or settle anywhere else.

They had spent the last month sleeping in stables or liveries, but they couldn't go on like this. Louise wasn't well, Kid had noticed it. She got tired easily and often the boy felt her hot when they bedded for the night, some days her cheeks were flushed and her eyes glossy, but she stubbornly continued to say to him that she was fine. The warning glances the girl shot at him when he dared to say something more, prevented Kid from showing his worry about her health; but when he held her at night, he was frightened at her shivering.

They had almost lost the hope of finding a job in St Joe when finally they got their chance. An old lady who owned a little farm just outside the town offered a job, only to one of them though.

The widow Sutton had been generous, when she found Kid and Lou in the barn she had menaced them with her shotgun – and by hard expression there wasn't any doubt of the fact she was able to use it against them – but as soon as the woman realized that they were only two scrawny boys, one just about to faint for the exhaustion, she took them inside and gave them something to eat.

Lucille Sutton's house wasn't big, it was obvious that she wasn't wealthy, but she made her offer all the same. If one of them wanted, he could remain with her, helping around the small farm. She couldn't afford to hire two people, she said, but she was willing to help at least one of them.

When the woman left them alone to decide, Kid spoke first.

He told Lou he intended to leave. It broke his heart, but this was a good place for her, the boy told. The widow wasn't a tender woman, but she was honest and with her Louise would have a place to spend the winter.

"You told me we would remain together!" the girl yelled when he finished his talk. "You can't decide for me too."

"Lou, think about Jeremiah and Teresa…"

"Don't involve them, Kid! I'm the one who decides what's best for them!"

"I know that, but try to understand! You'll have a place where you can recover and you'll be able to save your money…" his voice broke "Please Lou, we won't have another chance like this…"

Louise tried to rebut but Kid was right…even if she denied it, she still felt weak, more than one time she had fallen asleep feverish, and often Kid had had to do her share of work. Her mind was telling that it would have been better for both of them if they parted, but her heart couldn't bear the thought of losing him.

She clutched his shirt.

"I don't want to lose you."

"Neither do I, Lou." He covered her hand with his own. "But…I don't know what else we could do…" he was helpless.

"I know."

Lou hugged him hard, burying her face in his chest. She needed to stay there, she realized. She couldn't fall ill. Her mother worked hard for her children, not thinking about her health, and she died in the end; but Louise understood that the first thing she could do for Jeremiah and Teresa was to take care of herself. For this reason she and Kid had to separate.

She couldn't restrain a sob; Kid's arms immediately rose to embrace her tightly, caressing her, soothing her silently. The girl felt him push her slightly and looked up at his face.

"This isn't a goodbye, Louise, I swear it to you." He said gravely looking in her eyes.

Then he lowered his head. One hand went to caress the nape of her neck, while the other surrounded her back and shoulders. When Louise felt his tongue gently sliding in her mouth she was shocked for a moment. Then slowly, timidly, she began to respond to his kiss.

°°°°°°

Louise didn't see Kid ever again. She stayed with the widow for almost six months. With her help the girl recovered and the old woman taught to her how to ride, how to shoot, how to behave as a boy. The old woman had done something similar to survive when she was young so she was willing to give Lou a hand, in that gruff way that the hardship of her life made her acquire.

During that period Louise had kept in touch with Kid. She learned that he had returned to the orphanage, to tell her siblings that she was well. The girl's heart swelled with love thinking about the risks he had taken, returning to St Joe only to reassure her brother and sister.

She responded to all of his letters, even if it was difficult since he never stayed too much in one place. The last one Louise received said that her friend had begun to work for the railroad. That news scared her, often it was heard of accidents in the railroad's building sites. Louise wrote him a worried letter, asking Kid to come back to her, but she never received an answer.

A couple of weeks after Louise sent her letter, Lucille Sutton died of a heart attack. She was buried with a small ceremony near the husband and the son she lost too soon. Few people took part in her funeral, since she was quite a gruff and lonely woman, but Lou cried sincerely at her death.

The girl left St Louis with the horse the widow left her, a young black mare called Lighting. She never again was able to settle somewhere. She accepted every honest work she could get, always carefully hiding her true identity.

Louise had never felt so alone: she missed Jeremiah and Teresa, whom she had never written, since she was still scared of Wicks, and she missed Kid.

She missed his blue-sky eyes, his sweet smile, his bashfulness that made him irresistibly cute sometimes. She even missed his worry, his will to protect her and to make her feel good at any cost that almost suffocated her and made her want to whack him on the head.

After Lucille's death, Louise went to the place where Kid worked, a site near the North Platte River. When she asked of him to the foreman, the man shook sadly his head, telling her about a sudden flood that had brought away seven of his men, and that Kid's was one of the bodies they never found again.

That man was nice to her, he made her eat and rest and then he gave her the Kid's little belongings: few photos, some small things that reminded him of Virginia, the letters she wrote to him. At that sight Louise's knees gave way and she burst into tears, heedless of the fact that it might give away that she was a girl.

Louise left that place the next day, with the Kid's last salary in her pocket and death in her heart. She would never see again his gentle face, she would never again wake up in his arms with her heart beating fast, she would never feel again his lips on hers, in that only sweet kiss they shared.

The girl wandered without a direction for a week, she didn't know what to do now that there wasn't Kid anymore. Then she found a letter among Kid's stuff. It was addressed to her brother and sister and in it Kid said that he would visit them soon and that her sister Louise loved them and always thought about them, even if she didn't write to them.

Teresa and Jeremiah.

During all that time Kid had continued to think about them too…and what did she do, instead? Lou had forgotten that all she did was for them, that she had decided to run away from the orphanage and leave them behind, because she didn't want them to be separated and to assure them a better future.

Lost in her pain, blocked by her fears she had thought only about herself, but since that moment everything would change. Kid had saved her and helped her as much as he could; now it was up to her to react.

Her brother and sister were the only thing that remained to her, and now she had to move on, for them and for herself.

_If you want to kill me now, remember that this is a HAPPY Kid-Lou story…_


	5. Chapter 5

**THE ONLY THING**

**by Daydremaer P.**

Thank you to my wonderful beta Ellie. And thank you to Endzi e Mercy and to Kathleen and Hanny from the Ranch.

**Chapter 5**

Louise McCloud spurred her horse, heading towards the windmill she saw at the horizon. Her destination was the Pony Express station outside Sweetwater, what she hoped would be her home for quite a long time.

When she arrived she took her time to observe the ranch before dismounting. There was a small house surrounded by a little yard and a wooden fence, a barn with a wide corral and a bunkhouse. Lou grimaced, she knew that she would be expected to sleep there with men; she didn't the idea too much. Usually the girl tried to avoid situations like that, but it would appear too strange for her to sleep in the barn when there was a bunk for her.

There already were other boys, her future fellows. Only two of them already had a horse with them. She made out a palomino and a paint, whose owner was crouched to check its legs. A sudden shiver ran through her spine at that sight, a fleeting sensation, as a butterfly flap, that boy was familiar to her.

Finally she dismounted and went to introduce herself to those boys. There was a blonde guy with twinkling blue eyes and an impish expression, he tipped his hat and grinned in her direction; then there were what obviously was a half-blood Indian and a strange guy with a bandana that covered his bald head who sat close and greeted her with a nod. The owner of the palomino horse, a dark haired self-confident guy, looked at her dubiously.

Louise knew that face too well, he was thinking if a boy so small could work as hard as them. She didn't let him intimidate her, though. The girl squared her shoulders and outstretched her hand.

"Lou McCloud." She said with her best masculine voice.

While the boy responded, presenting himself as Jimmy Hickock, Lou noticed the boy with the paint mare stood up. He turned abruptly and went to her. She saw his astonished expression, his blue eyes, and immediately she recognized him.

"Kid." she breathed.

°°°°°°

Louise wanted too cry, to hug him tight, to laugh, yell at him and punch him hard for making her suffer so much, all at the same time. But she couldn't do anything like that, so she simply stood here, immobile and shocked, with her knees that threatened to give out. She resisted, though, it wasn't smart to faint in front of everyone and give away her masquerade on the first day of her new job.

"You…you are alive…" those were the only words she could manage to pronounce before Kid crushed her in a bear hug.

"Lou!" he exclaimed warmly, as if he had met an old friend.

"Louise…" he murmured at her ear with a low and husky tone that told her so much more; he held her tight for a moment more than necessary, then he let her go.

"I thought I would never see you again." He said, holding her by the shoulders.

Kid was smiling, and his eyes were glistening, but he didn't say more, he couldn't in front of the others.

"You didn't think you'd see me again?!" The girl exclaimed. "Damn Kid! I thought you were dead!"

She pushed away his arms roughly and she glared angrily at him, with the arms crossed before her chest. Lou was really mad at him, for two years she thought she had lost him forever and she had made every effort to go on without him and now he was in front of her, smiling as if nothing happened.

"You…you moron!" she shouted, punching him hard.

Kid doubled for the pain, the small but surprisingly strong fist of Lou had hit him exactly at the pit of his stomach.

"Hey! You've got spunk for being so small!" the blonde guy exclaimed then.

The others laugh heartily. All the initial diffidence among them had now disappeared.

°°°°°°

At the end of that first day the newly hired Pony Express riders were so exhausted that they barely could stand up. That morning they had gotten to know the weirdest man they had ever met; Teaspoon Hunter was his name and he had welcomed them from a water trough where he was taking a bath. But, despite his odd appearance and his predilection for bear grease and onions, Teaspoon had been a capable and inflexible teacher.

Lou, who thought she was used to sitting on a horse for all the day, almost didn't feel her legs. Kid and that Indian boy called Buck seemed the only ones still able to stand up, even if their backsides must be quite tender. The blonde guy, Cody, and the other two, Jimmy and Ike, were as tired as her.

Fortunately the dinner their station-mistress Emma prepared repaid them for all the hard work of the day. That woman had immediately taken them under her wing and Lou was happy about that. For a long time, Lou had missed having someone to take care of her and she was glad not to be the only woman around there.

°°°°°°

After the dinner Lou exited and went to the barn looking for Kid. During the day they hadn't had the time to talk alone. She couldn't smile at him, nor observe him as much as she wanted. They told the other riders they were old friends, but this didn't give her the opportunity to be with him as she would have wanted.

Louise wanted ask to him so many things that she didn't know where to begin but, above all, she wanted to understand if the years apart had changed what existed between them.

Kid wasn't the boy she knew anymore; he was almost a man now. Taller, his shoulders broader, on his cheeks the shadow of a beard that he didn't have before. With her heart in her throat, Lou had watched Kid accept a challenge Jimmy threw at him and she had been so proud of him when he beat the dark haired guy without losing his calm.

Hickock was shooting at some cans he had put on the fence; he was deathly swift and accurate, hitting all the target in less than five seconds. He was pretty haughty of his prowess and of the respect and fear that his action has elicited in the others; but he got irritated by the fact Kid seemed unaffected by his performance, so he challenged him to do better, and Kid did so. Without losing his calm he hit all the target twice, one time when the cans were on the fence and the second when they were up in the air. Louise had been amazed by Kid's skill, her heart bursting with pride, but the only thing she could do in that moment was to flash a grin in his direction, and now she longed for some moments alone with him.

"_What will Kid think of me after so much time?"_ the girl wondered worriedly. Physically she hadn't changed so much since she was fourteen. Small and thin, she surely wasn't the kind of girl that made boys' heads turn. Plus her manners weren't improved; being always among men, working and hiding, had made her gain attitudes and movements that were not very feminine and ladylike.

The girl sighed, she had never cared about those things before, but now she regretted not having a nice dress on or being prettier. She couldn't blame him if Kid had found another girlfriend during those years apart; Lou continued to repeat to herself, even if her heart sank at that thought.

When she entered in the barn she didn't find Kid in the box of his beloved Katy, as she imagined, but in Lightning's. He was rubbing her softly, talking to her low, as she had seen him do many times with Wicks' horses.

"Kid," she called him.

He turned and smiled sweetly at her.

"Hey," he responded.

For some minutes they weren't able to say anything else. They stood there, silently looking at each other, lingering their glances on every little detail, as they couldn't do before. Lou began to blush under his warm and attentive stare.

"H-here." she blabbed out to break the silence. Since when did she feel so embarrassed with him?

"I brought your things; the foreman gave me them the day I went looking for you." She didn't continue the sentence; she didn't want to remember that day. She lowered her eyes but Kid caressed her cheek and the girl returned her eyes to look at him.

"Thank you Louise." His voice was thick with emotion. He thought he would never see the only keepsake of his childhood he had.

Kid took the photos of his mother and brother stroking them with his fingers for some moments, and then he passed to the letters Lou wrote to him. The girl blushed, reading them again she realized how silly and sentimental they were, but Kid observed them tenderly.

"I have something for you too." He said.

The young man took out of his pocket a letter; it was all wrinkled, because he had kept it there all the day, waiting for the right moment to give it to her.

The letter was written by Jeremiah and Teresa and it was addressed to Kid. In his clumsy childish writing Jeremiah told him they were fine and that they couldn't wait until he came again to visit them; there were also few uncertain lines written by Teresa; the child asked him if he would bring Louise with him the next time.

The letter was dated few weeks before.

Louise sucked her breath, during all those years Kid had never lost touch with her brother and sister nor he stopped looking for her. She began to weep; nobody had ever showed her such devotion…

"Lou, I'm sorry, I didn't want to upset you…" he said, alarmed by her tears. "I just want to let you know that Miah and Tessie are fine and miss you…"

"Please don't get mad," the boy continued when she remained silent "I didn't want to take your place with your brother and sister. I just wanted to help you, that's all."

Lou didn't answer, but she hugged him hard, while her sobs became heavier. Only in that moment she realized how desperately she had missed Kid. He held her, rocking her slowly.

"Promise me…promise me you never leave me alone again…promise…" she said, raising to him her wide, glistening eyes.

"I promise, Louise" he responded in a whisper.

The young man kissed softly her eyelids, her cheeks wet with the tears and then, hesitantly, her lips. Lou abandoned herself against him, all the initial awkwardness was disappeared.

"I missed you Louise, God how much I missed you…" Kid whispered against her hair when he went back to hugging her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

In the following days the six boys – and girl - continued their training and, a couple of weeks after, they were ready to start the first runs. In that period, though, they didn't learn only how to be Pony Express riders, they also began to know each other, to become friends.

Lou and Kid told part of their story, because Cody didn't stop nagging them. They said they were old friends, that they had to separate, and that Kid had been believed dead after an accident. The couple didn't tell anything more and the boys seemed to accept their story without any further question. They got used to the close friendship Kid and Lou shared, considering it as the one existing between Ike and Buck, who came from the same orphanage, and accepting Kid's protectiveness toward Lou as the kind one has for a younger brother.

It didn't take long before they found out the truth, though. It was when Lou decided to go visiting her brother and sister.

It hadn't been an easy decision to take, the girl had never returned to St. Joe since she and the Kid had escaped from Wicks. The thought of coming back to that city still disturbed her but all Kid's talks about Jeremiah and Teresa made her longing for her siblings strong as never before. To hear him talk about how much they had grown in the last years, or what was their favourite dish, or some silly anecdote about the life at the orphanage, made her heart ache with sadness and a bit of envy toward Kid.

For this reason Louise made up her mind to take the first scheduled run towards St Joe. She asked Kid to help her to pick some gifts for Tessie and Miah and, one day when both were free from their duties, Kid accompanied Lou to the nearest town to buy a dress. The girl didn't want her siblings to see her in her masculine disguise; it would be hard enough to explaining them what she was doing without them seeing her dressed as a boy.

°°°°°°

Louise arrived at the orphanage with her stomach tied in knots, Kid told her that Teresa had asked about her every time he went visiting them, but she hinted that Jeremiah, instead, was pretty angry at her, because he thought she had abandoned them. However, her worries about the meeting were replaced by fear when the nuns told her that a tall, slender man called Boggs had threatened them and brought away Jeremiah and Teresa.

Her father had found them.

She returned in Sweetwater with the fear gripping her heart, she didn't know what she could do since she had no idea of where Boggs could have brought them. She was lucky, though. If being lucky was to discover that her own father was behind a gunrunning business that caused, among the other things, an attack to an Express run and Ike's severe wounding.

When Sam Cain, Sweetwater's marshal and Emma's sweetheart, asked to the riders to investigate about those attacks, Lou took her chance to go and rescue her brother and sister. The girl didn't want to involve anyone, not even Kid -who had already hinted something- because she knew how dangerous the man she spent her childhood with could be. So, once they were on the trail, one night she sneaked away from the camp and went to her father's base.

When the riders discovered she disappeared Kid was forced to reveal part of the her story, telling how Lou was afraid that her father was the man they were looking for and that he had abducted her younger brother and sister.

Lou was captured while was trying to sneak into the camp, her father beat her, since he hadn't recognized the small boy sneaking in his camp as her eldest daughter, but Lou refused to reveal the truth and tell him who she really was. She was in really big trouble but Kid and the boys came to her rescue.

While Jimmy, Cody and Buck provided some diversion, setting on fire the gunpowder stocked in the camp, Kid got into the main house, freed Lou and together they went looking for Jeremiah and Teresa.

Louise would never forget the joy on her siblings' faces when they saw Kid. Jeremiah was reluctant to follow her but he immediately listened to the Kid. That hurt her, but she couldn't blame her brother. He hadn't seen her for almost five years, nor had she sent them a letter or anything. Kid, instead, had kept his word and he never lost touch with the children. Now it was up to her to make up for the time lost.

Unfortunately the boys' plan didn't work as they hoped. Jimmy had arrived to help them out of the house, but he was caught off guard by Boggs, who held him at gunpoint, and this forced Kid, Lou and the children to stop.

In the tense moments that followed Boggs' reappearance Lou revealed her true identity, telling Boggs she was his oldest daughter. Poor Jimmy was stunned by her revelation, amazed and astonished that the small but fierce boy that had been living with them for a month was instead a young girl.

Boggs wasn't moved though, he didn't care too much about his daughters, but he wanted Jeremiah and he wouldn't let them go away with him. He was ready to shoot at Louise when she refused to leave his brother with him.

Jimmy sprang into action, then.

He distracted Boggs and, since he was disarmed and he couldn't do very much, he called out for Kid. Boggs fired but Kid was faster and hit the man squarely in the chest.

Boggs died in Lou's arms few moments later.

"I had come for you too." Those were his last words; and now Louise would never know if it was the truth or another of his lies.

That night she looked for comfort in Kid's arms. He stayed by her side when she revealed her true identity to the boys, ready to comfort her if they rejected her; and he talked to Jeremiah, trying to make him understand why her sister had stayed away for so long. But Kid barely looked Lou in the eyes, upset and guilty over killing her father.

In the dim light of the fire, after everybody had turned in for the night, Lou crept in Kid's bedroll. He didn't say anything but hugged her tight, her tears mingled with his own while Kid held her tight against his chest.

°°°°°°

"I should behave as you do!?"

Louise heard the Jimmy's upset voice arguing with Kid. It seemed that the two of them couldn't get along on anything but, by now, their explosive relationship didn't worry her anymore. Everyone had understood that, whatever they said to each other, they could count on each other when they needed.

"What do you mean by that??" she heard Kid respond.

The girl sighed; she had understood the reason behind the fight. Jimmy had met a girl he liked and Lou told the others not to make fun of him and invited her friend to act upon what he felt.

And Lou told Jimmy that also for Kid's sake.

Their relationship wasn't simple; sometimes he seemed to push her but then, when she was ready to follow, it was the Kid the one who would hesitate, leaving her uncertain and confused.

Why couldn't always it be as that evening during the Social Dance?

Kid noticed how Lou was suffering, observing all the other girls dancing in their pretty dresses, so he brought her outside "to get some fresh air". They danced under the stars, he looked at her in that way that made her knees tremble and then they kissed breathlessly.

The young couple was so engrossed in each other that it was caught by a grinning Emma and a very embarrassed Teaspoon. The woman had understood Lou's true nature from the first time she had looked at her, but the grizzled stationmaster was completely unaware of it.

Louise had been frightened because she thought that Teaspoon would fire her, and Kid was ready to leave with her, because he didn't want to lose her again. The older man, though, after a first moment of confusion, assured her he would keep the secret.

"We are family, and family sticks together."

Lou smiled, she remembered the way Teaspoon had looked at her, the first days after her revelation, it was the same way with the boys: a mix of bewilderment and admiration, compassion and worry. But now for everyone she was again simply one of the riders.

"Don't involve Lou in this!" Kid's angry voce distracted her from her reverie.

It wasn't his usual tone. She ran into the barn.

"Don't get mad at me! What is it? Lou doesn't like to dance?? Or you can't give her what she wants?"

Lou saw Kid punch Jimmy hard, throwing him on the ground. He was furious. On her part she was violently blushing, having sensed the real meaning behind Jimmy's words.

"You don't know what you're talking about." Kid seethed.

Jimmy shivered, he had never seen Kid like that; Lou arrived and grabbed him by the arm.

"Kid!" she called, but he didn't loosen the grip on Jimmy's shirt.

"Kid, stop!!" Lou half-shouted, half-sobbed, grabbing him by the waist.

The sound of her voice finally seemed to wake up the young Southerner and he let Lou bring him away from Jimmy.

The girl had hidden her face in his chest and Kid automatically hugged her, he was still trembling for the indignation but Lou's presence calmed him and he slowly lowered his face on her shoulder.

Jimmy remained on the ground, embarrassed. He had gone too far with his words, he realized that now. His friend's tone had irritated him and he had wanted to hurt him. But now, observing the couple embracing, he realized he had crossed a line he shouldn't and he regretted what he said.

"Please, Jimmy, go away." Lou told him behind Kid's shoulder.

The young man nodded sheepishly and exited from the barn, leaving them alone.

°°°°°°

"Why did you say those things?" Kid asked after a while.

"What things?"

"You know what, Lou." He stepped back to look at her in the eyes. "About me taking things too slow. Why did you have to say that?"

He looked slightly hurt and confused, but this irritated Lou. How could he talk in that way? Did he really not understand that his behaviour was making her crazy? One moment he was sweet and loving, the moment after he treated her as if he had forgotten she was a girl at all.

They didn't have the chance to enjoy a real courtship, and this made the things between them quite complicated, but on the other hand they had gone through so much together that she didn't care about the flowers and the treats he couldn't bring her, or the dances they couldn't share at the balls.

What hurt her was the way Kid sometimes seemed to avoid her, that when they have the possibility to be alone, to get closer, he seemed awkward and uncomfortable and more than one time he took the first chance he got to leave her.

Lou screamed at him all what she felt, letting go of all her repressed emotions. Kid's unawareness of all the turmoil he was causing her hurt and irritated her at the same time.

"What's it Kid? I'm not enough for you?" she said with a trembling voice, "Would you prefer one of those pretty girls that are always around you boys?"

The young Southerner had remained silent during all her angry tirade, but at her question he promptly replied.

"You are the prettiest girl I've ever met, I never changed my mind from the first time I saw you."

"Am I?" it was Lou's sarcastic reply. "Then why you don't want to be with me?"

Kid reddened. "I – I don't."

"Damn Kid! Sometimes I think you prefer your horse's company than mine!"

"That's not true, Lou. I love to stay with you."

"Really Kid? Then why you are always on pin and needles when you are with me? And when we start to kiss it always ends with you backing away from me?" her voice was breaking but she continued. "Is it because you know what Wicks did? Is it because I'm dirty…?"

"No Louise! Don't think even for a second something like that!"

"Then why Kid?"

Lou stared at him in the eyes, but Kid didn't respond not even looking at her.

"Ok…I've understood…" her voice was barely a whisper. "I've always known that Wicks will come between us sooner or later…" she added bitterly.

"I…I think it's better we part now…" a tear fell down her cheek and she turned to leave.

Kid's heart stopped at her words.

"Lou!" he exclaimed, scared.

He took the girl by the arm and made her face him again. He held her tight against him and then he kissed her hard, pushing her lips open and sliding his tongue in her mouth.

Louise was shocked; he had never kissed her so passionately, so thoroughly. His left hand went on the nape of her neck; the other was holding her tight against his hips. The girl was feeling dizzy; overwhelmed by the sensation he was giving her. This wasn't one of the sweet kisses they used to share.

Suddenly she began to feel his arousal against her stomach and pushed him away roughly.

Kid stared at her panting, his eyes burning with a myriad of emotion.

"This is the reason Lou," he said "I want to make love with you, Louise. Every time we are alone, every time we get close, It gets harder and harder not to sweep you off your feet, kiss you kiss you like that and make you mine."

Lou stared at him wordlessly, one trembling hand covering her lips.

Kid saw her scared expression and immediately regretted what he did. That was the reason he kept restraining himself when he was with her. The young man would never forget the look she had when they ran away from St Joe, when she couldn't come close to anyone without trembling; and to see again the same look, even if for less than a second, broke his heart.

"I'll never do such a thing ever again, Lou, I promise you."

The girl nodded, she felt like she was melting inside under his heated stare, and this scared her.

"It's better…it's better you go away now, Kid."

It was the only thing she could manage to say. She watched him exit and then her knees gave way and she sank on the ground.


	7. Chapter 7

**The Only Thing**

**by Daydreamer P.**

_As ever, thank you to my beta Ellie and to Mercy and Endzi. I'm happy you liked the previous chapter, I had a little trouble writing it. I hope you'll enjoy this one too._

_Bye!_

_Paola_

**Chapter 7**

Kid wanted to make love with her.

Lou sank on the ground, stunned by that unexpected revelation. She never imagined that her Kid could desire her in that way.

How could have been so naïve?

She had lived enough time among men to know what most of them usually look for in a girl. Damn! She had learned it in the worst way possible! Still she never thought of him wanting to make love with her.

She had fantasized a lot about marrying him one day; but it was something very far away. One day, when the Pony Express ended), Kid would ask her to became his wife and she would accept with all of her heart; then – during their wedding night- he would show her what it really meant to be loved by a man. But for now she was content with the kisses and the embraces they shared, and she thought that it was the same for Kid.

Instead he wanted her, wanted her now.

Louise felt almost betrayed by the young man's feelings. She had always felt safe and protected being in his arms. And now, thinking that in those same moments Kid was fighting his own arousal made a rush of shame redden her cheeks.

Everything was so confused.

She always thought she was not ready to be intimate with Kid. But then, what was that sweet pain she felt inside of her? That quivering that had made her want to lose herself in his arms, even if only for a moment?

Overwhelmed by those strong emotions, Louise burst into tears, unable to comprehend the turmoil in her heart.

°°°°°°

When she finally returned to the bunkhouse, she was relieved to find that her bunkmates had already turned in for the night. She undressed quickly and then she climbed on her bed, careful not to disturb the Kid.

In the dark she could make out his back, he was sleeping facing the wall. More probably he was only pretending but Louise feigned to believe him, because she couldn't face him now.

Her heart ached for that situation, she never felt uncomfortable with Kid, not even in the worst moments; but now, his revelation made her feel as if she didn't know him anymore.

°°°°°°

_The thirteen year old Louise was curled in a ball in a corner of her little room. The voice of Mr Wicks was becoming more insistent and menacing. Her eyes darted from the small window –her only chance to escape- to the rattling doorknob, that the man outside was shaking furiously._

_Suddenly the door burst open. She gulped, terrified, but the man who came in wasn't Wicks, it was Kid._

_Louise was stunned; she began to raise herself from the floor. The young man's gentle hand helped her and the girl was engulfed in his warm embrace. His blue eyes shone with such love and passion that her heart began to beat fast in her chest, and when he claimed her lips with his own, Lou felt a wave of heat starting in her lower belly and spreading all over her body._

_Kid lowered her on the bed; Louise felt his weight pinning her on the bed and a soft sigh escaped from her lips. His hands crept under her clothes, burning her bare skin._

"_I love you." Kid said._

Lou woke up suddenly, her heart beating wildly in her chest. She found herself looking at the wall in the dim light of the first morning. She felt unreasonably hot and again there was that feeling of melting inside.

The bed swayed a little, Kid was getting up, and Lou shut her eyes close.

She heard him dressing silently, careful not to make too much noise. At a certain point the girl sensed him looking at her. Usually he gave her a quick peck on the head when he had a run early in the morning and they couldn't kiss goodbye properly, but this time he simply kept staring at her and Lou forced herself to stay as still as possible.

"C'mon Kid, Emma left some breakfast for us in the main house." Cody whispered.

Kid sighed and followed his friend outside.

Lou opened again her eyes, drawing a deep sigh. She rolled on her back and stared at the ceiling.

Kid's proximity had unnerved her, filling her stomach with butterflies, the memory of her dream still fresh on her mind. It has begun as a horrible nightmare and then it changed into something very pleasurable.

She was so terrified at the beginning, reliving the horrible night when Wicks stole her innocence, but then she enjoyed feeling Kid touching her, and this scared her.

She still could feel that tingling sensation on her skin and a soft liquid pain in her belly. What was happening to her? She felt those things because she was good "only for one thing" as Wicks told her that night? Because she wasn't a decent girl …?

Lou's eyes filled with tears for the umpteenth time since the evening before. What was wrong with her?

°°°°°°

The girl spent the remaining last hour of sleep tossing and turning in her bed, and she woke up with a bad headache and an even worse temper. Her bunkmates immediately acknowledged her mood and –wisely- they decided to let her be. By now they had learned that Lou can be the most caring girl ever but also that when she was in a bad mood she could bite your head off just for saying 'Hello' in the wrong way.

Buck and Ike shook their heads.

"_Women"_ Ike signed when Lou wasn't looking at him.

The two friends grinned, amused, thinking that the cause of Lou's scowl was Kid's absence; but Jimmy didn't share their mirth. He was still guilty for what had happened the evening before and he sensed that his nasty words were somehow the cause of Lou's bad mood.

Emma sent the two of them into town to take back some supplies but the girl barely spoke a word during the entire trip. Jimmy was very uncomfortable with the current situation. He knew he hadn't showed the respect that his female friend deserved, but Jimmy never thought that his remark would cause such a commotion.

Lou had always seemed to him perfectly at ease living with the guys and, considering the times they disappeared to 'check the horses' or 'take a walk' and the times they all caught Lou sleeping in the same bunk with Kid, Jimmy had supposed things that probably weren't true.

The young man threw a glance to the small brunette near riding near him. She was wearing her usual surly expression that signalled to all of them that she wasn't in a talking a mood, but her eyes were sad and red-rimmed and she had dark circles under her eyes that spoke of a bad night.

Suddenly a wave of affection rushed over Jimmy's chest. He never gave a thought about how hard must be for Lou living as a boy when instead she was very much a girl, a girl in love indeed.

"Lou" he called softly.

The girl merely glanced at him.

"Lou, I'm sorry for yesterday. I didn't want to make Kid so upset…you know how heated things can get between me and your guy, but really, I didn't want to offend either of you."

Lou didn't say a word and Jimmy stopped, unsure.

Rationally Lou knew that what happened wasn't Jimmy's fault; but she couldn't help but think that if he hadn't said those words that she and Kid wouldn't have had that fateful argument.

"It's Ok Jimmy," she said dismissively.

The gunslinger wasn't convinced though.

"You don't look ok to me, Lou. Did something happen between you and the Kid?"

"Look Jimmy, I said I'm ok and –anyway- whatever else happened yesterday is not your business."

She rebutted irritably and then she spurred her horse, leaving an astonished and angered Jimmy behind.

"Do as you like! I was only tryin' to help!" he shouted at her.

Louise heard his shout but she didn't turn. What could she say to him, anyway? That Kid wanted to make love with her and this scared the hell outta her? Or maybe she should talk about the feeling that his revelation had stirred inside of her?

How could Louise say to him that she was raped when she was only a little girl and that she still felt terribly guilty and somewhat responsible for what happened?

Later that day Lou went to Jimmy to apologize, but still she didn't say anything. She appreciated his concern; she got to learn that under his tough appearance Jimmy Hickock had a caring soul. But she didn't feel she could talk with him about that issue.

Actually Louise didn't know with whom she could talk.

Teaspoon? All the boys went to him for advice but, as much as she cared about him and trusted his judgement, he was a man and he couldn't understand her.

Emma? The station-mistress was like an older sister and a mother to her; but she seemed so decent and proper that Lou felt ashamed to talk to her about her past and about her confused feelings.

Charlotte, dear Charlotte. Lou thought that a bit of sadness that her friend would probably comprehend her better than anyone else. But the woman still worked in Wicks' brothel and Lou couldn't write her.

The following days were quite trying for the girl's poor bunkmates. Lou's mood was awful and the boys couldn't wait for Kid's return. Their blue-eyed sweet-talking friend would be able to calm her or –at least- he would be the target of the girl's flaring temper.

Lou, on her part, knew she was acting horrible but she couldn't help herself. Irrationally she was angry with the boys, and envious of them.

Boys hadn't so many problems as the girls, especially about issues like sex. They were supposed to have some experiences in that matter, and nobody blamed them for that; the girls instead, must be pure and unsoiled.

Those were the girls who got married and had people's respect, but girls like her…spoiled girls, they were the ones the men used. Was it the reason Kid wanted her? Because he couldn't see her as a proper lady?

No! Her Kid wasn't like this! The pained look he gave her that evening, told her that he would prefer to die than to hurt her, and that having scared her had broken his heart. Kid would wait for her until she felt ready, Lou knew that, but this didn't change the fact that he desired her, and she didn't know how to deal with his feelings.

Louise sighed heavily and leaned on the bale of hay she was sitting against. The girl was in the hayloft where she took refuge. Kid and Cody were supposed to come back in the morning but it was almost dinnertime and they still hadn't arrived. The girl was a jumble of nerves and she wanted to spare her fellow riders her temper, at least this time.

In fact, despite all the uneasiness existing between them, Lou was worried sick about Kid. Since the day they met again, the girl felt the need to have him around or to know exactly where he was, and now he was late and the area where he and Cody had gone was one they seldom visited and they knew very little about, and she couldn't stop thinking of all the bad things that could have happened to him.

When she finally heard the usual "Rider Comin'!" Louise sprang on her feet and leaned to the hayloft's open door to see the upcoming riders.

There was something wrong though.

There were two horses but only one rider. Cody was leading Katy and Kid was nowhere to see.

Lou's felt as if her heart was squeezed by a vise. She scrambled down the ladder and ran where the others were gathering around Cody. Everyone turned to look at her but she held her gaze on the blonde guy who was looking at her helplessly.

"I'm sorry, Lou." he said. "Kid is missing."


	8. Chapter 8

**THE ONLY THING**

**by DayDreamer P.**

_Hello! I'm sorry for making you wait so much for these new chapters. I hope you still remember this story of mine! ;-)_

_Good Reading!_

**Chapter 8**

"What the hell do you mean 'Kid is missing'!?" Lou barked.

She knew she had been too aggressive but the tension and the worries of the previous days had finally made her snap. Cody took a step back at the girl's outburst.

"Well Lou," he began, "we were in this town called Prosperity and we- we got separated and then when I came back to him I discovered the marshal had arrested Kid because he had tried to cheat."

"What?!" Lou whimpered. "Kid would never do something like that!"

"I know that Lou," the blond rider agreed with her. "And that's what Kid told me when I found him in the jail. The marshal told me he would keep him for the night but when I came back the morning after, he said that Kid had already left town."

"Kid? Leave town without you? That's impossible!" Jimmy exclaimed, Cody's story was too strange, there must be something more behind it.

"I know." Cody sighed defeated, "That's why I ran back here."

"Damn you Cody! To ride double means to watch each other's back! Why the hell did you leave Kid alone!"

The girl was growing angrier by the minute, in other circumstances it would have been funny to see Cody squirm in front of that spitfire of a girl that Lou was, but in that moment there wasn't anything to laugh about. Kid was missing and they had to discover what happened to him.

Buck laid a hand on the girl's shoulder. "Calm down now, Lou. Getting angry won't solve anything."

Lou glared menacingly at the Kiowa rider but she stopped her tirade. "Let's go call Teaspoon," she said crossly.

When they were finally all gathered around the station manager Cody, who looked as guilty as sin, began to talk.

"As I said before, we were in this town called Prosperity and we decided to stop in a saloon to get something to drink." He didn't specify that he had been the one who dragged Kid in that city and in that saloon because the Southerner didn't want to go.

"Well, in that saloon we got separated and…"

"What do you mean with 'we got separated'?" Teaspoon inquired.

Cody would have preferred to skip that part but the old man's glare gave him no choice. He sighed.

"Ok, I went with a girl and left Kid alone." He said all in one breath. "But Teaspoon, Kid was just drinking a sarsaparilla when I went upstairs, and he can take care of himself! It's not my fault if he got in trouble!"

In a certain way Cody was right. There were no rules about being with a girl in the company and Kid wasn't a child and he didn't need a guardian. But this didn't change the fact that he was missing. Teaspoon sighed heavily.

"Ok Cody. It isn't your fault, nobody is accusing you," he said even if Lou's glare said something different. "Now, please, would you explain exactly what happened from the moment you got back to the saloon until the morning they told you Kid had gone away?"

Cody nodded. "When I came back in the saloon Kid was nowhere to be seen so I thought that maybe he got tired of waiting for me and returned to the livery, but he wasn't there. I began to look for him in the town, but nobody seemed to remember him, not even at the saloon. And that was very strange, if I can say that. Finally a woman called Tulsa told me that he was accused of cheating, and the marshal had arrested him.

"Then I went to jail and the marshal told me the same thing, but Kid denied it. He said he stepped in because the dealerwanted to cheat one of the women in the saloon, but he got a punch in the face and an accusation."

"Knowing the Kid, it is what probably happened." Teaspoon sighed, "the saloon owner and the marshal must have some sort of dealing and Kid got caught in the middle. This doesn't explain the fact he's disappeared, though. It doesn't make sense."

"Ah, I forgot something. Katy wasn't in the livery when I came back the morning after. I almost believed he'd gone home without me, but then Tulsa, brought me to where they'd hidden Katy."

Tulsa seemed scared, but she said was the woman Kid helped so she wanted to help me back. She didn't say where they brought Kid, but I'm sure she knows. All she told me was that my friend wasn't there anymore, everyone told me the same thing, but I don't think it's the truth."

"Kid would never left the town without saying anything to you, let alone without Katy." Jimmy reasoned. "This situation reeks, we have to find out what's happening in that town."

Lou sat huddled near the campfire. They went to Sam to explain what happened to Kid, and the marshal could only confirm their suspicions about the town of Prosperity. There had been numerous other disappearances in that town, even the agent that the territorial marshal sent to investigate had disappeared without a trace.

Lou's stomach was tied in knots; since they had discovered about Kid, she wasn't able to eat more than a few bites, let alone sleep properly. The night before she had a horrible nightmare. She was in the building site where she thought she had lost Kid. The foreman had Teaspoon's face and was telling her that Kid was disappeared; then the scene shifted and Lou found herself on a riverbank. There was the body of a drowned man and when she turned to look at him she saw Kid's blue eyes staring sightlessly at her, he had been shot in the chest.

Lou had woken up screaming his name and she couldn't sleep since then; also now, after an entire day in the saddle, she couldn't close her eyes, afraid of her nightmare.

"Damn you Kid," she thought. "If you aren't all right when we'll find you I swear I-I…" Lou couldn't continue and burst in tears.

Cody looked at her from his bedroll on the other side of the campfire. The day before she had almost bitten his head off; but now, seeing her so worried and anguished, the blonde rider felt terribly guilty. Lou must care very much about Kid, he realized how much only in that moment; and because of his stupid idea now Kid was missing. Cody wanted to comfort her somehow, but he had never been good at that type of thing. He also didn't know if Lou was still angry at him. So he kept staring at the girl, silently hoping for Kid to be all right.

The blonde man wasn't the only one who was looking at Lou, also Jimmy laid sleeplessly on the ground, in some part feeling guilty for that situation too. Kid and Lou had a big fight because of what he told the Southerner and, if something irreparable had happened to Kid, Lou would never forgive herself for not saying goodbye to him one last time.

The morning after, Sam and the boys finally reached Prosperity. They felt the same atmosphere Cody talked about, the city seemed nice, but the people looked afraid of something, tension and fear were underneath the pretty surface, but nobody was willing to acknowledge it.

When Sam went to the marshal the man repeated the same story he told Cody. He kept Kid in jail for the night because he had tried to cheat, and the morning after he had released him and the boy had left town. Sam wasn't taken in by the man's tale, he pretended to believe him, but sent the boys to look around the town and the outskirts as soon as he left the marshal's office.

"Look that woman over there, Lou! She's Tulsa!"

Cody and Lou were walking in the main street of the town, the girl had insisted that Cody would bring her in the saloon where Kid was arrested, the young man didn't think it was a good idea, but he agreed to accompany her.

They were almost arrived when Cody noticed Tulsa; she wasn't wearing a scanty saloon dress as the first time he saw her, she was properly dressed in a black gown with a matching hat. She was with that small creepy man called Whitcomb who was the Mayor of Prosperity. The man had a satisfied grin on his face, but Tulsa looked quite sad and upset. When she noticed Cody the woman looked at him intensely, but she didn't say nothing, shaking imperceptibly her head before disappearing inside the saloon after Whitcomb.

Cody stopped at the woman's gesture, halting Lou too.

"Why did you stop me! We had to talk to that woman! It was you who said that she knew where Kid is!"

"We can't go now. She wouldn't talk if that man is with her. He's the Mayor, and I'm sure he's behind all of this."

They went back to the meeting place they had outside the town, hoping that the others had found out something more interesting. They had, indeed. But it wasn't good news. They discovered that Kid was kept in a sort of labor camp not far away. People were forced to work in a mine under the menace of armed men.

"Kid is there, Lou." Jimmy said, looking sympathetically at the girl. "He doesn't look so bad."

He couldn't say to her that Kid looked as if he had been badly beaten. There was no reason to worry her more than she already was.

They laid back, waiting for the moment when the prisoner would be brought back to the barracks where they were held during the night. The armed men weren't many and Sam was confident he and boys would overcome them easily if they attacked by surprise. And in fact, the attack lasted few minutes, and the men were fast surrounded and disarmed.

While holding one of the outlaws at gunpoint, Lou frantically looked over the prisoners that had thrown themselves on the ground to escape the gunfight. Finally she spotted Kid. Heavy chains were at his wrists and legs, he was covered in dirt and he had a huge gash on his brow and bruises on his face. Lou's heart was wrung with worry. What did they do to Kid?

He looked at him and all she could blurt out was:

"You look terrible."

When instead she would have given anything to run to him and embrace him tight.

They freed the prisoners and locked the guardians in the barracks, but it wasn't finished. Kid insisted they had to come back in town to catch the one responsible for everything: Whitcomb. He looked deadly pale under the dirt and the bluish shade of his bruises, but the young man didn't want to stay back and rest as a worried Lou had suggested.

Kid wanted justice. In those few days he had been in that hell he saw how the greed and the evil of a few people could steal the freedom and even the dignity of a man. Kid had seen two men hung without reason: the guards had killed his fellow prisoner Hinton, only to frame him for the murder and Richard killed himself because all his dreams and hopes had been destroyed. Kid couldn't let Whitcomb get away with that, he felt he need to avenge those two men and all the others who suffered because of him.

In town they engaged in a brief gunfight with the corrupt marshal and his men and then Kid ran for Whitcomb. He wasn't feeling well, but ignored the sharp pain that shot through his abdomen with every breath he took, he climbed up the stairs where he saw the Mayor go, but Tulsa was faster.

The woman was Richard's wife. She and her husband were living happily in that city, her husband had a mine and the business were going well, until Whitcomb arrived. First he took the control of the bank, then he became the Mayor. Little by little he and his men spread their power over Prosperity, and without even being aware of how, Richard became a prisoner of his own mine and Tulsa was forced to work in the saloon. As the last straw Whitcomb forced her to become his woman and Tulsa had to accept his proposal because Richard's life was in his hands; but doing destroyed the last hope of the man she loved.

She shot Whitcomb in cold blood, while he was trying to take all the money he had hidden. The woman observed his lifeless body falling on the ground without even any remorse. She remained looking at the corpse until she heard someone approaching.

She turned toward the door and saw that nice boy who got in trouble because of her. Tulsa had felt responsible for his fate too.

"It's all over, now." She told him.

The boy nodded, he opened his mouth as if to say something, but suddenly he paled and fell unconscious on the ground.


	9. Chapter 9

**THE ONLY THING**

**by Daydreamer P.**

**Chapter 9**

Tulsa saw Kid fell on the ground unconscious and immediately went to him. He was white as a sheet and his breath was slow and labored. The woman touched his abdomen and a deep painful moan escaped from his lips. Rapidly she opened his shirt: there wasn't any open wound, but the abdomen was tense and bluish and clear signs of kicks marked his skin.

"Kid!" someone exclaimed.

Tulsa raised her head and saw the boy's friends; the small young boy that she had seen before with the blond rider she had already met kneeled near Kid, running his fingers lightly on Kid's face. It took just few moments and Tulsa understood that the small boy was indeed a girl; and from the anguished and pained look in her eyes, a girl who cared very much about Kid.

"I'll go to call the doctor." She said then and hurried down the stairs.

Nobody seemed to notice that, a few steps from Kid, there was the lifeless body of Whitcomb; and Tulsa didn't give a second thought about him. She was sure that nobody would blame her for his death.

When the doctor arrived, he quickly examined the young man, palpating him all over his abdomen and nodding tensely when Kid moaned.

"He has broken some ribs. Where's a bed where we could lay him?" He asked.

Tulsa showed him the room next door, which had been hers since she began to work in the saloon. It was small, but neat and clean.

Jimmy and Cody transported Kid to the bed and then exited to let the doctor tend to his wounds.

"Don't worry, Lou." The young gunslinger said. "You heard what the doctor said, Kid just broke a couple of ribs. Few weeks of rest and he will be as good as new."

Jimmy winked, trying to comfort her, but the girl didn't say a word. She had continued to stare at the close door with big scared eyes since the moment the doctor entered and she just nodded at Jimmy's words.

"I'll go to check the others, so we can clean this mess." Cody murmured to the brown-haired guy. "You stay with her."

The blond rider looked worriedly at Lou, he would have liked to go to her and say how sorry he was about what happened but, once again, he couldn't find the right words. He squeezed the girl's shoulder comfortingly, and then he went to look for Sam, Buck and Ike.

After a time that seemed infinite to Lou, the doctor finally exited from the room. Immediately the girl sprung on her feet.

"Doc?" that worried question was everything she could manage to say. She squeezed Jimmy's hand spasmodically, not caring about giving away her disguise.

"How's the Kid, doc?" Jimmy repeated.

"Your friend suffered of what we call hemothorax." The older man responded. "He broke some ribs and the splinters had damaged some of his internal organs and caused haemorrhaging. The blood pressing on his lungs prevented his normal breathing. I've drained the excess blood and bandaged his abdomen to immobilize his ribcage. Now the only thing we can do is to wait for his body to heal by itself and keep my suture clean. Your friend didn't lost too much blood so, if he didn't develop any infection, he will be OK in a couple of weeks."

Lou was so relieved at his words that she felt her knees almost gave way. She didn't understand all of his medical talking but the doctor said he eventually will be ok and this was enough for her.

"Can I see him?" she asked in whisper.

Lou damped the cloth with the liniment the doctor gave her and then smeared it on the bruised areas on Kid's chest. Three days had passed and the other riders had gone back to Sweetwater with Sam, but Lou had remained with Kid. Tulsa offered Lou her place so the girl could assist Kid until he got better. Fortunately, Kid didn't develop the feared infection and that morning he had finally woken up, even if just for some moments.

Lou massaged his shoulder and chest with the liniment, thanks to her constant care his bruises were rapidly healing. She lightly caressed his cheek, when he had opened his eyes, that morning, Lou felt like crying with joy and relief. It had been just for a moment, just a flickering of his eyes and a smile in her direction, and Lou was positive that he wouldn't even remember it later; but the important thing was that the doctor had visited him and was pleased to find that the healing process was going well, affirming that the Kid needed just a little more rest to finally wake up completely.

Lou was obviously happy, but she couldn't help but feel a little anxious too. The memory of their last fight and the unexpected way he showed his feelings still lingered between them and the girl didn't exactly know how she was supposed to behave.

She wasn't angry with him, she never had been, but she still was uncomfortable. In those days she tended him, Louise had the chance to reflect about what Kid had revealed, and about the feelings his words had stirred.

At first she had been shocked and scared because she would have never expected something like that from his sweet and levelheaded Kid; then she became confused by the longing that his passionate kiss and touch had evoked in her.

She had spent long hours watching Kid's sleeping figure, rubbing the liniment on his wounds, changing his bandages, wiping away the sweat on his face when he was feverish and cleaning him softly with a damp cloth. At first she was embarrassed, because to look at him when he was so vulnerable and unaware of her stare didn't seem right to her, but at the same time Louise found herself unable to stop doing that.

She found herself staring at him more and more and not only for 'medical' reason as well as she found herself running her finger on his warm, soft skin not only to nurse him, but just to feel the sweet quivering that that simple gesture made surge inside of her. Lou didn't want to think about what all of that meant, if it was right or wrong for her to feel those things, if it was proper or not; right now she wanted only to enjoy those sensations.

Everything started the first night she helped Kid. Tulsa let her sleep in the same room with him and gave her a simple cotton nightgown so she would be more comfortable. During the night Kid's fever rose and he began to moan and toss, awakening Louise, who was sleeping on the armchair she had pulled near the bed. The girl got scared, because she thought that the fever was a sign of the dreaded infection; if that was true, then Kid's life could be in danger. She knew that a lot of people died of what the doctor called "septic shock" and she knew it happened when the wound wasn't well cleaned or when the bullet remained inside; but Kid had no bullet and the doctor had tended Kid himself, pouring alcohol on the incision he made.

She had kneeled near him then, pushing away the blankets and exposing Kid's abdomen.. Louise lit the lamp and unwrapped the bandages to look at the suture. Fortunately it wasn't particularly red or swollen so the girl had drawn a breath of relief. Lucille Sutton had taught to her how to tend wounds and Lou knew that, if they 'didn't get angry' -as the widow used to say- then there wasn't any infection. Probably the fever was caused only by the shock and the stress Kid's body had endured.

Louise had quickly put some more liniment on the suture and re-wrapped the bandages. When she noticed he was covered in sweat she had taken the basin on the nightstand and lightly dampened his skin. Kid had only the lower half of his long-johns on and the girl couldn't help blushing, when touching him like this. The girl had stepped back from the bed, unsure, but when Kid began to shiver, she immediately returned to him, covering him with the blankets.

"Lou…" Kid called her, "Lou…I'm sorry…I'm so sorry Lou…" He probably was having a nightmare.

He seemed so helpless and in pain that she slid in the bed with him and without thinking embraced him tightly to soothe him, lightly kissing him on the forehead. Every time Kid had taken her in her arms, or they had slept together, Lou had always felt safe and comfortable, but now, the thought of sharing a bed with him, with just few layers of cotton separating them, had unnerved her, starting the well known quivering. But Louise was too concerned with Kid's well-being to worry about herself, so she remained there, rocking him until she fell asleep.

If the first day Lou had spent assisting Kid, she had chastely looked away when the doctor and Tulsa tended him, limiting herself to dampening his forehead and calling the others if something was wrong; that night had left Louise with an unexpected need to feel Kid as close as possible so she begun to nurse and tend him personally and got into the habit of sleeping with him at night.

Also now, after checking the doctor and Tulsa were away, Lou laid herself in the bed near Kid, draping her slender arm on his torso carefully so as not to hurt him and letting herself lulled into sleep by his warmth and his relaxed breath.

The crack of the door startled Lou and she opened her eyes wide. She saw Tulsa and the doctor on the threshold and rapidly she got up, blushing furiously. She was sleeping embracing a half naked man, what would they think of her?

"Kid is doing better this morning,…" she muttered uneasily. "I…I'll go get some fresh water." and then she dashed out of the room, unable to meet the others' eyes.

Tulsa smiled slightly at Louise's antics; the girl was clearly in love with Kid but she still was so naïve and uncertain. Tulsa was moved, and reminded of how she felt all those years ago, when she first met her Richard.

Louise didn't come back in the room after the doctor left, she felt too embarrassed to confront anyone right now, so she stayed out of the way until Tulsa came to look for her.

"Louise…" she called for her. "Louise? Don't you want to know what the doctor said about Kid?"

Lou exited from Lightning's stall and nodded sheepishly.

"What's that face, Lou? The doctor said the Kid is going better and better and he could wake up any moment now:"

"Thank you Tulsa, that's good news." The girl breathed relieved.

"Tulsa," she added after some moments. "I'm sorry for what happened before. I promise it won't happen again."

"What? Getting caught hugging a handsome sleeping guy?" she winked, but when she saw her mortified expression, the woman quickly reassured her.

"Sweetheart." She said, "there isn't anything wrong in what you did."

"Well…it isn't very proper…"

"Louise, when you care for someone, there there's no proper or improper. There's only what you feel and what you think is right. Follow your heart and you can't do anything wrong."

"And if my heart is confused?"

"What do you mean? You aren't sure of your feelings for Kid?"

"No, not unsure…sometimes I'm scared." Lou admitted.

She didn't know why, but she felt comfortable talking with Tulsa. Maybe it was because she somewhat reminded her of Charlotte.

"Scared?" Tulsa frowned. "Did Kid do something to scare you?"

During the brief time Tulsa spent with him, Kid had seemed to her a nice guy, polite and caring enough to come on defense of a woman he had just met, only because she was being harassed. He was the kind of gentleman type, quite rare around there. For this reason Tulsa found it difficult to imagine Kid doing something to scare the girl or pressing her in something she didn't want; but at the same time she knew boys his age could be clumsy and unable to express their feelings. Maybe Kid had just showed her a bit too 'strongly' how much he cared.

"No…well yes, but that's not the problem, not anymore anyway. It's that when I'm with Kid I feel things and I don't know if they are proper."

Tulsa smiled slightly; she had understood what the girl was talking about.

"I don't know how things are between you and your boyfriend, and I can't say to you what to do. All I can say is to be careful, because heart's matters can hurt you more than anything else. But, if you're sure of what you both feel, and you're ready to face the consequences of your actions, then if you decide to give yourself to someone you love, it doesn't make you a lesser person, no matter what people say."

Kid opened slowly his eyes. His eyelids felt heavy like lead and his mind was still confused. What's happened? He remembered his friends coming to his rescue and him chasing Whitcomb. He saw his lifeless body on the ground and then it was all darkness and pain. But there had been someone who had relieved him from that pain, who had taken care of him for all the time. He still could feel a gentle hand caressing his skin and a sweet embrace surrounding him.

His glance fell on a small hand clutching his bigger one: Lou.

His heart fluttered, she had been the one who never left his side. After his improper advances she still cared about him enough to nurse him to health.

"Lou…" he whispered, squeezing softly her hand.

The girl heard Kid's faint voice calling her name and raised her head.

"Lou, please forgive me…" he said with a raspy voice. "I swear I'll never do such a thing to you never again…"

Kid had such a pained and sorrowful expression on his face that it tore at her heart. He couldn't finish his sentence though, because Lou suddenly covered his lips with her own.

"Hush Kid…hush, you're nothing to be sorry about…"

Now that she finally could see again his eyes, the girl released all the tension and the worries she didn't realize had built up in her, until that moment. She began to cry, hugging Kid tightly around his neck.

"You never scare me again like that, you hear me. I already thought I lost you once and I couldn't bear if it happened again…"

Kid felt his eyes prickling with tears while he hugged Lou back.

After a while Lou raised again her head, looking at Kid with a solemn expression before lowering herself again and kissing him fully on the lips. She didn't exactly how to do it, but she tried to put all her passion and the love she had for Kid in that kiss, as he did that fateful evening.

The young man was taken aback, but let Lou take the lead and when she deepened the kiss he followed her. Lou shifted until she was partly laying to him, her finger running gently through his thick, curly hair, while Kid tightened the hold on her waist keeping her close. Unlike the previous time, Louise didn't get scared by his possessive gesture, instead she was delighted and a faint moan escaped from her lips.

That sound woke up Kid from the blissful daze that Lou's closeness had caused. He gently pushed her back, breaking the kiss.

"Lou, please stop…" he moaned.

She got off him, worried she might have hurt him.

"Kid, I'm sorry, did I hurt you?"

The man glanced again at her, his passion filled gaze made her shiver.

"It's not that Lou…I won't be able to stop if we continued like this." He said with a pained voice, his face flushed.

"Oh…" the girl blushed as well, a hand covering her mouth.

Kid looked away mortified.

"I don't want to break my promise…"

Lou took his hand in hers and brought it to her lips.

"You promised you never would do something to scare me…and I wasn't scared."

Kid looked at her surprised, the girl's voice had a peculiar quality he never heard before, and her dark eyes were sparkling with something he recognized as desire.

"Lou?" he asked uncertain.

But her response was cut off by the doctor's untimely arrival.

"Oh well, I see you finally get up, Kid."

Lou stepped back to give the doctor some room.

"How are you feeling, son?"

"As if someone has trampled on me." he said jokingly. "But I feel much better now, thank you." he hurried to add, seeing Lou's alarmed face.

"It's not me you have to thank, then. This lovely miss here did all the work, she never left your side."

Louise blushed slightly at the doctor's praise, but Kid squeezed her hand gratefully.

"When can I go back home, doc?" he asked.

"Oh...oh" the man laughed heartily. "In such a hurry to get out of here, boy? Don't worry, if everything is fine you and Louise can leave in three days."


	10. Chapter 10

**THE ONLY THING**

**by Daydreamer P.**

**Chapter 10**

"Kid, you ok?"

The young man smiled at that question, he had lost the count of the times Lou had asked him that since they had left Prosperity.

The couple had ridden slowly, taking the most comfortable routes, since the doctor had given them permission to leave only if Kid took the trip easy. The internal wounds could re-open if he wasn't careful, so the kind, old man made Kid wear a bandage wrapped tightly around his torso and put on a liniment every day.

Kid had been delighted when he was told he could leave, since he couldn't bear anymore being cooped up in bed, so he quickly agreed to all the doctor's recommendations. What he didn't expect was Lou being so adamant in following what the doctor ordered. She continued to fuss over him during the entire trip: grooming Katy for him, making them stop every time -in her opinion- he looked tired, changing his bandages and nursing his wound every night.

He never expected Lou to be such a mother hen and, even if it was a bit suffocating from time to time, he was secretly pleased about all the concern and care she was showing; at the same time, Kid felt a little guilty, since he knew that his sudden disappearance must have scared and worried her a lot, especially considering how Lou had already believed him dead in the past.

"Kid, are you listening?" Lou's slightly annoyed voice distracted him from his reverie. "Are you ok? Do you want to stop?" she asked again when Kid turned toward her.

"Don't worry," he responded with a soft smile, "I can ride a little more."

The girl examined him, looking for any sign of tiredness, and only when she was sure she nodded her approval.

"Ok…we can reach the Morris Creek then, it isn't too far," she decided.

* * *

"Lou, there's no need for you to even do this. I can clean up by myself, don't worry about me…"

Kid was trying to protest but the girl was adamant, without even giving a sign she had heard him, she began to unbutton his shirt.

"Kid, would you please stop moving?" she scolded him as if he were five years old. "The doctor said you had to keep the stitches cleaned and you aren't helping me in this way."

"But Lou, you've already set up the camp. You should rest. Let me…"

He could finish his sentence, when Lou finally unwrapped his torso; the young man exhaled deeply, feeling a pulsating throb spreading all over his abdomen and chest. The bandage he had to wear kept him from moving his already damaged ribs but at the same time entrapped him in a sort of cage that left him sore and breathless.

"C'mon, lay back. I'll take care of you," the girl said soothingly, taking a cloth and beginning to cleanse his skin.

"Is that a proposal, Lou?" Kid said, his tone tentatively teasing.

"Maybe," she responded, looking at him behind her long lashes.

They had never talked again about what the doctor had interrupted the day Kid woke up, but the tension was palpable. They flirted even before Prosperity but now there was a flickering in Lou's dark eyes that Kid had never seen before. Something that excited and made him wonder at the same time.

He closed his eyes, relaxed by Lou's delicate touch and the aromatic scent of the liniment. He had left Sweetwater with a heavy heart, knowing he had scared and upset the person he cared about the most in the world. But Lou had forgiven him, had come to his rescue, had taken care of him and, what was more important, in her eyes there was no sign of fear anymore; and this made him so grateful and full of love for her that his heart ached.

"Done," she said and Kid opened his eyes to see her smile.

"Lou…" he called her softly.

He brought one of her small hands to his lips, kissing her fingers lightly.

"Thank you," Kid said, looking in her eyes. "For everything."

She shrugged her shoulders, as if to dismiss the entire matter, but the tender embarrassed look she gave him, told an entirely different story.

"I meant that, Lou. I don't know what I would have done without you."

"Stop with this silliness, Kid." she said even more embarrassed. "You're the one you saved me firstly, remember? I don't know what would have become of me without you."

Kid shook his head, continuing to look at her.

"I'm sure you'd have overcome everything, even without my help. You're the most amazing person I've ever met."

He caressed her cheek lovingly, his eyes solemn and deep.

"I love you, Louise. Since the first time I met you, I think."

Lou's eyes filled with tears. Kid said that as if it was the most natural thing in the world, and yet they were the most precious words she had ever heard.

"I love you too, Kid." She responded with a tiny, husky voice.

She leaned on him and kissed him fully on the lips. It was tender at first but then grew deep. Kid followed her lead until her hands began to wander on his body and their breath became shallow. She stopped only when she heard him moan in pain, rapidly pushing herself away from him.

"Kid…" she exhaled, out of breath. "Do I hurt you?"

Her desire was evident in her voice and eyes as well as in Kid's body; but it was clear that it wasn't the right moment for him to discover the new sensation they both were feelings so deep.

"It's ok, Lou" he said through gritted teeth "It's just…let's take things slow, ok?"

As much as he hated to interrupt that magical moment, he was also very much in pain due to the stiffness that an entire day on the saddle had left on him. The girl chuckled, embarrassed of her own boldness.

"Ok…" she said, and she repositioned herself beside him, with her head on his shoulder and the arm draped loosely around his chest.

"Say it again," Lou's husky voice said.

"He took her hand, slightly kissing her fingers."

"I love you Louise, 'till the end of my days."

* * *

"Rider's comin'!"

Lou's head shot up to look in the direction of the approaching rider, tensing until she spotted the familiar patches of Katy's coat and the rider she was carrying. It was a month since she and Kid had returned from Prosperity and that was the first run he took after having healed from his injury. Even if Teaspoon gave the young Southerner an easy one, along a very well known path, Lou couldn't help to be worried the entire time he was away. She knew it was an irrational feeling and that she had to fight it, since Kid would take a lot of other runs after that first one, but she couldn't help herself. She finally started to understand why Kid was always annoyingly worried about her safety.

When Katy entered in the yard she jump down the fence she was sitting on and ran to him, barely giving the young man the time to dismount from his mare before hugging him hard.

"Welcome back Kid," she said, burying her face in his dirty jacket.

Her heart was swelling for joy to see him back. It was stupid, she recognized that, their work was made of departures and returns, and after months they had became accustomed not to see each other for a while. But this time was different, since they finally said to each other 'I love you' something changed between them. Not their feelings, that ran as deep as always, but the way they lived them. It was as if having spoken aloud what they felt deepened and fortified their already existing bond. Lou felt like shouting her love for Kid to everyone, as well as she felt the need of having him close stronger and stronger every day.

"I missed you." Kid murmured in her hair, while wrapped his arms around her.

The girl looked up to stare in his blue eyes smiling.

"I missed you, too." She responded, dropping a kiss on his lips.

"What's happened to those two?!" Cody asked half surprised, half annoyed by all the sudden sloppiness that Kid and Lou were showing.

The blonde rider knew those two were in love: heck! even a blind man could see that! But they had always been more discreet about showing their feelings. Even after Teaspoon had discovered the girl's true nature they limited themselves to a hug or at handclasp; they never kissed in the middle of the yard, where everyone could see them.

But since they were returned together from that horrible town where Kid almost died, they have became…bolder, Cody couldn't put a finger where, but something had surely changed between those two.

"Do you think they have done the deed?" he asked quite bluntly.

Ike swatted him on the back.

You're disgusting. he signed.

"C'mon guys," he continued, unaffected by his friend's scolding. "I bet you're as curious as me. I mean, how many years they said they have known each other? And it's obvious they are smitten…so I say it'd be just right if they had finally done it!"

Jimmy smirked, Cody's reasoning wasn't wrong. The problems they had – and which he had been partially responsible for- before the 'Prosperity Accident' had been obviously solved, and now Kid and Lou seemed closer than ever. If they had 'done the deed' as their inopportune blonde friend was saying, then Jimmy was happy for them.

* * *

"How was your ride, Kid?"

Lou had accompanied the Southerner rider inside the stables, he seemed to be ok but she wanted to be sure.

"Fine." Kid smiled. "The biggest danger I had to face has been to die out of boredom." He laughed, but the girl continued.

"And the wound? Did you feel pain?"

"No, Lou, I swear." The young man responded patiently, "I have been perfectly good."

Lou stared at him for a moment before adding.

"Can I give a look?"

"What? Now? Well…I don't know if it's a good idea, it's better I take a shower first…you know, I'm not smelling of roses and violets right now."

"I do know how you smell, Kid." The petite brunette said in a tone that made Kid blush. "C'mon, let me see."

She grabbed the young man's shirt and began to unbutton it and Kid put his hands on the hips, defeated.

"Oh well, excuse us." Cody's voice interrupted the couple's action.

"This ain't what it looks like." Kid tried to justify himself and Lou.

"Don't look like nothin' to me. It look like somethin' to you, Jimmy?" the blonde rider said to his companion.

Jimmy couldn't help to smirk seeing their two embarrassed faces. Those two were a lost cause; if the "deed" wasn't already happened, then it was just a matter of time. But it was Kid the one they were talking about, and in the months spent together Jimmy had come to know how reserved his friend was, and how seriously he took things with Lou. He wasn't sure he understood the Virginian's attitude, maybe it was part of his Southern upbringing, but it was most likely connected with how much Kid cared for his girl.

Their bond was something Jimmy had never felt with any of the girls he had been with. He had fallen in love several times, putting all his heart on the line in any of the stories he lived, but what Lou and Kid had was different; it wasn't only fire and passion, but something deeper and stronger, something destined to last.

"I-I think I'll go take that shower, now…" Kid said, taking the chance to free himself from Lou's grasp and hastily going to the door.

"See you later, Lou." He saluted her, smiling softly before to exit from the barn.

Lou's look was disappointed as the one of a child whose favorite toy had been taken away and Jimmy and Cody couldn't help but laugh.

"Don't worry, Lou. You can have him later." Cody chuckled.

"I was only checking his wound." The girl responded glaring at him, and then she walked away with as much dignity as she could manage.

The two friends waited until she was outside and then they cracked up with laughter.

* * *

"Jimmy…Jimmy…"

"You got something to ask, Kid, or do you just like the sound of my name?"

Jimmy raised an eyebrow to look at Kid, tired after his run and slightly annoyed that his rest had been disturbed.

"I was wondering if I could ask you a question," the blue-eyed blue eyed man said, a bit worried.

"It's about Lou," he added after a bit.

Jimmy raised from his bunk, now more interested about what his friend had to say.

"Can you…I need some advice about well, you know that…"

Jimmy smiled seeing Kid's distressed face. That boy was as brave and strong-headed as any of them, able to get through the toughest situation without losing his calm; but when it came to women, to a petite brown-haired girl, in particular, he seemed to be at a loss.

"I wouldn't worry too much about 'that', Kid." he smiled reassuringly "In my experience things just kinda got a way of workin' themselves out."

"Well, I ain't you Jimmy… It was easier before,.. you know. First time I met Lou we're just more than kids, we had to face some hard times together but, in a way, things between us are simpler. But now..."

"Now?" Jimmy led him to continue.

"Now, we aren't kids anymore. And what we have it isn't enough."

"Then, there's only one thing you can do before you both go crazy," he said. _'And make us crazy as well,'_ he added silently.

At Kid questioning glance, the young gunslinger added:

"Dance."

"It's just that…I don't want to hurt her…I want it to be special…"

"You love her, Kid?"

"Yes," he responded, blushing even further; he appreciated a lot Jimmy's willingness to help and listen to him, but talks like that weren't very easy for him.

Jimmy smiled at him.

"That will make it special, then. There's no need of anything else."

He squeezed affectionately his blue-eyed friend shoulder. "That and a romantic evening to spend alone, away from this bunch of busybodies who are your friends." He winked, including himself in the bunch. "Teaspoon had a double run scheduled to St Joe in about a week, if you are interested."

Kid nodded slowly. "Then…then I think I'll go talk to him…" he said.

Rising from the table, Kid stopped to look at the young gunslinger for a moment. They fought like cats and dogs sometimes, he knew he could count on Jimmy whenever he needed help; and that he would always have Jimmy's back as well.

"Thank you, Jimmy." He said looking straight in his dark eyes. "You're a good friend."

Jimmy shrugged his shoulders and waved him away.

"Go away now, lovebird; and let me rest." He said smiling.

* * *

'_Dance'_ Jimmy had said, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. In a way it was true, he loved Louise and she loved him back. Plus the longing in her eyes was unmistakeable, she wanted to be with him.

But then Kid couldn't help but think about what that monster Wicks had done to her. A lot of time had passed since that horrible night, but he still feared that Lou wasn't ready to take the next step in their relationship, and that her behavior was caused only by the scare his misadventure gave her or, worse, that she wanted somehow to please him because she knew that it was what he wanted.

Kid sighed heavily; his bad habit of dwelling on things had always caused problems for him. "You should do a little less thinkin' and a lot more doin'," Lou said him once, and she was right. He couldn't continue to put off what was inevitable. He would go to talk with Teaspoon about that double-ride.


	11. Chapter 11

**THE ONLY THING **

**by Daydreamer P.**

Chapter 11

Lou sat on the double bed, her heart beating fast, her stomach tied in a knot, anxious and excited at the same time. She was in a small but comfy double room of a little hotel called Redfern, halfway between Sweetwater and St Joseph, waiting for Kid.

When her blue eyed, gentle-faced rider asked her if she wanted to take that double run with him it was obvious, from the way he held her hands and the low tone of his voice, that he was asking a lot more, but Lou had accepted readily. She had been shocked when Kid first revealed to her he wanted to make love with her, then she had been ashamed by the feelings his revelation had stirred, but now Louise felt she was finally ready to give herself to the man she loved, and nothing else had ever felt so right.

Lou slowly began to unbutton her shirt; Kid had gone to check the horses and she had ordered a bath. Piling her riding clothes on a nearby chair, she stood naked by the bathtub. Looking down at her plain figure, she wondered for the millionth time how someone as gorgeous as Kid could want her. She was so ordinary-looking and troubled, and he could have girls so much prettier and more refined. But Kid wanted her, he desired and loved her, and this made Lou feel like the most special girl in the world.

She placed a hand on her lower belly, as if to calm down the sweet warmness that had begun to pulse in there. That evening would change what they were forever. It hadn't been a rash decision, as Kid feared, but something that had built inside of her little by little, until she had come to the point she couldn't bear anymore to be away from him. Kid hadn't pushed her into anything, even during their trip alone they had slept in separate rooms and they never went farther than kisses and embraces during the nights spent on the trail, but that evening all this waiting would end.

Louise smiled while entering the water, that evening they would finally become one.

* * *

Kid stood nervously before their hotel room, his and Lou's. He hesitated a moment before knocking on the door lightly with his knuckles, his other hand squeezing a little too hard around the daisies he brought for her. When Louise suggested taking only one room for the night, it had been as if something exploded in Kid's chest. He knew that moment would arrive sooner or later but now, waiting for her response, he was nervous as a child the first day of school.

"Come in…" he heard Lou's soft voice and he when stepped into the room, what he saw made him speechless.

Lou was wearing a simple white sleeveless nightgown and she had filled the room with candles, their flames casting a golden glow on her face and arms.

"How…what…" were the only words Kid was able to babble, completely mesmerized by the beauty before his eyes.

Lou saw the adoration in Kid's face and blushed; he was as nervous as her, she realized watching him standing there, with a bunch of flowers in his hand, unable to move or to speak. She smiled, somewhat reassured.

"For me?" she asked indicating the daisies.

Kid seemed to re-wake in that moment and, blushing, he handed the flower to her.

'_Get a grip on__ yourself!'_ the young man chided himself mentally. It's not that it was his first time with a woman, even if he hadn't been with anyone since his first experiences with the girls at Wicks' brothel. He would have liked Lou to be his first, but in a way it was better like this, so he wouldn't risk hurting her or embarrassing her with his inexperience. He wanted everything was perfect for her.

He was able to calm himself now. That night was Lou's and he would show her how much he loved her, nothing else mattered. Kid took a step toward her, who was looking for somewhere to put the flowers, and he gently took the bunch and put it in the pitcher near the washbasin.

"Here," he said smiling, and then he caressed her bare arms lovingly.

He took her delicate face and kissed her, slowly savouring her; then he surrounded Lou's small frame with his arms until he could feel her slight curves under the thin layer of her nightgown. Kid's body began to react to her nearness and Lou instinctively gasped.

Kid pulled away to search in her eyes. "Lou?"

"I'm ok," she reassured him.

"Are you sure?"

She nodded, her big brown eyes burning in his.

"Make me yours, Kid," she said with a low husky voice.

That was all Kid needed. He picked her in his arms and brought her to the bed.

* * *

Louise caressed Kid's torso languidly, her head leaned on his chest while his strong arm surrounded her protectively. She almost couldn't believe what happened between Kid and her was real. He had guided her gently and passionately until she had lost herself in him; and then he held her close, soothing her when she cried afterward. Now they really were one, she thought, amazed and scared of how right it felt.

Her fingers grazed the suture the doctor made just under Kid's ribs. She wanted to know all his scars and wounds, every inch of his body; she wanted to know everything about him. He was hers now, Lou thought possessively, as she was his.

"Louise…" Kid's low voice was a rumble in her ear pressed against his ribcage.

"Yes…" she almost purred.

"Marry me, Louise," he said.

The girl's eyes shot open, she raised herself on the elbows to look at him, his expression was loving but determined.

"Marry me, Louise," he repeated. "I want to spend my life with you, I never wanted anyone else."

A sob escaped from the girl's lips. She couldn't believe what he had just said. Kid wanted to marry her, it seemed too good to be true; but how could she marry him? With her brother and sister still at the orphanage she couldn't abandon her work as Pony Express rider.

"Oh Kid…" she said with a trembling voice. "I can't…"

Kid's heart was crushed at her words, but he sat up against the headboard, bringing her up with him and embracing her.

"I can't lose my job." Lou continued, "I have to take care of Jeremiah and Teresa, I can't abandon them."

He kissed her temple, pulling her closer.

"I don't want you to renounce to your life, Louise. I just want to be with you forever." He smiled, self-conscious. " And if we marry I can help you with your siblings, we can continue to work as riders and that way we can earn the money we need to get them out of the orphanage faster. Sure, we have to keep it from our friends, but…I love you Louise and I'd like to make our bond as official as it could be. I know it's stupid," he added hastily. "But…"

Lou put a finger on Kid's lips to stop the young man's rambling.

"Do you really want all of this, Kid? Marry me secretly, help me with Tessie and Miah, us continuing to work as riders?"

The girl knew that Kid was quite conventional about that kind of stuff, wanting a nice family and a ranch; the sincerity in his blue eyes told her he really meant what he said, but Lou wanted to be sure.

Kid looked at her straight in the eyes and nodded.

"I know you'd never expect me to say it; but I do want to be with you Louise, and I do care about you brother and sister, the rest doesn't matter."

At his sincere words Louise choked back a sob.

"And then I'd be happy to be your wife," she said through tears.

* * *

Kid and Louise stepped into the front yard of the small convent of the Sisters of Charity, hand in hand. The girl was wearing a simple but pretty cotton dress that Kid had wanted to buy for her. The delicate shade of pink might not have been very suitable for the dirt and the dust of the prairie, but the expression Kid's face when he looked at her made her feel like a princess.

After Kid's proposal, they had spent the night talking and celebrating the engagement. They had decided to marry in St Joe, even if it was still several days away, so Lou's brother and sister could attend the ceremony.

They intended to ask the nuns if they could marry there at the orphanage and then hold a little feast for the children. They couldn't share their joy with their Express family but at least they could make the little orphans happy, even if only for a day.

"Ready, Lou?" Kid asked squeezing gently her hand.

"Ready."

Mother Auberthe was pleased to know that that little rebel Louise McCloud had found a nice young man and she wanted to start a family with him. The woman had been really worried when, years before, Louise ran off without a word, fearing she would get lost outside the safe walls of the orphanage. Instead the girl had found her way in life, even if it was quite unconventional and, what's more important, someone who loved and cared about her.

The Mother remembered that young man called Kid quite well, as he was the boy who never lost contact with Jeremiah and Teresa through all those years, and she was sure he would make Louise happy. She agreed immediately when they asked if they could marry there at the orphanage and was touched to know they wanted to offer a feast for the children after the ceremony.

"It's a very nice thought," she said, taking Lou's hands in hers. "God knows how our children need some fun every once in a while. Thank you, both of you," she concluded, glancing at Kid.

Kid and Lou nodded, a little embarrassed by the big fuss the nun made about their offer. They didn't have too much money with them but they were sure they could do something nice.

Unfortunately, asking the nuns' permission and organizing a little feast wasn't enough to arrange the wedding. Lou was raised as a Catholic but Kid wasn't and the Church usually didn't permit mixed marriages without being granted a special dispensation. Even if Kid had been Catholic, the Church did not allow a marriage to take place so suddenly; banns were required to be published in the local church for three weeks in advance.

Mother Auberthe understood the young couple's situation, since Lou was in disguise and they wanted to be married as soon as possible. For this reason she suggested Kid and Louise to talk with the local priest. Father Francis Howard was a old friend of hers, assured Mother Auberthe, and the woman was sure he would help the young couple once he was sure of their intentions.

"I can make an appointment with Father Francis for this afternoon," the nun said once she finished talking, "but you must be really convinced of the step you want to take."

Kid looked at the Mother with his clear and honest eyes and nodded.

"Yes I'm sure, Mother," he said.

Lou squeezed Kid's hand, her heart filling with love for him, who was willing to go through these new problems for her sake.

"Can we see Jeremiah and Teresa, now?" Louise asked, once it was all set for their afternoon encounter.

She was eager to talk with her siblings but also a little anxious about their reaction. What would they think when she told them she was going to marry Kid but they still couldn't bring them away? Lou had been able to save a little money, but it wasn't enough to settle down, not even with Kid's help. She hoped they would understand that.

"Lou…are you ok?" Kid's soft question distracted her from her thoughts.

Mother Auberthe was walking them to the back yard where Jeremiah and Teresa were spending the recess with all the other children. Louise was not even aware she had squeezed Kid's hand hard, obviously nervous about their imminent encounter.

She looked up at her fiancé and forced a smile.

"It's just that I'm little nervous…I wonder how Miah and Tessie will take the news."

"I'm sure they'll be happy," Kid said "Little Tessie asked me when I'd marry you practically from the first time I met her."

"What?!" the girl never expected her little sister to be so blunt.

"C'mon Lou. You know how little girls are, always looking for romance. I think I'm like Prince Charming for Teresa."

"Should I be jealous?" Lou teased, her anxiety forgotten for the moment.

Kid laughed heartily but he didn't get the chance to respond, since a cry of joy interrupted their talk.

As soon as she spotted Louise and Kid, Teresa stopped what she was doing and ran toward the couple.

"Luly!" she cried.

Her calling made also Jeremiah aware of the presence of his older sister and the boy followed Teresa at a slower pace, after all he wasn't a baby anymore.

* * *

Kid and Lou brought the children to a walk, Tessie and Miah enjoyed being outside in the prairie, after being always cooped within the small walls of the orphanage, so Lou let them play and run freely for a while. When finally they got tired and sat down near their sister, Lou plucked up her courage and announced Kid and her marriage.

Teresa squealed in delight, hugging her sister tightly and beginning to ask a thousand questions at one time. Jeremiah instead didn't say anything, so Lou looked at him apprehensively. The boy looked at her with an indecipherable expression, and then he asked Lou's most dreaded question.

"Are you going to bring us away after the wedding?"

At his brother words also Teresa stopped her talking and looked at Louise expectantly.

The young woman didn't know what to say, her siblings were looking at her with such hope in their faces that Lou couldn't work up the nerve to disappoint them. She chewed her lips, trying to find the right words to say, but Kid preceded her.

"Miah, Tessie, we would be happy to bring you with us but we can't right now. Can you understand that?"

The young man had surrounded Lou's shoulder protectively.

"I imagined that." Jeremiah said without caring to hide the disappointment in his tone. "But I also know that you didn't let us down for all these years and if you're going to marry our sister then we will be sure she won't disappear again."

Miah raised his eyes to look again toward Kid, this time with a smile on his lips. He reached out his hand to shake Kid's, but Louise froze at her brother's words.

It had been as he had slapped her, Jeremiah hadn't forgiven her and Lou feared he would never do it. The girl felt Kid's arm hug her tighter, but this didn't give her so much comfort in that moment. She stared at Jeremiah, unable to utter a single word.

The boy understood in that moment he had put a foot in his mouth, hurting his sister. He really didn't hold a grudge anymore toward her, not after their reencounter. Louise never told what had kept her away for so long but she was making up for the time lost and, as much as he liked to play the role of the grown-up in front of her, he was overjoyed to have found his older sister again.

"I didn't mean anything," he tried to apologize.

"No Miah…you're right, I've disappeared for almost 5 years…"

"I don't care, Luly, really" he continued, using the pet name Tessie chose for her. He took her hand.

"The important thing is that you came back at last."

Tears sprang from Lou's eyes.

"Oh Miah," she cried, feeling very stupid showing herself so emotional in front of her little brother and sister.

She embraced him tightly.

"One day I'll tell you both why I couldn't come visit you for so long. I promise."

* * *

In the afternoon Kid and Lou were received by Mother Auberthe's friend. Father Francis was an open-minded and immensely practical man, having lived in the West for many years. He knew after all this time that the worth of a man wasn't to be measured by his professions of faith, but in the goodness of his heart. Therefore, as soon as he understood the man called Kid had a good heart and took his commitment to his fiancée seriously, he agreed to give the necessary dispensations for their wedding.

The ceremony was arranged for a couple of days after Kid and Lou's arrival in St Joe and, as the couple requested, it took place at the orphanage, with the help of the children and the nuns they brought the benches and the chairs into the backyard to form enough rows for everyone. The girls had picked flowers to decorate the aisle and made a bouquet and a garland for Louise. As Kid said, they were all excited about the ceremony and looked at the couple with a dreamy look on their face, as if the marriage was the most romantic thing in the world.

The altar was placed under the big tree in the centre of the yard and in a corner there were a couple of big tables full of cakes, drinks and many other good things. Actually Kid and Lou didn't have too much money too spare for such things, but seeing the happiness and the excitement on the children's faces was the best repayment they could have.

Kid's clothes were just a little better than the ones he used on the trail and also Louise was wearing the simple dress of the previous days but with her hair entwined with flowers and the loving glance she threw at her husband to be while she walked down the aisle on Jeremiah's arm she never looked more beautiful in Kid's eyes.

Louise was barely able to follow what Father Francis was saying, her mind could only focus on Kid and how, soon, they would be committed for life; but it wasn't a scaring thought. She had already experienced how it was not having him by her side and Lou never wanted it to happen ever again. Their marriage was happening sooner than she expected, but the young bride knew their union was meant to be.

When the moment of the exchange of the rings arrived, Teresa came from the end of the aisle proudly bringing two weeding bands. Lou sucked her breath, glancing at Kid she saw his bashful smile she understood it had been his last surprise to her. The rest of the ceremony passed in a blur behind the curtain of the tears Lou forced herself not to shed, since she wanted to remember everything of that day. But they finally fell free when Father Francis declared them man and wife and Kid kissed her for the first time as her husband.

The feast after the wedding was full of joy and laughs and children's play and Kid and Lou felt they had done right in deciding to marry at the orphanage. They received drawings and other little hand-made mementos and Mother Auberthe shyly slipped in the young wife hands a small silver angel. "To protect and guard your family."

It was a simple, loud and messy feast, but Kid and Lou couldn't be happier or feel luckier than in that moment. At the end of the afternoon Kid and Lou waved goodbye to the children and the nuns, promising Jeremiah and Teresa they would return the next day to say goodbye to them before heading back to Sweetwater; then they rode back to St Joe, eager to check in to a hotel and spend their first night as husband and wife.

They left the buggy at the livery where they had rented it and, after a brief check on Katy and Lighting, they went to a nearby hotel. The couple walked down the street with a big grin on their faces, so absolutely overjoyed they felt almost giddy, unable to do anything else than smile to each other.

"After you, Mrs. McCloud," Kid said, keeping open the hotel door for Lou.

"McCloud?" Louise asked frowning, "I thought I was Mrs. Pook, now."

Kid shook sadly his head. "I prefer to leave my father's name behind, if it's ok for you."

"Sure" the brown haired girl responded softly, kissing him on the lips.

"Then let's go, Mrs. McCloud," she added linking her arm with his and leading them toward the desk.

In that moment the young couple was so full of love that they didn't notice some familiar eyes staring at them form the other side of the street, eyes that belonged to someone who lived on the other end of the town, where all the brothels and saloons were.

"Look there, the little mouse is finally grown up and there is the Southern boy with her! I guess we didn't beat him hard enough last time…" a rugged looking man smirked. "Good, the boss will be happy to know his fugitives have finally gotten back here."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

"Well…boys and girl. For one evening that nobody is away, I think it's time to talk about quite an important issue."

Teaspoon announced it from the end of the table and Lou and the others stopped their dinner and looked at their Station-manager, curious to know what Teaspoon was talking about. Knowing him, it could be everything from a new game or invention he wanted to try, to a mission for the army.

"Someone, around here, is hiding something," Teaspoon said with a smirk.

Kid and Lou froze, grabbing each others' hands from under the table. Several weeks had passed since their return from St. Joe, and the newlyweds had spent their trip back to Sweetwater as if it was their honeymoon, staying in hotels whenever they could and enjoying their days and nights as husband and wife.

Once back to the Station it became hard not to tell anything to their friends as well as not to sleep together at night, but they managed to find the time for themselves without giving away their secret, at least until that moment. They glanced at each other briefly before turning their attention back to Teaspoon.

"Someone around here," the man continued, "is hiding from us something about…a wedding!"

The young couple sucked their breaths, terrified, but Emma swatting Teaspoon's shoulder covered their reaction.

"Mr Spoon!" she chided him, blushing in a shade of crimson red.

"There was a chorus of "Emma?!" as everyone turned to look at the station mother. She was trying to look irritated by the old man's revelation, but couldn't wipe a sweet, almost silly grin off her face. It was a look that none of them had ever seen her wear before.

"Are you really going to marry Sam?"

"When?"

"Are you going to leave us?"

"How will we make without you?"

They submerged the woman with their questions and Emma tried her best to respond to each one of them.

"Yes, I'm truly going to marry Sam, we arranged the wedding for the end of the month and yes, unfortunately I'm going to leave you but…" she hurried to add when the riders began to protest loudly, "…but I won't be very far. Sam and I will stay in town, and I'm not going to leave you without help; a friend of mine is going to come here and take my place. Her name is Rachel, she is a widow and she has a daughter and they both will come to stay here at the Station."

Muttered protests could be heard around the table, but Teaspoon shushed them. Lou, who was relieved that her and Kid's secret hadn't been found out, was the first to recover from the shock of Emma's sudden marriage and she got up from the table to congratulate the woman. Then, one by one all the boys went to hug and kiss the future bride.

In another situation probably Louise would have been jealous of Emma and maybe would have seen her marriage as a sort of betrayal and abandonment, but since she herself was a married woman, the girl could understand the station-mistress' feelings perfectly, and she was happy for her.

"Emma, when did you say your friend is going to arrive?" Cody huffed.

He and the other riders were standing near the stagecoach's post, waiting for Widow Dunne. They had convinced the station-mother not to make them wear their Sunday clothes, but the red-haired woman had ordered them to take a bath and make themselves presentable 'because I don't want Rachel to think you all are savages', were the exact words she used.

Actually none of the riders had ever been unkempt or looked like a 'savage', on the contrary, they were cleaner and more careful about their looks than a lot of other ranchers around there; but Emma wanted her boys and girl to make the best impression on Rachel. Her friend came from New Orleans and, although she had been living out in the West for several years now and she had even married a simple farmer, Emma knew Rachel's taste was a bit more refined than hers. Her husband Henry had died some months before leaving her alone with little Agnes to raise, and Emma was glad to help her.

Finally the stagecoach arrived and the passengers began to climb down; when Emma went to greet her friend the boys' mouth fell open in shock and admiration. Even Kid couldn't help noticing the beauty of their new station-mother and this earned him a painful pinch and a scowl from Lou.

Rachel Dunne was a beautiful woman with strawberry blonde curls and green eyes and she had a body that, as the boys would say, 'filled out the dress she was wearing quite well'. All the boys, minus Kid who didn't want to risk another pinch from Lou, hurried to help the woman with her luggage.

Lou couldn't help to feel a fit of jealousy at that sight. The new station-mother was so beautiful and charming that she had her friends drooling at her mere seconds after her arrival in Sweetwater. She never had been one of the girls who made men's heads turn, even when she was all dressed up. Actually, she didn't care very much; Kid's admiration was all she wanted. For that matter, after what had happened in her past, having a man ogling her would have made her uncomfortable and scared. Just the same, though, she felt irritated to see how the riders were making fools of themselves in front of a woman they'd never seen before, only because she had a pretty face … the curves she didn't have.

It was irrational, Lou recognized it, but she was already starting to dislike Rachel for her charm, when the woman turned to the inside the stagecoach and took in her arms a little blonde toddler of about one year. She tenderly adjusted the dress the child was wearing and then kissed lightly the soft blonde curls on her little head, before introducing her Agnes to Emma and the others.

Louise's heart tugged at that sight, she herself had taken care of Teresa when she was a baby and she had seen thousand of times mothers do the same with their children; but that time she was touched. Maybe because for the first time she imagined herself holding a blue-eyed baby much in the same fashion Rachel was doing with her daughter.

She turned toward Kid and was surprised to see a tender look on his face too.

"C'mon Kid, let's go to greet the new station-mother." She talked in that gruff tone she used when she was in public, but at the same time she flashed a tiny smile to her husband. "She doesn't seem too bad."

After Rachel's arrival Emma continued to live at the Station while she was preparing for her wedding, and getting the house she was going to share with Sam ready; at first she helped Rachel to adjust to her new role, a bit worried about how her friend will able to handle a bunch of too-lively boys, a house, a bunkhouse and a little girl, but soon Emma's fears were dispelled.

Rachel put the boys in their place after they ogled a bit too much at her and, despite her luscious and charming appearance she showed to everyone she was able to run the house with a strong hand when necessary, but also with great kindness. While Emma was as a second mother for the riders, Rachel became more a friend and a confidant for them, and the riders and Teaspoon grew to appreciate her as much as the future Mrs Cain.

"You're very good with children, Louise." Rachel told, smiling at the girl.

The petite rider and the new station mother were sitting under the porch, enjoying the quiet warm evening. The boys had gone with Emma and Teaspoon to a Social in town but the two women had preferred to stay at the Station, one because she still didn't feel like dancing after her recent loss, and the other because she was waiting for a certain rider to return from his run.

Lou had taken little Agnes in her arms and rocked her until she fell asleep with her little head against her shoulder.

"Oh well, thank you," Lou responded a bit embarrassed.

She had never thought about having a baby but now that she was Kid's wife she couldn't help but imagine the children that one day they will have.

"It's just that I have a younger brother and sister and I helped my mother with them before she…when she got ill."

"I see…" the older woman said, a bit embarrassed to have touched such a delicate issue.

"Where are your siblings now?" she asked after a while to break the silence.

"Tessie and Miah are in an orphanage in St. Joe but Kid and I are working to…"

"You and Kid?"

Lou blushed; she had got used to thinking about Kid and herself as a "we" so the expression had slipped out of her mouth without thinking.

"Oh well…" the girl blabbed, trying to cover her mistake."Well, we would like to bring them away from the orphanage and start a ranch one day." she concluded blushing, that was more than she had ever revealed to anyone about Kid and her.

"So Kid is your fiancé…" Rachel inquired.

"Sort of…" Lou blushed even harder; she surely couldn't say 'he is my husband'.

Rachel smiled warmly at Lou's antics, it was good to see a young couple so in love. It made her heart ache a little, making her remember about her own husband. She wasn't young as Lou when she fell for Henry, she had had her good share of experiences with the other sex before him, but only Henry Dunne had been able to make her heart flutter as if she still was 15 years old.

"Give me Agnes, I'll put her in bed. You can wait for Kid here. Just remember to blow out the lamp when you turn in for the night." The woman wasn't exactly tired but she wanted to give the girl a little privacy.

"Good night Louise," she said before entered inside the house with her daughter.

"Good night to you." Lou smiled back and then she settled comfortably on the swing porch, waiting for Kid to arrive.

That was the first evening they could spend together alone since they had come back to Sweetwater; everyone already knew about their relationship, so Kid and Lou could indulge in some cuddling, but it wasn't enough anymore now that they were a married couple. Lou had lost count of times she and Kid had slipped out of the bunkhouse when their friends were sleeping, or they had gone to their swimming hole; but what the girl really missed was not being able to wake up in Kid's arms every morning, or not being able to talk openly about the fact they were husband and wife, especially now that the Station was full of talking about Emma and Sam's impending wedding.

Lou sighed, it was hard for both of them, but that sacrifice was necessary if they wanted to give Teresa and Jeremiah a home and, by all means, living with their friends and continuing to work as a rider wasn't bad at all. Teaspoon, the boys, Emma and now Rachel and her daughter had become a family to her and it would have been hard to leave them when the time to settle would arrive.

In the dim light of the dusk Kid made out the tall windmill of the Station and a big smile broke on his face. He spurred Katy to go faster because he knew who was waiting for him at home and he couldn't wait to spend the evening alone with his wife.

What he didn't notice were some figures observing him from afar. They had been following him for two days now, laying back and waiting for Kid to finally meet with Louise McCloud.

"Seems that our boy is in a hurry this evening, doesn't he?" Hank said putting down the spyglass he had used to look at Kid.

"Yeah…his little hussy must be near…" his friend Slater smirked, but his grin was stopped by a tall, well-dressed man, who grabbed his arm painfully.

"Louise is not his." Wicks said icily. "She is mine, and I'll make sure she won't forget it ever again."

Lou greeted Kid with a sweet smile, grabbing Katy's reins and leading the mare toward the stable for him. She didn't jump to kiss or hug him but the smile Kid flashed in her direction was enough to make the girl's knees tremble.

Kid was quite dusty from the ride but the dirt on his face served only to enlighten the blue of his eyes. Lou had prepared a bath and the thought of helping her husband wash away all that dirt made her smile grew in anticipation.

"Don't worry about Katy, Kid, I'll take care of her. There's a bath waiting for you in the bunkhouse."

"A bath?" the young man asked, pleasantly surprised.

"Mmmh mmmh. I'll hurry here with your girl and then I'll join you."

"To help me to wash my back?" Kid said teasingly.

"Also your back, Kid also your back…"

Their flirting was abruptly interrupted by a high-pitched wail, followed by a desperate scream, both of them coming from the house.

"Agnes…" Lou said, her eyes widening in fear.

"And Rachel…" Kid continued. "Let's go, Lou."

The couple ran out the barn but what they saw made them stop where they were in the middle of the yard. A man was cruelly holding Agnes by the waist, making her chubby legs dangle in mid air. The baby was crying desperately in pain and fear from being held by unknown, rude hands. Rachel had been grabbed by another man, who was holding a gun at her head. She stood immobile, but her eyes, full of terror, were fixed on her daughter.

"Oh God…" Louise breathed, but she didn't dare to move.

"Let them go! We don't have anything of value!" Kid said, his hand moving slowly toward his gun, still strapped to his thigh.

The poor Agnes continued to wail, filling the night with her pitiful sobs, but a calm voice was heard even over the screaming.

"I don't think so, Kid," it said, "I don't think so at all."

A shiver ran down Louise's back when she heard that frightening quiet voice. A tall man emerged from the shadow of the porch and Kid and Lou froze.

"Wicks…" Kid said.

"Yes, Wicks." The man smirked, "and you both know that here something of mine is here." He turned to look at Lou.

"You," he concluded, looking at her in the eyes.

"She is not yours!" Kid retorted angrily.

Wicks merely glanced at the rider for a moment, as if what he had just said wasn't even worth being considered, and then he turned to Hank and took the little Agnes. He curled his finger around the baby's delicate throat, making the child scream even more. "Now…if you don't want this cute little girl to die before her mother's eyes, you'll come here, Louise."

Rachel made a strangled sound, trying to free herself from the man who was holding her, but Slater tightened his grin on her and pushed the gun harder against the woman's temple.

"Stay put, if you want to stay alive"

"Leave them alone!" Lou said, speaking for the first time since she had seen Wicks. "They have nothing to do with you!"

"Come with me and I let them go." He menacingly caressed the small neck of Agnes. "She is so little, anything could happen to such a delicate little thing …"

Rachel whimpered.

"Stop!" Lou said, "You won, I'll come with you; please let them go now…" she concluded, defeated.

"Lou no!" Kid exclaimed.

But the girl turned to look at him. "There isn't any other way, Kid." Trembling, she smiled at him and then she stepped toward the porch. "I love you," she mouthed before turning towards Wicks.

As soon as she was within reaching distance, Hank grabbed Lou, forcing her arms behind her back and tying her.

"I knew you'd do the right thing, Louise." Wicks smirked.

He put Agnes back in her mother's arms, who quickly hugged the scared girl to her heart. Wicks then went to Lou, grabbing the girl by the hair at the base of her neck and forcing her to look up at him.

"You made me spend a lot of time and money, Louise McCloud." Wicks said viciously at her ear. "You'll repay me with interest, be sure of that."

Lou spat at him but the man didn't lose his composure. He cleaned himself with a handkerchief and then he slapped the girl so hard she would have fallen down if Hank weren't holding her.

Kid had to rely on all his self-control not to take his gun and shoot at Wicks. He would have killed that man as soon as he had laid eyes on him, but both Rachel and Lou were held at a gunpoint and one single bad move on his part could cause a bloodbath.

"We've lost enough time," Wicks said, "Slater, take care of the lady; and Kid…" he turned to look at the rider. "This is for stealing for what's mine."

He pulled out his gun and shot him. Lou saw her love fall on the ground and screamed.

"Kid!!" she yelled desperately, "Kid!!" but he didn't respond to her.

She wrestled with the two men who were holding her, but Wicks hit her with the back of his gun, making the girl lose her senses and fall limply in his arms.

"Slater! We don't have time to waste! Shoot the woman and come here!"

Rachel was roughly pushed down the porch steps and she fell heavily on the ground, trying to protect Agnes from the fall. Slater aimed at the woman, smirking.

"It's a pity the boss doesn't want any witnesses, or the two of us could have gotten better acquainted, couldn't we?"

The man's evil grin widened and Rachel braced herself for the bullet, holding her daughter tightly and hoping that they would spare her at least. But the shot never came; galloping horses could be heard approaching rapidly and soon Cody and Jimmy appeared in the yard, firing at the intruders. Rachel crouched on the ground trying to protect herself.

The gun-battle lasted a few minutes and when Rachel finally could get up again, the men and Lou had disappeared and she hurried to Kid, who lay unmoving, while a pool of blood was rapidly forming under him.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

The riders quickly dismounted from their horses and approached Kid and Rachel. The boys and Teaspoon were returning from the social when they heard a gunshot coming from the station. Fearing something had happened to the women they had left there, Jimmy and Cody spurred their horses, followed close behind by the others.

Once they reached the yard Cody drew the rifle he always carried with him and aimed at the man who held Rachel at gunpoint; the other two men where too near to Lou, who appeared to be unconscious, so the young rifleman didn't dare to shoot in their direction.

He hit Slater but Wicks and Hank were able to escape, even though Jimmy, Buck and Ike had joined the gun-battle. Shielding themselves with Lou's body Wicks and Hank mounted their horses and disappeared in the night. Once they disappeared, Jimmy with Buck rushed to Kid while Cody went to help up a trembling Rachel.

"Is he...is he…?" the blonde woman asked looking toward the fallen rider, unable to say the much dreaded words aloud.

"Kid is alive," Jimmy declared after a rapid check on his vital signs. "He's just unconscious…he must have hit his head when he fell."

Everyone drew a relieved breath, seeing Kid laying on the ground, covered with all that blood, had made them imagine the worst.

"What happened Rachel? Who were those men, and what did they have to do with Lou?"

"I..I don't…" Rachel was trembling, now that the tension and the fear for Agnes' life had begun to fade away she felt herself overly tired and unable to think straight.

"She's in shock right now, Jimmy, don't torment her with all these questions," Teaspoon finally intervened.

The Station Manager had used a harsher tone than he intended but situations like these required him to have cold blood and strong hand to guide his boys.

"Cody, bring Rachel and Agnes inside, and make her something hot to drink. Ike, run back to town and tell Emma and Sam what happened. Bring the doc when you come back!" he added yelling since Ike was already running to his mount.

"Buck, Jimmy, help me to bring Kid inside; we had to patch him until the doctor arrives."

"And Lou, Teaspoon?" Jimmy asked. "Those men have her! We have to run after those bastards!"

The old manager was torn; he couldn't stand the idea of Lou in their hands one minute more, but chasing two men in the middle of the night, without knowing anything about the attackers, could be foolish and dangerous, because they didn't know if there was an ambush waiting for them out there. Plus, he reasoned, if those man wanted to kill Louise, they wouldn't bring her away with them.

"It's night, Jimmy; and we have no idea of where they have gone. It's gonna be a useless chase," the man finally said.

"I can follow their tracks, the moon is full tonight," Buck stated securely, interrupting Teaspoon.

"And we'll be careful," Jimmy added.

Teaspoon looked at the rider suspiciously. Carefulness wasn't a word he usually associated with Hickock; but Buck was known to be more cautious and rational when need be, so the older man surrendered.

"Ok…" he said "But don't try anything foolish. Try to locate where those men are bringing Lou and then come back here. Don't intervene unless it's absolutely necessary." He looked straight in their eyes. "Don't make me worry about you two too," he concluded.

Buck and Jimmy nodded, but both of them knew that if Lou would be in danger, they wouldn't hesitate to do whatever was necessary in order to save her, regardless of how risky it could be.

"C'mon help me to bring Kid inside and you can leave as soon as the doctor arrives," Teaspoon sighed.

They laid the unconscious rider in the spare bed and then they hurried down the stairs to get their horses.

The station-manager went to the kitchen. He found Cody singing a funny lullaby to Agnes, cradling her in his arms, a bit awkward but very tender at the same time. Rachel was sitting with a cup of steaming chamomile-tea in her hands, she was still shaken but the sweet scene before her eyes had brought a small smile on her tired face.

"Rachel, are you ok?" Teaspoon asked.

Cody stopped his singing, startled by the man's voice, and tried to regain his composure embarrassed for being caught out of guard.

"I'm fine now. How is the Kid?" the woman asked worriedly.

"I stopped the bleeding, the wound isn't too bad. The doc will patch him in no time."

Rachel smiled tiredly. "And Lou?"

"Buck and Jimmy just rode out to find where they brought her."

"That man, Wicks, knew Lou…he said…he said that Lou belonged to him and he would make her repay him for something," she said, as she looked at the Station Master with scared eyes. "You must rescue her, Teaspoon, there's something horribly scary about that man..."

He laid a hand on the woman's shoulder. "We'll do it, Rachel, be sure of that."

Teaspoon spent almost the entire night awake. First the doctor came to visit Kid; as they'd already guessed, the Southerner's wound wasn't so bad and he wouldn't have even lost his senses if he hadn't hit his head. After that he had been able to send Cody and Ike to sleep, telling them they would be no use in rescuing Lou without a good night of rest.

Emma and Rachel were harder to convince; the red-head had returned to the station with the Doctor and insisted on assisting Kid through the night, whose sleep was pretty troubled despite the medicine the doctor gave him.

Rachel, on her part, was still shaken by what happened and refused to go in her room, hours later Teaspoon found her sleeping on the couch in the parlour with her baby still cradled in her arms. He didn't have the heart to wake her so he just covered mother and daughter with a quilt and settled himself on a nearby armchair, waiting for the dawn to break or for his boys to return.

Hours later he was woken by someone gently shaking his arm; he forced his eyes open only to find the tired faces of Buck and Jimmy staring him in the first light of the morning.

"Boys…" he muttered, his voice still sleepy. He straightened himself before to speak again. "Did you find something?"

The riders shook their heads sadly.

"We were able to follow the tracks until Curtis Wells, but then we lost them." Buck said.

"We camped there for the night and then we ran back here as soon as possible. How's the Kid?" Jimmy concluded.

"The doctor said it's nothing serious, a slight concussion and a wound on his left arm. He's been lucky."

"C'mon, let's go in the kitchen and try to sort out this mess before it's too late," he added, standing up a bit rigidly due to the awkward position he had sleep in.

Kid was woken by a sharp pain radiating through his arm. He opened his eyes, disoriented for a moment.

"Lou…" he muttered, "Louise…" he called with more urgency, the last thing he remembered was Lou being grabbed by Wicks.

He tried to get up but found himself falling against the pillow, light-headed from the loss of blood and the sudden movement.

The Southerner's calling woke Emma, who was napping in a rocking chair near the bed. Seeing Kid's agitated face and the way he was trying to get up, she immediately went to calm him down, because he could reopen his wound if he kept moving like that.

"Calm Kid, lie down or you'll hurt yourself again!"

But Kid didn't care about his wound in that moment, he was so worried he didn't even feel the pain.

"Let me up, Emma, please! You don't understand, Lou is in danger!!"

"Please Kid, lay down. Jimmy and Buck left yesterday night to look for Lou, wait at least until they return."

"I can't wait! You don't know what that man is capable of…"

Kid didn't want to imagine what would happen to his wife now that Wicks had her; if he even dared to touch her again…

"What's all this ruckus??" the station manager's voice interrupted the young man train of thoughts and Teaspoon, Buck and Jimmy appeared in the doorframe, drawn upstairs by the sudden noise coming from the room.

"Jimmy, Buck!" Kid immediately eyed his fellow riders. "Did you find her?" he asked hopefully, but his friends sadly shook their heads.

"Sorry Kid, we lost their tracks at Curtis Wells," Hickock responded.

"Curtis Wells," Kid murmured. That name was familiar to him, "Is it near Casper?" he asked.

Teaspoon nodded affirmatively. Kid remembered vaguely that Wicks owned another brothel in the Nebraska Territory, in the town of Casper, something he had won in a poker match. From what Kid knew Wicks rarely went there but the man must have decided to use it in the end.

"Then I know where that bastard brought her!" he said and tried again to get up, but this time Teaspoon stopped him with a firm hand on his shoulder.

"Kid, calm down. You can't ride. Tell us where Lou has been brought and I'll promise we'll bring her back to you safe and sound."

"No, you don't understand!" he said raising his voice in a desperate tone. "Wicks has my wife and it may already be too late!"

That latest outburst left everybody speechless.

"Wife?" Jimmy asked after some moments of stunned silence.

"Yes…wife," Kid responded quite sheepishly, realizing he had just given out their secret.

"Well, this explains the ring on your neck!" Teaspoon said with a wink. "Care to explain how and when all of this happened?"

Unconsciously Kid's hand clutched the wedding he wore on a chain under his shirt, just as Lou wore hers. He began to talk.

"We married during our last trip to St. Joe. I'm sorry we didn't tell you anything but the company doesn't allow marriage…"

"Especially when it involves two of its riders!" Cody exclaimed from the hallway, making everyone turn at the sound of his voice.

Cody and Ike were grinning openly at the door with a smiling Rachel just behind them.

"Well, now that we are all up," Teaspoon said with one last half smile, "tell us everything about your WIFE and that Wicks man. The more we know about him, the better will be for us." He concluded turning serious again.

Kid sighed, Teaspoon was right, if they had to go to save Lou then they had to know as much as possible about that monster, but he didn't want their family starting to look at Lou with different eyes once he said what there was in their past. He stood silent, pondering what he could say or not and finally started to speak.

He told them he had been hired by Wicks when he was just arrived from the Virginia and nobody else wanted to give him a job, that Lou had begun to work for him as a laundry girl more or less for the same reasons and how they managed to escape together when they understood that that bastard wanted to 'promote' Lou as one of his working girls. Emma and Rachel sucked their breaths at his words, they must have understood what way Wicks would have promoted Lou, but Kid didn't tell anything else about the circumstances that led to their escape in St Louis, he wouldn't betray Lou's trust about her secret.

"You know the rest, Lou and I tried to get a job in St Louis, we couldn't find it and we got separated, until we met again here in Sweetwater;" Kid concluded, "now please, let me up and let's go to look for Louise."

He got up from the bed, a bit pale and unsteady, but Teaspoon didn't say anything this time. He had recognized the resolute look on his boy's blue eyes and renounced to stop him. After all, if he were in his shoes, he would have done the same, the older man mused silently.

Lou cracked open her eyes, she had a splitting headache and even the dim light was enough to make her eyes hurt as if burning nails were being drilled in her orbits; moaning she closed her eyelids and only after several seconds she dared to open them again, blinking several times in order to clear her vision.

She was in a small room, she didn't recognize it but it was somewhat familiar to her. A dresser full of bottles and make-up, a heavy scent filling the hair, the big worn bed she was laying in…Lou was in a brothel room.

The girl's stomach clenched, her worst nightmare had become true: Wicks had found her again. Memories of what had happened came rushing to her mind: Wicks saying he would make her repay with interest, Agnes' desperate crying, Kid laying unmoving on the ground…she choked a sob.

In a rustle of red satin someone approached her bed.

"Charlotte…?" Lou whispered.

But it wasn't the sweet smile of her friend the one who appeared in front of her eyes, instead it was the hardened face of Cora Murphy.

"Charlotte is dead," she said.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

"Charlotte is dead," Cora said.

Lou gasped in shock and disbelief; despite the fact the girl hadn't seen her friend in years, the news hit her hard.

"How…When…" was all she could muster to say.

The blonde woman smirked grimly.

"When Wicks discovered you ran away, he got furious and beat Charlotte to death."

Lou's eyes filled with tears. Charlotte had been her only friend among Wicks' girls, she had protected her, shielding her from the reality of that place and then saved her, helping her to escape when the only thing she wanted to do was to die.

"It's not her you should be sorry about, Louise, but yourself." Cora said, startling Lou with her veiled menace.

None of his other "personal girls" had ever inspired such a violent craving in Wicks; maybe it was because Louise was the only one who had been able to escape from him, but the man had been obsessed by idea of having her again since the day Hank had seen her and Kid in St Joe.

"It's better you gave up. You can't win over him. Just grit your teeth and don't fight him. If you're lucky the bastard will get tired of you soon and you'll become just one of his whores, instead of his plaything," Cora said.

At her words a familiar dread crept over Lou's body. She had taken years to get over her nightmare and now it came crushing over her all at once, but she fought the fear.

"I'll never be one of his whores!" the girl exclaimed.

"I won't be so sure of that Louise," an icy voice said.

Wicks appeared at the door of the small room and the two women froze for a moment.

"Leave us alone, Cora," the man said to the prostitute.

The blonde hesitated for a moment, as she suddenly didn't want to leave Lou alone, but she couldn't do anything else than nod and sit up. Before leaving, Cora looked at Louise though, and for a moment the hardness in her grey eyes was replaced by a look of pity.

"Do as I said," she whispered. "Don't make it worse than it already is." And then she exited.

Lou's stomach was tied in a huge knot of fear and she had to make a physical effort not to tremble, but she stared defiantly at the man in front of her. She wouldn't do as Cora said. She wouldn't lie down and let Wicks have his way. She wasn't a scared little thirteen; she would fight with all of her forces. He may win over her at last, but she would never be one of his whores.

Lou lay on the bed immobile. Her face and body were bruised and battered, but more than anything else, her soul was broken. When Wicks attacked her, she tried to resist with all her strength, because she didn't want to give any satisfaction to the monster that was ravaging her; but finally she had called for her husband during her ordeal and it was then that Wicks had smiled cruelly to her.

"He can't hear you anymore, you little whore," he lied. "I personally made sure that nobody survived. It was a pity for the blonde, though. With a body like hers she would serve my business pretty well," he concluded with a smirk.

"You're lying!" Lou had screamed then, not wanting to believe his words.

"No I'm not. I killed your precious Kid, the woman and also the little brat. Nobody knows where you are and nobody will save you this time. You're mine Louise."

"You monster!" Lou had sobbed, fighting him with the sheer force of her desperation.

But then, what was there to fight for? Kid was dead and two other innocent people were killed because of her; nobody knew where she was and, even if her fellow riders were looking for her, they probably would never find her without any leads to follow. Why should she bother to fight Wicks or even to try to survive? Thoughts of salvaging the shreds of her dignity; of refusing to let Wicks win over her; and even of clinging to the promise she'd made to Jeremiah and Theresa, flickered in turn through her mind. But it wasn't enough now that her worst nightmare had come true. Wicks was too much stronger than her, sooner or later he would break past her defenses anyway, so what was the use of fighting? He killed her husband and with him all the dreams she had.

The fight left her at last and finally Lou did as Cora said, she gritted her teeth and hoped everything would finish soon. Now she lay there, her spirit broken, feeling dirtier than she had ever felt before and for the second time in her life, the only thing she wanted was to die.

Cora closed the door behind her with a resigned sigh. The woman had brought Louise her lunch but the girl didn't touch it, she refused to eat anything from the moment of her arrival. What did she want to do, starve herself to death? Probably it was exactly was she was trying to do, the blonde woman mused.

When Wicks had done with his new toy and called her to clean and feed her, Cora had come to Louise's room and found her lying on her side with her back to the door, with her arms and legs crossed before her, staring emotionless at the wall. The girl didn't give any sign to have heard her nor did she stir when the woman began to clean the cuts and the bruises.

Cora worked in silence, because it would be hypocritical trying to comfort her. What could she say to her: everything will be fine? Your Kid will come to save you? Kid was dead and nothing would ever be the same.

Cora wasn't mean or cruel, she was just realistic. After Wicks every man would consider Louise nothing more than a whore. If she was lucky, she would learn how to use her body to have what she wanted, but Cora doubted Louise would ever been able to settle for that kind of life. She was too proud and independent, or maybe she respected herself too much to let someone use her in any way. Maybe it really would be better if she died rather than to face that kind of life.

Kid gritted his teeth in pain while he halted his horse. The wound had reopened, despite the fact they had bandaged it tightly and put on the liniment the doctor gave him, but the young rider ignored it. He didn't know the first thing about Casper and he needed to concentrate if he wanted to find Louise.

His friends stopped near him and together they tried to decide what was the best plan to find Lou. Casper wasn't a big city but it was surely bigger than Sweetwater and therefore it may be possible there was more than one brothel. They could only hope they were located all in the same part of the town, how it usually happened, so they could control all of them more easily.

They stood there a bit uncertain about how to find the right section of town, but Cody solved the problem going to ask a passer-by where a young man just arrived in the town could entertain himself. The others had been taken aback by their friend's cheek; but apparently it wasn't the first time Cody asked for such information, because he had immediately detected the right person to speak to: a young ranch-hand who eagerly indicated where those kind of establishments were.

"Well…what are you staring at me for?" Cody asked a bit puzzled when he came back to his friends, "Tommy Knox, over there, has been so nice to say me where to go and he had talked about a particularly refined place, one he couldn't afford, because the girls come directly from St Joe. What do you say, could it be the place we are looking for?" Cody concluded with a wink.

"Tell us where it is," Kid said tensely.

He didn't have the time for Cody's wisecracks right now. Her wife was near and he wanted to find her.

Kid and the others stood before the line of brothels and saloons, unsure of what to do. They surely couldn't step into one of those places and ask for a petite girl with short hair and male clothes who had just been brought there. It would be the best way to get shot.

"It's better we separate. The brothel that Tommy talked about should be the biggest one over there, but it's better not take any chance and to cover them all, what do you think?" Jimmy said.

His friends readily agreed and rapidly they divided in groups to look at the different places. They didn't know exactly what to look for, but each one of them was hoping to find something that could help them to find Lou.

Kid followed Jimmy into the biggest brothel, grateful that Jimmy had taken matters in his hands, because he couldn't think straight. Now that Lou was near the only thing the Southerner wanted to do was burst into that place and rescue his wife ready to kill whoever opposed him. His friend must have sensed his mood because as soon as they stepped inside Kid felt his hand grab his shoulder.

"Kid, now it's better we split up, but you must promise me something, ok? That whatever happens you'll stay calm, I want to kill that bastard almost as much as you but now the most important thing is to save Lou, and we won't able to do that if you get yourself shot, ok?"

Kid turned to look at him in the eyes, Jimmy had understood perfectly what he was feeling in that moment. If he had seen Wicks he would kill him without a second thought, but his friend was right. First of all they have to find Louise, there would be time later for vengeance.

Cora recognized him as soon as he entered in the crowded room. The shy, cute, Southern boy was grown up into quite a good-looking man and the blue eyes she remembered were now hard as steel while he looked around the place. The woman smirked; Wicks was lying after all, he couldn't kill Kid this time either.

She slowly crossed the room and reached the bar. The brown-haired guy who entered with Kid was leaning over the counter, a few steps from her. Jimmy looked as if he was just having a drink, but his eyes were carefully scanning the people around him. Cora observed him for a while, pondering her options.

She had no intention to go and tell Wicks what she had seen, that bastard might be her boss but Cora had still enough self-respect not to become one of his hanger-on. But on the other hand she had everything to lose by helping Kid; so she stood there, seriously thinking about turning on her heels and continuing her shift as if she had seen nothing. But as much as she tried Cora Murphy couldn't wipe away from her memory the blank expression on Louise's battered face.

She had seen so many girls like her, and nobody ever came to save them. But that insignificant little mouse of Louise McCloud had someone who cared about her enough to come there to rescue her. The prostitute envied her, what had that girl so special about her? Nobody had ever come for her, or Sally or Charlotte; but Kid came for Louise and, despite all her reasoning, the blonde prostitute found herself turning toward Jimmy and approaching him.

"Hey good-looking," she drawled in her best seductive voice, "don't you want to offer something to drink to a lady?"

Jimmy turned to look at who had called him and saw a blonde woman smirking appreciatively at him. She was over thirty, that's for sure, maybe even more, but the satin dress and the make-up on her face were accurate and elegant enough to hide her real age, at least at first sight. That Tommy was right, that brothel was more refined than the others that usually can be found out there in the West. The woman before him must be one of the most high-ranked prostitutes of the whole bunch and probably she knew what happened in that place better than the most of the other girls. Talking with her could be very helpful, if he pulled the right strings, but it could be also very dangerous, because he didn't know how faithful she was to her boss.

"Sure," he responded taking his chance.

"So… it true what they said…that this place is the most expensive because you all come from St Joe?" Jimmy asked casually after a while.

"Well…I came from St Joe and my boss Mr. Wicks too, that's enough for you cowboy?"

Cora had understood what that young man was doing and, even she didn't care if she gave away Wicks' plan, at the same time she knew that everyone could overhear their conversation and therefore she didn't want to take any chance, talking too clearly.

Jimmy on his part, was thrilled to hear those words. They were in the right place, now they just had to find where Lou was. Keeping his stone façade he smirked at the woman and leaned toward her.

"Maybe…" he whispered, leaning toward her.

Cora hugged him close, passing her arms under his jacket to feel his muscles.

"I'm on the second floor, last room down the hallway if you're interested," she breathed.

The woman closed the distance between them, brazenly trailing her hands towards his waist and buttocks before releasing him and stepping away.

"See you later then…" she concluded and then she left, disappearing among the crowd. She surely would have enjoyed a ride with a handsome young man like that, Cora mused to herself smirking.

Jimmy stood still for a moment, that woman might be too old for his taste, but she surely knew how to touch a man and he needed a little more time to regain his composure, before going to Kid and tell him what he discovered. He took a deep breath and thrust his hands in his jacket, and then he noticed there was something in his pocket. He pulled out whatever was in there and gasped out in shock. In his hand there was a wedding ring on a chain, very similar to the one hung around Kid's neck, but smaller.

Can it be possible that woman knew Lou? Did she see Kid with him and now she was trying to help them? What if instead it was Wicks' trick? Or maybe that woman was really a friend of Lou. Kid told them there was a prostitute called Charlotte who befriended them when they stayed at Wicks' brothel…

One thing was sure; he had to find Kid as soon as possible.

Kid recognized immediately the ring when Jimmy showed it to him, beginning to ask a million questions at a time. He was so agitated the dark-haired rider had to bring him away so no one would notice them.

"Who gave this to you?" Kid asked for the umpteenth time when they finally got outside.

"I already told you, Kid. She was a prostitute, she didn't tell me her name."

"Was she a brunette? Kind smile, green eyes…?" if the woman who gave Jimmy the ring was Charlotte, then there were good chances to bring Louise out of there safely.

"No," Jimmy shook his head, "that woman was completely different. Over thirty with blonde hair and gray eyes."

"Cora…" Kid said then.

He perfectly remembered her. Louise had always been somewhat afraid of her, because she was quite a hard and cynical woman; but Cora Murphy had never been mean to Lou as the other girls were, she basically thought only about her business and didn't meddle with the other girls' quarrels. Kid remembered also another thing, though: Cora hated Wicks. The young Southerner didn't know exactly what kind of relationship Cora had had with poor Sally, but he knew Cora had never forgiven Wicks for the death of her younger friend.

There was a tiny hope then, thought Kid. Cora had never felt a particular affection for Louise, but Kid was sure she would never help Wicks in anything.

"Let's go to find the others, Jimmy." Kid said finally.

A few minutes later all the riders were reunited in the small livery where they had left the horses. Jimmy was briefly explaining what had happened in the saloon while Kid paced nervously in a corner of the stable, clutching Lou's ring so hard it almost hurt. When finally Jimmy finished talking Kid spoke.

"I know Cora, she may not be Lou's friend, but she would never help Wicks. So I say, let's go to check her room, I'm sure Louise would be near."

"How can you be sure it's not a trick?"

"I know her Jimmy, she hates Wicks. If she gave the ring to you it was because she wanted to let you know Lou was there. She may have seen me."

Jimmy looked unconvinced at his friend. In his opinion there were too many "ifs"; but that was the only chance to find Lou and for her and Kid's sake the young gunslinger was willing to take the risk.

"Ok," he said then, "but it's better you wait outside while a couple of us go and check the room."

"What? No!" the young man exclaimed, "Lou can be wounded or…" his voice hitched, "or worse, and she wouldn't want any of you to see her like that."

The others couldn't deny the truths behind his words, nobody knew what had happened to Lou while she was in Wicks' hands, even if all of them could well imagine what a monster like him could do to a girl.

"Kid…you are too easy of a target," Buck tried to reason, he could only imagine his friend's anguish but if that Cora woman recognized him, then every other man working for Wicks could. "You've been lucky in that saloon, but if you'll go there again, there are good chances that someone else than Cora saw you, and in that case you'll be shot in no time."

"Buck's right, Kid." Cody agreed, "I know it's difficult, but for this time let us do the rescue. We'll bring you Louise to you, I promise that."

Ike grabbed his shoulder in a compassionate gesture and Kid knew in that moment he had been defeated, he look around at their serious faces and saw worry and deep care behind their eyes. He could protest as much as he wanted but his friends wouldn't let him go and risk his life, even if they had to close him in one of the stalls. Despite of all his worries Kid found himself smiling then, he was very lucky to have friends like them.

"Ok you won," the young Southerner said at last, "tell me what's your plan."


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter**** 15**

Kid stood tensely in the alley behind the brothel; he was with Ike, near the horses, while Buck was lazily leaning on the wall on the other end of the passage. He looked as if he was just waiting to enter the establishment; but actually all three riders were observing the windows of the first floor on both sides of the building, waiting for a signal from Cody and Jimmy.

By an unsaid agreement the riders decided not to leave Kid alone; the young Southerner was on the verge of the breakdown and his reactions were unpredictable. By now every one of them knew that all their blue-eyed friend's rationality and sense got lost when Lou was concerned. If he only would catch a glimpse of Wicks, Kid would try to kill him not caring about the consequences, the boys were sure.

Ike and Buck shared a worried glance at a distance. Kid looked pointedly at the windows of the first floor, with his teeth gritted and expression so tense you could have said his life was depending on it. But in a way that was true, because if something really bad happened to Lou, then Kid's life would be destroyed as well.

"Ready for the show, Cody?" Jimmy whispered to the blonde rider just before stepping into the saloon.

"Sure," he smirked and opened the bottle of cheap whiskey they brought with them.

They poured the amber liquid on their shirtfronts and went inside, staggering and clinging to each other as if they were drunk. In this case, even if someone caught them in a forbidden area, they could always say they were too inebriated to understand where they were.

They crossed the crowded room and reached the staircase leading to the girls' rooms. As soon as they were upstairs they straightened themselves, their eyes sharp and attentive again.

"You said she was in the last room, right?" Cody asked again.

"Yes, let's hope that woman hasn't tricked me, keep your gun ready anyway," the dark-haired gunslinger responded.

They rapidly reached the end of the hallway, slowing their pace only when some client or prostitute crossed their path. The half-dazed expressions they wore and the strong smell of alcohol made them appear harmless and at the same time repulsive enough to prevent the men from taking notice of them and the girls from trying any approach.

When the two riders finally reached the last door they stopped for a moment, afraid of what they would find inside. They could only imagine what that man did to Lou, but the pained anguished look on Kid's face earlier didn't make them expect anything good.

With a last glance to Cody, Jimmy knocked at the door.

"Who is it?" Cora asked from inside.

"Darling, it's Jimmy" the rider said with a slurred voice, "we met before at the bar, remember?"

The woman stood behind the closed door, uncertain. She had slipped Lou's ring in that young man's pocket and she had indicated him the right room to look in, but now she wasn't so sure anymore she wanted to help them. It'd be a lot safer for her if she didn't let him enter, after all she didn't want to end up like Charlotte. But in the end Cora couldn't ignore the small, battered figure lying in the bed behind her.

"I'm gonna regret this," she muttered to herself before opening the door.

Jimmy stepped inside as soon as the door creaked open, closing a hand around Cora's mouth and pointing his gun against her side in the process. He still didn't trust the woman completely and he didn't want to take any chances. Cody entered, gun at hand, right behind his friend and then he locked the door.

At first they didn't see anyone in the room other than the prostitute, but then they noticed a small bulge on the far end of the bed, and they stopped in their tracks at the sight of the brown-haired head peeking under the blanket.

"You brute! Let me go!" Cora spit out when Jimmy's grasp on her loosened. "I'm helping you and this is what I get?!"

She freed herself from the rider's hands and went to the bed.

"Louise," she called "there's someone for you…"

"No please, not again…" a tiny voice responded.

Both Cody and Jimmy's hearts wrung in pain at the sound of that trembling, broken voice. Neither of them had ever heard Lou so vulnerable, not even when she was worried about Kid's life. What did that man do to her?

"Lou…" Jimmy approached her and gently laid a hand on her shoulder, but the girl flinched at his touch and curled in herself even more.

"Lou, it's Jimmy…you're safe now," he tried to comfort her, caressing her from above the blanket, but still she remained tense as a spring and still didn't turn toward him.

"Kid…" she called.

"Hush...we'll bring you to him soon…" Jimmy soothed her while leaned toward the bed to take the girl in his arms, but Lou continued to cry and call for Kid as if she didn't hear him, trying ineffectively to fight against him.

When the young gunslinger saw his friend's face he gasped in shock, it was swollen with bruises, and on her neck and shoulders there were clear signs of scratches. A sudden wave of rage engulfed his heart and he instinctively clasped her to his chest.

"What the hell did that bastard do to her?!" he hissed.

"What do you think, cowboy?" Cora retorted.

She was still angry about how he treated her; didn't they understand she was risking her life?

"It's better you hurry up," she added briskly, "I don't want to be here when Wicks returns."

"You don't want what?!" Cody exclaimed.

"I'll come with you. I don't want to stay here. You owe me that." she concluded looking straight at the blonde rider.

"You're crazy, woman! We can't bring you with us!"

"Stop, you two!" Jimmy said.

"Cody, look where Kid and the others are; and Cora, help me with Lou."

He swallowed, he had seen the signs of that man fingers on her. He could perfectly understand Kid's feeling in that moment. He himself felt like killing Wicks with his bare hands right now.

Buck saw the movement at one of the windows, for a second Cody's face was illuminated by the light of a match. It was the signal they had found Lou and they were ready to bring her away. The room faced on the main street but fortunately it was a pretty dark night and the brothel was fine enough not to have girls and customers hanging outside the building. With a bit of luck Cody and Jimmy would be able to exit from the window and climb down the porch unnoticed.

He let out a low whistle and when Ike turned to him, the Kiowa rider beckoned him and Kid with his hand.

"They found her…" he whispered, "they are on the first window on the left, right over our heads."

"There they are!" Kid exclaimed, interrupting his friend's words.

In that moment, in fact, the window Buck indicated opened. Cody exited first with the gun in his hand, ready to shoot. Jimmy followed him with Lou in his arms. She was wrapped in a blanket, and they could make out only her brown head and tiny bare feet. Ike and Buck were surprised to see a blonde prostitute following next. They figured Jimmy and Cody had been forced to bring her with them and that could be a problem, because they needed to get away fast.

Kid, instead, couldn't care less about Cora's presence; all his attention was focused on the bundle in Jimmy's arms. Why did he have to carry her? Did Wicks hurt Lou so bad she couldn't even walk by herself? His heart was pounding in his chest so hard it was reverberating in his ears. He rapidly placed a barrel under the porch so his friends could climb down more easily. As soon as Jimmy was on the ground, Kid reached for Lou, barely giving to him the time to get down off the porch.

As soon as his wife was securely in his arms, Kid clutched her to his chest. He didn't have the nerve to examine her body right now, the bruises on her face were enough to make him sick and angry at the same time, so he limited himself to kiss her forehead, murmuring words of comfort in her ear. When Lou didn't react to him, he got scared.

"She doesn't hear me! Why doesn't she hear me??!" he exclaimed frantically.

"She is too weak ; the fool hasn't eaten anything since she got here." Cora responded to him.

Buck had helped Cora get down from the porch, but nobody had looked at her since then; all of them were focused on Louise.

At Cora's word, Kid looked attentively at Lou, she was pale under the bruises and the lips were dry and cracked.

"Why the hell didn't you feed her?!" Kid asked angrily.

"I BROUGHT her food," Cora stated indignantly, "she didn't want to eat."

"But why…"

"She thought you were dead, Wicks told her so and she was so desperate she wanted to die."

"That bastard! I'll kill him!" Kid exclaimed, furious.

He unconsciously tightened the hold on Lou and the girl let out a feeble moan.

"Lou…" he whispered then, all his rage suddenly replaced by worry.

"C'mon Kid, let's go. The sooner we leave, the better."

Kid nodded a bit reluctantly, because he wanted his revenge on Wicks, but Lou's well being was more important in that moment so they went on the horses and quickly left.

******

Louise stirred slightly, the cold air of the night brushed against her cheeks, making her regain a bit of consciousness. In her slumber she understood she was on a horse and encircled by strong, but gentle, arms. The familiar scent surrounding her made her eyes sting with tears, it couldn't be possible, she said to herself, Kid was dead. She herself had seen him fall in a pool of blood.

"Kid…" she whispered.

The arms tightened around her and the horse slowed abruptly.

"Lou…" his voice called her. Louise thought she was dreaming, but the calling continued, hopeful but still worried. She finally opened her eyes; she was sitting in front of Kid, still wrapped around in a blanket, snuggled comfortably on his lap, with her legs hanging on a one side. The girl turned up her head to find the blue eyes she loved the most staring back at her.

"Louise!" he choked, stopping Katy completely.

"K-Kid, Kid…I thought, Wicks told…" she blabbed, still incredulous, until he crushed her against his chest, murmuring soothing nonsense in her ear.

She started to cry then, soon followed by Kid, the couple clung to each other desperately, unaware of the others who had stopped too, and letting the fear and the tension fade away with the tears they shed.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

"Lou, dear, the bath is ready."

The girl nodded at Emma's words, spoken with a low and gentle tone, and rose from the settee where she had been sitting since the moment they came back home. The worried and sympathetic glances her friends kept throwing at her and all the fussing of the two station-mothers made her feel like suffocating. Lou felt sick and dirty and, as much as she loved her family, right then she wanted only to crawl in a dark hole where nobody could see her.

Fortunately Rachel and Emma were sensitive enough to understand her frame of mind, so they had sent all the boys and Teaspoon to sleep while they went to the kitchen to prepare the bath and something to eat. Only Kid had remained with her and so Lou stayed curled in her husband's embrace, hiding her face in the crook of his neck like a little girl, not moving, not uttering a single word, until Emma called her.

When Louise got up Kid followed suit, but the girl stopped him.

"Don't come," she said in a whisper, not looking at him, "I don't want anybody."

Kid's heart crushed at her words, but he shook his head when Rachel started to protest.

******

Louise stepped in the kitchen, closing the door behind her. Going near the tub she took off the blanket she still was wrapped in and then she began to unbutton the shirt Jimmy had covered her with.

As soon as she laid her eyes on the marks Wicks left on her, she shut her eyes. Unwillingly the images of what that man did came again to her mind and she felt like throwing up. She hurried herself in the hot water and began to scrub herself with all of her force, despite the pain it caused on her tender and bruised skin, until she burst out in a deep sob and began to cry.

******

Afterward the girl refused the soft cotton nightgown they prepared for her, preferring the security her old long-johns gave her. In the following days she wasn't able to sleep without Kid being in the same room with her, but at the same time she didn't let him see her undressed and couldn't stand his close proximity. All of this was a torment for the young man, because Louise had gotten back to the time of their escape in St Louis, closed in herself and afraid to go out of the room.

Kid's heart was burning with rage. He hadn't been able to protect Lou from Wicks, not even this time. He wanted to kill that man, but he didn't dare to leave the station. After her ordeal, in fact, Lou had developed an irrational fear of losing him and she couldn't stand to have her husband out of her sight.

The situation was taking its toll on the other riders too. The boys couldn't stand to see the once spirited Louise so weak and fearful, nor the lines of worry aging Kid's face. Hickock had even offered to kill Wicks for Kid. He was utterly serious when he talked and the Virginian was tempted to accept his offer. But he didn't want Jimmy to become an assassin for his and Lou's sake, nor could he permit him to risk his life.

He was the one who had to kill Wicks, and nobody else; he should have done it many years ago, in St Joseph, and now he wanted to correct his mistake. Unfortunately the man seemed to have dropped from the face of the Earth, the boys had looked for him in Casper and even in St Joe, but they couldn't find any trace.

******

"Jimmy," Kid called "I want to go in town, can you do me a favor ?"

"Sure, what? Do you want me to come with you?" the brown-haired rider responded to his friend. Kid had a determined look on his face and Jimmy was afraid he wanted to do something stupid.

"I want to go to the saloon. Don't worry," he added when he saw Jimmy's expression. "I just want to talk with Cora. I want to find out if Wicks has another hideout. I want to find him, Jimmy. I have to. Lou wouldn't recover until that bastard is behind bars, or dead," he concluded with a cold glint in his eyes.

Kid was right, Jimmy thought, Lou wouldn't ever get a chance to recover as long as she'd fear that Wicks would come back in her life; the only way to avoid this, was to arrest Wicks or kill him, and Jimmy was sure Kid wouldn't be so strict in following the law this time.

"Don't worry, Kid, I'll keep an eye on Lou. But don't stay away too long."

******

Jimmy knocked lightly at Lou's door and when he heard a slight anxious tone in the quiet 'come in' the girl said, he hurried to enter. He found Lou at her usual spot, huddled in the rocking chair near the window. It had become a habit for her to spend the days there, looking out at the various activities of the station.

At first nobody found it strange, considering what she had to endure and her wounds. But she was healed now and still she didn't show any intention to leave the room or to start her normal activities. Teaspoon wouldn't have let her ride alone, considering that Wicks was still lurking somewhere, but everyone thought that she would – at least – start to show a bit of distress, being cooped in that room for so long. Instead Lou showed no desire to go out and the only times she went outside she was with Kid and she didn't go farther than the porch.

"Jimmy," Lou called the rider when he went to her, "Jimmy, where's Kid?" she asked, wringing her wrists anxiously, "I don't see him, where's Kid?" she repeated.

She was on the verge of a breakdown and the rider was shocked to see her like that.

"Lou, sweetie, Kid has gone to town, he has some errands to do but he'll be back as soon as possible," he tried to calm her.

"To town? Why? It's dangerous, why did he go. Doesn't he remember what happened the last time he went to town?" her voice was almost hysterical now, "he'll be shot again…"

"Lou, Kid's gone to Sweetwater. It's safe there, Sam and Emma are there, don't worry."

But the girl was clearly disoriented, because she continued to repeat that Kid was in danger, that Sweetwater wasn't safe, that she wanted Kid. "Nowhere is safe…" she started to sob at last.

Jimmy didn't know what to do, he gathered her in his arms.

"Hush…Lou, we can go to town together if you want. I'll protect you."

'_Damn Kid_', he cursed mentally, '_why the hell did you leave her alone?_'. But he actually wasn't angry with Kid. He was angry at that monster who reduced Lou like this.

When Kid came back, Jimmy and Rachel had finally been able to calm Lou and the rider found his wife laying in bed, with the station-mistress gently stroking her head and a pot of fuming chamomile tea on the nightstand.

"Where the hell have you been?" Jimmy muttered darkly when the blue eyed rider entered in the room.

"In town, like I told you. I've been away just a couple of hours, what's happened?" he asked, throwing a worried glance to Lou and rapidly going near her.

"She had a fit when she noticed you weren't at the station; I couldn't calm her, she kept saying you were in danger and no place was safe."

"Damn," Kid swore under his breath and bent toward the figure huddled under the blankets.

"Lou, honey," he soothingly called, "I'm here."

"Kid?" the girl opened her sleepy eyes, "Oh Kid I was so worried…" she opened her arms to him and the rider embraced her.

"I'm here Lou, I'm safe," he continued to whisper.

He made her lie down on the bed again and then he lay beside her, still fully dressed and outside the covers. Jimmy and Rachel left the room but exchanged a worried glance at the sight of Kid's distressed face. It couldn't go on like this, that situation was going to destroy both of them, but unfortunately nobody seemed to be able to help the young couple.

******

Kid continued to stroke Lou's back and shoulders until she relaxed completely. She felt so small in his arms, the young man reflected. She hadn't eaten properly since she got back, being always cooped up in that room had made her pale and weak.

"You should leave me, Kid." Suddenly, Lou's tiny and cracked voice interrupted his train of thought.

"Sorry," the young man immediately let go of her, his heart breaking at his wife's refusal of his closeness.

"No," she said raising her head to look at him in the eyes, "I mean you should divorce me."

"Lou, what are you saying?!" he exclaimed, grabbing her shoulders.

Her expression crumbled, "You deserve someone better than a wife who can't even let her husband look at her, but panics every time he's away," she wailed.

"I don't want to hear such a thing!" he responded fiercely, "We'll live as brother and sister, if it's what you want, but don't you dare say I should leave you. You hear me?"

Lou blinked and stopped crying, too stunned by Kid's vehement affirmation. Had Kid really said that? Was he really going to make such a sacrifice for her sake?

"Kid, you don't have to…"

"I love you, Louise, this is the only thing that matters to me," he softly interrupted her. "And you love me back, right?" he asked, looking her in the eyes.

"Yes, I love you too," she responded, "But it's so difficult…" her voice cracked again.

"I know Lou, I know," he responded, returning to embrace her.

It can't keep going like this, Kid thought wearily, Lou was breaking down and the rider was afraid he would lose her forever if he didn't do something.

'_But I finally found the solution to all our problems'_ he thought coldly; after his talk with Cora he had been a bit uncertain about what to do, but seeing his wife like this spurred him to a decision: the Wicks question had to be solved once and for all, and now Kid knew what he had to do.

******

The following morning Lou woke up in an empty bed; an involuntary twitch of fear constricted her heart, but she fought it back. "_Kid must be downstairs_" she reasoned, "_or doing his morning chores_."

On some level, Lou recognized that her behavior was irrational, but there were some moments that the panic overwhelmed her and she wasn't able to fight it. Just the notion that Kid wasn't near made horrible images come to her mind: the foreman telling her Kid was drowned, him lying unconscious in that whorehouse in Prosperity, Wicks cruelly saying her he had killed the love of her life. And then forcing her as he pleased.

She shook her head to dispel those memories, rose from her bed and took her robe; as usual, Kid's side was already made; only some wrinkles showed that someone had been there. It was because, as every other night, he hadn't truly slept there, he confined himself to sleeping on top of the covers.

Lou sighed sadly; it was her fault that her husband couldn't have a proper place to sleep, and still he declared his love for her. New tears clouded her eyes, why wasn't she able to let Kid love her right and make all her pains and fears disappear?

Straightening the blankets, she noticed a small folded note on Kid's pillow. Immediately she opened it:

_Dear Louise,_

_Please forgive me if I scared you again. I'm going to solve the source of all our problems. I promise everything will be better then._

_With all of my love,_

_Kid._

A strangled scream rose in her throat and she covered her mouth, horrified. The source of all our problems? Wicks! What the hell did Kid want to do?

She dashed out of the room and down the stairs.

"Rachel, Emma!" she called.

The two women appeared on the threshold of the kitchen where they were preparing the breakfast, looking at her with a scared expression.

"Louise, what's happened?"

"It's Kid. He's gone away…oh God…I'm afraid he wants to do something foolish…"

"Calm down, honey." Rachel tried to reassure her, "maybe he's just gone to ride a little before breakfast…"

"No…no, he left me a note. He said he wanted to solve the source of all our problems. Oh God…" she repeated and she slumped down on a chair.

"Maybe the boys know something about this!" she exclaimed after a moment.

Without even bothering to close her robe or to put something on her feet, the girl ran out of the kitchen and through the yard to reach the bunkhouse, leaving the two women bewildered and worried.

******

"Boys! Boys!" Lou called, pounding unceremoniously at the bunkhouse's door.

A surprised Buck opened the door, and Lou burst inside, not caring if her friends were still half-asleep and half-dressed.

"Where's Kid? Anyone know where Kid is?"

The riders stared at her speechlessly. They were dumbfounded to see Lou, the same girl that until the previous day couldn't even leave her room alone, staring at them with her fists on her hips and nothing more than longjohns and an open robe on her.

"Lou, maybe he's just gone to ride a little," Noah tried to reason.

"No! He left a note, he went to look for Wicks, I'm sure of that. Do any of you know something?"

She looked around the room, scanning her friends' faces; they were looking at her a bit warily, worried that she was overreacting again and she would have another crisis like the previous day. How could she blame them? Lou thought bitterly; after all, yesterday the mere notion Kid was in town sent her into a panic attack; but in that moment she was lucid, terrified, but lucid.

"Jimmy, you know something, don't you?" she said when she saw her brown-haired friend's expression. "Jimmy??" she prodded when he didn't respond.

"Yesterday he went to talk to Cora," he said at last. "I don't know anything else, I'm sorry."

"I have to talk with her then! She must know where Kid is headed. I – I want to go to town…" she concluded, surprising everyone.

"Are you sure, Lou?" Jimmy asked worriedly.

"T_he mere thought makes my knees tremble," _she wanted to say; "Yes, I am," she replied instead.

"I'll come with you, then," the rider responded.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter**** 17**

As they approached the town Lou was feeling more and more anxious, and when the first buildings came in sight her hands were covered in sweat and her stomach tied in a knot. Jimmy glanced worriedly at her every now and then but he didn't say anything during the entire ride.

"You can wait for me here," he said at last, "I'll be back in few minutes, just the time to talk with Cora."

"No thanks, Jimmy," Lou responded, "I want to come."

She stretched a smile in her friend's direction and then she nudged Lighting toward the saloon. She had set her mind on following Kid wherever he had gone, so she couldn't refrain from going in a familiar place like Sweetwater's saloon, even if right now it brought her memories she didn't want to think about.

Fortunately the Wild Horse was quiet at that time of the day, and just few clients were sitting here and there at the tables, while the girls lazily passed around taking the orders. As soon as Jimmy spotted Cora they approached her.

"Hey, handsome, you finally want to make that ride with me?" the blonde woman said seductively when she saw Jimmy coming toward her.

"We came to ask about Kid," the young man responded ignoring the remark.

"We?" she said raising an eyebrow, but then she noticed Lou, dwarfed in man's clothes, almost hidden behind Jimmy.

"Oh, Louise," she addressed her.

She didn't look well, the older woman thought, pale and thin, with a haunted look on her face. She had come back to her family and they were taking care of her. It was more than any of Wicks' other victims had ever had, so why the heck didn't she just try to forget what happened to her and go on with her life?

"What is that long face, girl? Are you expectin'?" Cora asked bluntly.

"What ?! No!" A shocked Lou responded.

"Then why do you look so run down? You've got a bunch of people taking care of you, plus a husband that would give his life for you. Don't you think you should show a bit of gratitude??"

"Mind your own business, Cora. You don't know what you're talking about," Jimmy replied sharply.

"Yes I do. I'm the one who worked for that man over the last ten years," she responded irritated, "I know what I'm talking about. She has been lucky and she should be more thankful, instead of feel so sorry for herself," the woman concluded looking the rider straight in the eyes.

Lou cringed at her words, Cora was right, she had had someone who cared and loved her enough to come and save her, not everyone had had her luck. She had a family and a husband who loved her more than anything and would do everything for her sake; she should start to focus on that. She couldn't forget what Wicks did to her, but she must not let it ruin her life. Lou wasn't sure if she would ever able to completely overcome what happened that night, but she had to try as hard as she could, she owed to Kid and the others that much.

"Where did Kid go?" she asked then, fearing the answer.

******

Jimmy and Lou flew across the prairie. Cora told them the town where Kid was headed and they wanted to reach him before it was too late. The girl knew perfectly what her husband wanted to do: to find Wicks and then kill him. Kid had reached the point he didn't care anymore about the consequences of his actions, but Lou did.

Going alone to Wicks' hideout would mean to risk the life, and Lou didn't want that. It was her fault Kid had reached that breaking point. She had worried him sick, and she didn't let anyone to help her. She refused to see the doctor and she insisted that nobody would press the charges against Wicks.

It would have been easier for her friends to find Wicks if he was a wanted man, but she simply felt too distressed and weak to even think about a trial. She didn't want to face him ever again, not even in a court. Lou wanted only to forget about him, but if this meant Kid to be in danger, then she was ready to do whatever was in her power to keep him safe, even to charge Wicks and blow her secret.

It was late afternoon when they finally reached the town of Fairview. Kid had a start of several hours over them and Lou feared he had already done what he had gone for.

"If he put himself in trouble I swear I'll never forgive him." she muttered angrily, feeling her throat tighten and the familiar trembling started again.

"Don't worry Lou, I'll kick his butt from here to Sweetwater if it'll keep him from doing something stupid," Jimmy smirked with a security he didn't really feel. "Your man has big heart but not a big brain, at least not when you're concerned."

He winked at her but Lou barely returned his smile.

"Let's go, Jimmy," she said curtly.

******

It wasn't a big town but surely was bigger than Sweetwater, so it took a while for the two friends to search in all the streets for any sign of Kid or Wicks. Neither of them was signed in any of the hotels of the town, so they started to go through the saloons and the other places of entertainment. Lou felt like throwing up at the mere sight of one of those establishments, but she gritted her teeth and focused her mind only on her husband.

At nightfall she was so exhausted she didn't even have the force to pay attention to the rowdy customers, the heavy smell of liquor and cheap perfume, the loud music, all the reminders of her ordeal that were scattered all around. She wanted only to find Kid, bite his head off for scaring her like that, and bring him home safe and sound.

"Huff…" she exhaled, dropping herself on the steps of the nearest porch. They were in the middle of the liveliest street of that damned down, that was becoming more and more crowded with the end of the day. That was the most suitable place where they could find Wicks, and therefore Kid, but she and Jimmy still hadn't found any trace of them.

"This time Kid has really messed himself up, when I'll find him…"

Jimmy's chuckled at Lou's menacing tone. "Glad to hear you so motivated, Lou," he said sitting near her. "We were starting to miss your outbursts," he concluded, ruffling affectionately ruffling her hair.

The girl smiled weakly at him. He was right, that was the first time she felt her old self again since Wicks. She would have preferred the reason wasn't Kid being in danger, but she had to admit that, even if she was worried and anxious, she had never felt so alive in a long time.

Suddenly Lou spotted a familiar blue coat among the people filling the street. She straightened up, trying to have a better view of the man, even if her heart already knew the truth.

As if in a slow motion Lou saw Kid took his gun and point it ahead of him. She looked in the direction he was pointing and saw a familiar well dressed man walking toward Kid with two men that clearly were his henchmen by his side. Her stomach lurched at the mere sight of him, but she started to run towards Kid, her heart thumping wildly in her chest. Exactly in the moment he started to scream "Wicks!" she jumped on him, throwing him on the ground and fighting with him for several seconds, until she was able to grasp his wrists.

"Kid!" she panted, out of breath.

She had straddled him, leaning on him with all of her weight to pin him on the ground.

"Lou!" he exclaimed, widening his eyes and pausing his fighting. "Lou…what are you doing here??!"

"I've come to bring you home, that's what I'm doing!"

"Let me go Lou, let me kill Wicks for you, and then we can go home together. You'll never get a chance to recover if I don't do it!"

"I'll never get a chance to recover if you DO it, Kid!" she responded fiercely, leaning over him until her face was mere inches apart from his. "I don't want to see you kill or get killed by that man, you understand me?"

Her hands loosened their hold on his wrists and went to caress his curly hair on the side of his head. "Please Kid, let's go back home. I know I worried you so much, but it's finished now. I want only to start again, with your help, as the other time," she pleaded him.

Kid looked up at her soft eyes and his heart gladdened for what he saw in them. They were strong and determined again, even if tainted with the worry for him; the dullness and the desperation harboured before in them were disappeared. Lost in the moment the rider drew up his arms on her hips, unaware of the people gathered around them.

"I promise," he whispered.

******

Jimmy had jumped on his feet right after Lou and now he stood here, few steps away from the couple, with his gun drawn and ready to shoot. He scanned the surrounding for any sign of the man Kid had just called out, or better, he was about to call out before his wife jumped on him.

He remembered a similar situation, Kid had knocked him unconscious to prevent him from calling out Longley. That was a much better way to avoid a duel, he reflected with a smirk, rather than being hogtied on the back of a wagon.

"Ok guys, go away. Never see a discussion between a married couple, before?!" he shooed away the aghast people watching the couple on the ground.

"And you two," he continued addressing Kid and Lou, "get up before the sheriff arrests you for indecency or lewdness in a public place!" he teased. "Or Wicks catches us off guard," he muttered darkly.

Chances were that Wicks hadn't even heard Kid, but they can be sure of that, so it was better if they went away fast.

Finally the two riders got up from the awkward position they were in. They straightened their clothes, embarrassed, but as soon as they were on their feet again they returned to hug each other.

"Are you sure you want that, Lou?" Kid asked, gently cupping her face. "One word and I'll make him pay for all he did to you."

"No Kid," she responded firmly. The hard glint in his usually soft eyes worried the girl; "I don't want you to kill Wicks for me. I reflected about that, I want to press the charges against him," she said.

She leaned on his chest, holding on his shirt, closing her eyes and smelling his familiar, comforting scent. Kid couldn't do anything else than encircle her wife's tiny waist and sigh. His heart was still burning with rage and desire to revenge. But Lou was more important than everything else, the only thing that counted was that Lou had finally came out from her cocoon and was ready to start again with her life.

"Are you sure?" he said worried, leaning his forehead on hers. "If they find out you're working for the Russell Major and Waddell, you'll have to leave your job; and then you'll have to face him on the court, it-it will be hideous, you know? I'll be by your side for all the time, but you'll be the one to bear the most of it, do you know this?"

Kid was listing all the fear and the doubts Lou was feeling, and for a moment her decision wavered. But then she remembered him lying motionless on the waystation's yard and the terror that gripped her heart in that moment.

"Yes I'm sure" she responded then, rising on her tiptoes to kiss him lightly on the lips. "I love you."

That simple gesture brought tears in Kid's eyes, since it was the closest she got to him in weeks.

"I love you too," he said when he returned to look at her.

******

"Jimmy? What I told Kid counts for you too," the girl said to her friend while they walked away from the crowded street.

The guilty look on the brown-haired rider showed Lou had hit his thoughts perfectly.

"I don't want you or any other of the boys flirting with the crazy idea to avenge me. I've already wasted enough time because of Wicks and I don't want anybody getting hurt because of me. Am I clear??"

"Jimmy?" Lou pressed him, "Am I clear??"

She did look like Emma when she was scolding one of them, Jimmy thought.

"Ok Lou, you won," he said.

"Good," she smiled, "let's go to the sheriff, then."

Before to meet the man Lou insisted on buying a dress, they didn't know what kind of man the sheriff was, and she didn't want to give him a bad impression.

******

With his clear eyes and steady demeanour, sheriff Lee Hanson reminded them a bit of Sam. When they entered in his office he was with his wife and baby daughter and his affectionate behaviour reassured Lou. A man who loved his family would be more sympathetic about what happened to her, wouldn't he? The girl thought worriedly.

The truth was that it was hard for her not to feel guilty or ashamed of herself. Despite of the fact she was Kid's wife and Wicks had attacked their home to kidnap her, she still was afraid of what people would think of her. They would thought that a decent woman wouldn't have stirred the interest of a man like Wicks, that it was happened because she went around alone, doing a man job. All these fears had kept swirling into her mind since the first time Wicks took her five years before and it wasn't easy for her to get rid of them.

She let Kid made the talk, while she gripped his shirt, half hidden between him and Jimmy. Hanson's eyes hardened when Kid finished. His face showed disgust and Lou cringed, fearing the sheriff's disdain was directed to her.

"Wicks, did you say?" he asked reaching a filling cabinet and rustling among the papers in there. "We had had several report against him, but nobody had ever wanted to press the charges, until now."

"You've been very brave Mrs McCloud," he said turning to look at Lou. The kind look he gave her warmed her heart. "That man will pay for what he did, you can be sure of that," he added, seriously looking into her eyes.

She didn't want to stay at Hanson's house, as the man suggested, and instead she went with the others. They found Wicks eating in a fine restaurant, with some well-dressed and refined men. The sheriff didn't let himself intimidated by the owner's protests or the scandalized glances of the guests. They purposefully strode through the room, their rugged clothes in sheer contrast with the place, and reached Wicks' table.

"Lyle Wicks, I declare you under arrest!" Hanson didn't care to keep his voice low. He wanted everyone heard what he was saying.

"And for what?" Wicks asked, without losing his composure.

He did have a lot of good acquaintances, even in that small forgotten town he decided to stay waiting for the right moment to take Lou back. He hadn't renounced to the girl, she was able to escape from him for the second time, and for the second time he lose one of his best girls because of her. He did want to make her pay, now more than ever. He would dismiss the question with the sheriff soon, and then he would come back to his main purpose.

"For what you did to me."

From behind Hanson and his deputies Lou appeared, approaching the table and looking straight into Wicks eyes, his mere nearness made her sick and nauseous, but she didn't want to give the satisfaction to see the fear in her eyes. Kid and Jimmy were beside her, and this gave her the force to go on.

"And what did I do to you, my dear?" he smirked, he was sure Louise wouldn't be able to tell out loud what he did. She never did so in the last five years and now it wouldn't be different. He had already found himself in this kind of situation in the past, and he knew that the women usually preferred to keep their mouth shut rather than ruin her reputation.

"You aren't in the position to talk, do you know that? A woman like you, living as a man, who do you think they believe to, when you'll testify on the court?"

"You bastard!" Kid exclaimed, he had taken all of his willpower not to jump on him as soon as he laid his eyes on him, but his mocking words made him see red. Only Lou's desperate grasp on his sleeve stopped him.

"Louise is a married woman and you kidnap her from our house," surprisingly it was Jimmy the one keeping a cold head, even if a vein was furiously pulsating on his neck. "You attacked a harmless woman with her baby and you tried to kill a man in cold blood. What do you think the jury would think of that??"

Wicks' smile frozen on his lips. Murmurs can be heard through al the room, and even his guest started to look at him with contempt. He didn't lose his composure though.

"I didn't kidnap you, Louise," he responded then, "you willingly came with me if I do remember well."

"Only because you and your men were holding at a gunpoint a mother and her baby!" she was tired to be afraid of Wicks, to have him rule her life, to feel ashamed for what he did to her.

"Listen to me, everyone!" she raised her voice, turning to look at all the people in the room, "that man, who look as a gentleman in that fine suit and talk so politely and charmingly, that man is a child violator, a kidnapper, someone who wouldn't think twice to kill someone for his own pursuit! He deluded me and raped me when I was only thirteen and then he did it again, even if I was a married woman, not caring of who he destroyed in the process!"

People raised from their seat, utterly scandalized by her words, some women even fainted, someone looked at her with a mix of pity and disgust, but there are some look of compassion though, of sympathy and of rage toward the man who did that to her.

Wicks' face became a mask of fury.

"You little whore…" he exclaimed and leapt forward her with a gun on his hand, but Kid was faster, he showed Lou out of the way and fired at him, aiming to the chest. The man died before to reach the floor.

Lou stood up from and looked down at the man whose memory had tormented her for the last five years. He was death now, she would never have been afraid of him ever again. Never.

A sob bubbled out of her chest and she felt her knees tremble, but Kid was ready to catch her.

"It's finished now, Louise, it all finished." He said with a trembling voice.

She started to cry then. Her nightmare was truly ended now.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Jimmy observed the sleeping girl on the other side of the fire. Lou was tightly wrapped in her bedroll and Kid was sitting near her, protectively stroking her side.

After Hanson and his men took care of Wicks' body, the sheriff offered them hospitality for the night, but Lou refused. Despite the man's kind offer she had wanted to leave that town as soon as possible. They didn't make too far before it was too dark to ride, though, so they stopped as soon as they found a good spot to set up the camp.

Lou gave a couple of bites to one of Mrs. Hanson's sandwiches before rolling up in a ball and going to sleep. She was clearly exhausted, emotionally and physically drained, and it took her no more than five minutes to fell asleep under Kid (and Jimmy's) worried gazes.

"Is it true?" the dark-haired rider asked after a while, "is it true what Lou said, about Wicks taking her when she was thirteen…?"

He had a bitter lump on his stomach, the thought that Lou was violated when she was so young made him feel sick.

"Yes," was Kid's grim response, "the story we told you is true. We met as kids in St Joe, we both worked in Wicks' brothel, we were going to leave but he got to us first. That night, his men beat me senseless and when I regained consciousness, it already happened. I couldn't do anything for her," he concluded bitterly.

"Don't say that, Kid. You were just a boy yourself and you did as much as you could."

"But this doesn't change what he did to her back then, and what he did again. I'd like to kill him one thousand times more. I still am so angry that it scares me."

Jimmy couldn't do anything else than nod at his words. Lou was special for him and his heart was burning with rage; but he couldn't image what Kid was feeling, having the woman he loved enduring that ordeal.

"You have to focus on Lou now, Kid. Wicks is dead and Lou needs you, your thick head should think only about her, and not about crazy stunts like the one you pulled today, ok?"

Kid smiled lightly.

"Since when have you been the voice of the reason, Jimmy?"

"Well," his friend smirked, "it's a hard job but someone had to do it, especially since you stopped being the boring, level-headed one of the bunch."

"Ha-ah, very funny," Kid responded throwing a stick that Jimmy easily dodged.

******

Once back at home, Lou slowly started to get back to her old self again. She insisted on wearing her boyish clothes to work around the Station, even if her position as a rider wasn't clear. Sheriff Hanson didn't report she was a woman working as a rider; since he didn't have any interest in complicating her life. But Louise hadn't made any run in a long time and this didn't pass unnoticed in the other Stations.

The girl didn't seem too worried about the prospect of losing her job, though, neither did Kid. Actually for him it was enough she had started living again, and if she really was going to be fired, then they would find another solution. They were together, Lou was recovering and they had a family that would never let them down; these were the only important things in that moment.

But under the surface there still was something wrong, Kid could feel it. Lou seemed at ease around the boys, joking and fooling around with them as she had always done, but Kid did notice how her shirts were always all buttoned, even if it was a hot day, and how she tried not to have any physical contact with anyone, not even with him.

They continued to sleep in Emma's guestroom together and Lou had even let him sleep under the blankets, but she always rolled up in herself on her side of the bed, as far as possible from her husband and it was obvious that she was uncomfortable for Kid to see her in longjohns; so much that Kid had begun to coming in their room only after she was already in bed, and to change for the night in the dark, so she wouldn't be forced to look at him if she didn't want to.

Neither of them had ever talked aloud about that, but it was obvious it was making both of them suffer. More than one night Lou fell asleep with tears in her eyes. It would be so simple to reach out her hand and grab Kid's, to let him hug her, at least; but she just wasn't able to close the distance between them.

Some mornings, raised on her elbow, she observed Kid sleeping, he always lay on his side, his back to her, with his face scrunched, un-relaxed even during sleep. Her heart constricted painfully every time she looked at him like this, thinking that she caused his worries and discomfort. But she had stopped thinking he was better off without her, this time she wanted to fight and return the old Lou who married Kid in St Joe not so long ago.

For this reason, when the time to choose what clothing she would wear at Emma and Sam's wedding arrived, her mind was already set. The couple had delayed the ceremony to give Lou the time to recover, but at a certain point the girl herself insisted they set a date. It was not fair they had to wait for her to start their life together.

"Louise, dear, are you sure?" Rachel asked incredulously when Lou told her and Emma what she wanted to wear.

The two women were looking at her, with glistening eyes and sympathetic, smiles on their faces. The thought that her decision caused such a commotion made Lou almost change her mind. It was already difficult enough without them making all that fuss over it.

"Yes," she repeated nervously, "yes I've decided to come at the wedding as Louise, as we already planned. But please, don't make such a big deal of it, ok? I won't wear anything fancy, my pink dress will work just fine."

Rachel was about to reply that it was a big deal. It was the first time she was willing to wear something feminine again. It should be celebrated and she should wear something really special for the occasion.

But Emma leaned a hand on her friend's arm and stopped her before she could speak. Lou took a big step taking that decision, but giving too much importance to it would make her only more uncomfortable.

"Ok, Louise. We'll put some flowers on your hair and you'll be just perfect," The red-haired girl woman said, "What do you think Rachel?" she added looking pointedly at the blonde.

"Sure, some flowers and the earrings I'll lend you and you'll be a lovely maid of honor; or maybe just a lovely guest," she hurried to add when Lou squinted her eyes in horror.

She nodded, looking at the two women with tears in her eyes. She felt strangely exhilarated, as if she had just climbed a giant mountain, reached the biggest goal she could, and not just chosen the dress to wear at a wedding.

"I, I will go now. There're still chores to do."

She rushed out the parlor, on unsteady legs, she herself couldn't believe what she had just decided to do. She wasn't sure she would be able to be in a room full of people dressed as a girl, but she didn't want to back off, she didn't want to be ruled by her own fears ever again.

******

When the big day arrived all the fuss was around the bride, so Lou's decision was somewhat less evident, much to the girl's relief.

Rachel had adorned the modest neckline of her dress with a new lace collar and she had pulled up her hair and entwined them with some baby's-breath and other small flowers, in this way Lou looked smart enough to attend to a ceremony, without being too showy.

Teaspoon and the boys looked all emotional when she descended the stairs, which made Lou's stomach churn; but fortunately as soon as Emma appeared, all the attention shifted on her.

Her fiery red hair were pinned back in her usual bun, but Rachel had been able to tame her unruly curls and now they framed her face in soft ringlets, instead of standing all around her head like a halo. She wore a cream colored dress, made of several thin layers of lawn, and she looked as delicate and light as a feather.

"Oohh" and "Aahh" erupted from the boys and Emma blushed, looking even lovelier. Teaspoon offered her his arm and they walked out of the house, everyone filing outside behind them.

When Kid took her arm, Lou could tell he had tears in his eyes, but fortunately he didn't say anything. She wasn't sure she couldn't bear to hear him say how beautiful she was, so she sent him a trembling smile and together they reached the others.

******

Louise sat in a corner of the big room, watching the people dancing around her. The ceremony had gone well, they all were seated on the first pews of the small church, she was between Kid and Jimmy so she felt somewhat protected. But after that, at the party organized in the social hall, she began to feel nervous. Kid had remained near her but the others were around the room, dancing and enjoying themselves.

She offered Rachel to look after Agnes so Teaspoon was able to convince the woman to dance with him, but she herself didn't want to dance. That would be the first time she would have been able to dance with Kid in front of everyone, but she wasn't ready to do such a thing yet. She felt already observed enough like that.

Despite her saying he could, Kid refused to ask anyone else do dance, and Lou was sorry he couldn't enjoy the party because of her; but she didn't want to start to pity herself again so she tried to keep the conversation as lively as possible. Kid from his part, didn't mind he couldn't dance, for him it was enough to see Lou smile and laugh, and seemingly at ease in the middle of that crowd.

Things went smoothly for almost all the evening, but at a certain point Johnny Sanders went to Lou and asked her to dance. Johnny was a good guy but he was a bit too boisterous and rash, so when Lou politely refused his invitation, he didn't go away instead he took her by the hands and pulled her on her feet.

"C'mon miss; just one dance, you must be bored sitting here all the evening. Kid I'll bring her back to you, don't worry," he added reaching out his hand to grab her by the elbow and steer her to the dance floor.

When she felt herself dragged away from her safe spot Lou panicked.

"No!" she screamed, and without even being aware of what she was doing she slapped Johnny hard.

The young man stepped back, holding his cheek, mortified and astonished.

"I didn't mean to harm you miss, I just want a dance with you…"

Lou felt her eyes filling with tears, she muttered an apology and dashed outside.

Few minutes after, Kid found her crying behind the livery.

"Lou," he called, gingerly placing a hand on her shoulder, "I'm sorry I wasn't able to stop Johnny."

"It's not that," Lou moaned, she felt so ashamed and angry at herself, everything was going so well but then she hadn't be able to handle a silly unexpected even like that, "I just slapped a man because he asked me to dance!"

"Well, I can't blame you," he half-smiled, "I was going to punch him, for giving the eye to my lovely wife."

"I'm not joking, Kid!" the girl exclaimed getting angry, "I'm not able to act normally around people! What kind of person have I become??"

"Don't say that. You had a stressful day and you snapped, but just think that a week ago you didn't even want to come into town. This has been a big improvement. Don't be too hard to yourself."

He gathered her in his arms then. Lou stood rigid, but she didn't protest and, after a moment, she hid her face in his jacket, letting his familiar warmth spread all over her comfortingly. She muttered some incoherent protests over what he just said, but in the end she just snuggled closer to him. Kid didn't dare to move a muscle, he didn't want to scare her away, so he stood there with her arms draped around his waist, content just to feel her close again.

"Are you ready to come back inside?" he asked when she finally returned to look at him.

"I don't want to," she pouted like a little girl.

She really didn't feel like going back and bearing people's stares, after the scene she made.

"Let's go to ride, instead," she said

"Are you serious? Lightning is back at the Station…"

She had come into town in the buckboard with Rachel and Agnes, therefore they would have to ride double.

"We'll ride Katy together, please Kid. I don't want to come back in there…"

She still was too unnerved to be in the middle of a crowd again and she needed to be in the open, away from everyone.

She mounted on Katy behind the Kid, clinging to him tighter and tighter as they left the town and the horse began to race, spurred on by her.

"Fast, Kid, faster!" she kept saying.

Lou felt better than she had ever felt in a long time. She thought that dressing like a girl and going into town would made her feel more self-confident, finally comfortable with her own body; but she realized she never felt so good as now, with the wind on her face, the open prairie around her and Kid's safe and strong body to hold onto.

Suddenly lightning exploded, the weather had been cloudy since the morning and the sky had grown darker and darker with the passing hours, until it finally started to rain. It was a real downpour and soon they both were soaked to the skin, but Lou didn't care, she welcomed the cleansing feeling the raindrops brought.

"C'mon Lou! Hurry up! You'll catch your death if you stay in the rain like this!" Kid gently scolded her while they crossed the yard to reach Emma's house. "Here take my jacket," he said.

"Oh well, because your jacket is perfectly dry, right?" the girl teased him, "we can't get wetter than we already are Kid! One minute more won't do any harm!"

The rider shook his head and encircled her waist to make her go faster, and together they ran under the porch. Once safely inside Kid released her and stepped back.

"You're soaked..." he said, suddenly embarrassed.

The material of the dress was clinging all over her small curves, almost transparent. That morning, seeing her so beautiful in the simple dress she wore at their wedding, it took him all his will not to take her in his arms and kiss her before all his friends, but now to see her disheveled like that, so lively and excited, was a temptation too big.

"I'll prepare you a bath, you wait here, ok?"

He hastily retreated to the kitchen before the desire to peel all her wet clothes off her and make love to her right there in the parlor became too strong.

Lou heard the splash of the water from the other side of the door; Kid had prepared the bath for her in the mudroom and then he went to wash himself in the kitchen. She sighed and curled to herself tighter, the warm sensation of well-being had disappeared and she felt low and sad again.

Hearing the movements in the other room couldn't help the feeling of longing that unexpectedly spread inside of her. She would have preferred to have Kid near to warm her up as no hot water could ever do.

She started to image a shirtless Kid rinsing the water from his strong chest, the droplets of water sliding down his neck to his shoulder, the way his wet skin would glisten at the light of the lamps, and her heart began to quicken.

How much she would like to rise from the washtub and reach Kid, but she couldn't muster the courage to do so. She looked down at her body and all she saw were the scratches and bruises that Wicks had left on her, even if they were healed weeks ago. She still could feel his suffocating body on her, his hands hitting and clenching; how could Kid want her again after that?

Kid thought she couldn't stand his closeness, but it wasn't the truth. Lou felt ashamed of her own body, and despite the look of longing in his eyes; she couldn't believe he desired her.

"Lou?" Kid's calling distracted her from her depressing thoughts, "I've done here, I'll wait for you upstairs."

"No…" she found herself mumbling.

"Lou? What did you say? Are you ok?"

'No I'm not, I want you to be with me but I'm too scared to ask you," she wanted to answer.

"Yes I'm ok, Kid," she said instead, "I'm almost done, I'll be with you in few minutes."

"Ok, then," he responded and went away.

Hearing him going away she sobbed out of frustration, but then she rose from the washtub with a new resolution. She dried herself and then she went to the shelves where Emma first, and now Rachel, kept the clean, dry clothes before to give them to the riders. After a moment of hesitation, she picked one of Kid's shirts and then she went upstairs, with her heart hammering in her chest.

******

"May I come in?"

Kid heard the feeble voice of Lou and turned down the lamps a little, to give her the privacy she needed without leaving the room in the dark.

"Come in, Lou, I turned down ..."

When he looked up at her the voice died in his throat.

She wasn't wearing the oversized longjohns he expected, but one of his blue shirts that reached the middle of her bare thighs. He could tell she didn't wear anything under it. His whole body tensed and he couldn't help but stare at her hungrily.

"Lou…" he whispered hoarsely. "Lou, I'll wait you outside so you can settle for the night," he said hurriedly getting up from the bed.

He wasn't sure he would be able to come back inside, though. To sleep in the same bed knowing that a barely clothed Lou would be lying at his side, would be torture. Why did she want to torture him like that?

He gathered the last bit of control he had and went to the door, but when he passed near Lou, she grabbed his sleeve.

"Please, don't go away," she said looking at him with her big, deep eyes.

"I- I'll wait just outside the door, I won't be far."

"Please Kid, stay with me, don't leave me alone," she pleaded gripping tighter the material of his top.

"D-don't. Please, don't ask me that," he took a step back, "I'm not made of stone, Lou. I love you and I couldn't ever hurt you, but I'm just a man. How can resist having you near me dressed like-like this?"

"Don't resist, then," she said coming close to him again and placing her hands on his chest, "Don't resist…"

She rose on her tiptoes and kissed him, holding him tightly. After a moment of hesitation Kid moaned her name and clutched her closer. They stumbled on their bed, still holding each other and when the kiss ended Kid took her face in his hands.

"Are you sure, Lou?" he asked worriedly, his desire was evident but he still didn't want to lose his control, because she was trembling in his arms.

"I'm not sure of anything anymore Kid, but I know I need you."

To mark her words she began to unbutton her shirt, looking straight at Kid. His blue eyes burned onto her skin, but she didn't stop, and when she finally opened completed the shirt she pushed the hems away. She felt vulnerable under his heated stare but when he returned to look at her, Lou didn't see anything else than love and awe in his blue eyes. He looked at her as if she was the most precious thing in the world.

"I love you, Louise," he said with a broken voice before to lower himself and kiss her.

He slowly rediscovered her, murmuring words of love and reassurance, and when he finally made love to her, Lou clung desperately to him, as if she would never let him go. She cried earnestly in his arms after, venting out all the pain, the fear and the shame, finding her peace at last. She fell asleep in Kid's warm embrace, still united to him, and she never felt so safe and so good as in that moment.


	19. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"Rider's coming!"

The familiar cry made Lou turn her head toward the approaching rider and she jumped down from the fence to welcome him, smiling.

The morning after Emma and Sam's wedding, Kid had woken alone in their bed and he had immediately feared to have scared Lou off, despite the love shining in her eyes during their magical time together. But when she returned in their room, still wearing his shirt and bringing a tray with breakfast for two, her eyes were sparkling and Kid immediately understood that everything was going to be fine.

She had a new resolution in her and, as the first thing, she had wanted Kid to start doing his rides again. He had stopped because of her, but the girl didn't want him to lose his job, since she had been fired herself. In fact one day a letter arrived from Russell, Majors and Waddell stating what Lou was fearing for a while: that she had been dismissed.

The first night without Kid wasn't easy, the anxiety began to build in her as soon as he left the Station and, even if she decided to return to sleep in the bunkhouse not to be alone, nightmares haunted her sleep. But she didn't let this discourage her and it became easier and easier with each time Kid was away.

"Kid!" she called, running toward him as he entered the yard.

The rider jumped down from Katy and hugged his wife as soon as his feet took the ground.

"How was the run?" "How have you been?" both of them asked at the same time and then they started to laugh at the silliness of the situation.

Kid encircled her waist and they went to the barn, while Cody couldn't help smirking at the sight.

"Well, everything has got back to normal, with the hugs in the middle of the yard, the kisses and all the other mushy stuff," he remarked to Buck and Ike, who were sitting with him on the porch.

"You're right Cody," the Kiowa responded with a smile, "but I don't care at all!"

"So there isn't any sender…" Lou asked perplexed while holding a quite thick envelope Kid gave her.

"Nothing, I find it in the mail I took in Blue Creek, it was addressed to Kid and Lou McCloud, but it didn't say anything else."

"What do you think it is?" the girl asked a bit worried.

"I have no idea, Lou, the only way to discover it is to open it, c'mon," he gently nudged her.

She finally tore it open and what they found it was something completely unexpected. There was a note from Cora Murphy and some official looking papers with the name of Charlotte Rowan on it.

The blonde prostitute had returned to St Joe as soon as she heard Wicks was dead, she didn't want to remain in 'that hole of town' one minute more, as she stated, plus the girls from the brothel wanted her back. Now that their boss was dead they had found themselves unemployed and asked to Cora to come back and guide them, and they preferred to be under a woman who knew what being a prostitute was like, rather than another hideous scoundrel like Wicks.

Cora had found Charlotte's will in the middle of Wicks' documents and seeing that the woman had left all the money she had saved to Louise and Kid, the prostitute decided to respect her friend's last will and sent the papers to the couple.

Lou was crying when she finished to read, Charlotte had left all her saving to them, so they could have a good life. She had helped them until the very end.

"Shh…sweetie, don't cry," Kid soothed her, even if he himself had tears in his eyes. "You know, between what she left us and our saving we'll be able to start the little ranch we had always dreamed about and bring Miah and Tessie to live with us," he concluded with a broken voice.

"We'll call our first daughter after her," the girl sniffed, "and we'll tell all our children how special she was…"

"Children?" he asked raising a eyebrow, his heart already racing at the thought. "How many children did you want to have, if I dare to ask?" he asked mischievously.

"One, ten, I don't care how many, the only thing that counts is that we'll be together, forever."

"Forever," Kid echoed her before to pull her close and kissing away her tears.

THE END


End file.
